LIFE FUCKING SUCKS ASS
hey everybody. i swear i'm so fuckign tried of trying to please me goddamn dad. he thinks he's so fuckign smart. i asked him if i could go to church because i had two C's in my classses. and he made it sound like i'd beable to go. but then when he came home he's like well you don't diserve to go. I was so fucking pissed. I think i should just give up because i'm so fucking fed up withh thiis fucking disapointment he's putting on me. i'm sick of my whole family disapointing me. i just realy miss seeing matt and i miss him holding me. i just don't know how much more of this i can take.i miss him to death and my dad isn't making this anyeaser on either of us and i swear if i work my ass off just so i can go with matt on his birthday and my dad says i can't go i 'm gonna fucking kill myself cause i'm sick of all this bullshit. honestly i'm only putting up with right now because of matt. if it wasn't for him i would have killed myself so long ago. it just seems so much better to do it like that. just go and burn in flames for the rest of your life. that is so much better than what i have here exvept for matt he is everything to me. and i can't betray him like that so i have to stay here on earth and put up woth all of this bullshit. i can't juyst do it anymore. i'm so tired of it. i am. i just feel so fucking alone right now and i'm scared my dad will make us fall apart because he won't let me see matt./ i just ... fuck i don't know. i've got to go.
-lizzy
-lizzy