the third person drama
puffing away one after another lighting up breathing in putting out repeating this all night
watching the sky to see if the sun has shadowed the moon anymore then the last minute
crying my eyes out for the mistakes i have made
the mistakes others made, no the choices they made that tore my body in two
the choices they made to hurt a innocent girl who was drinking her problems away
drinking down the sorrow and the pain that was left by an ex who left her alone
who was supposed to be at her side in the end of time
who was her first and now she thinks is her only love
friends accusing and believing others over her
forcing her to stay away and change her life again
to start over to wipe her slate clean
but maybe thats for the better
she misses her life before she moved
she misses her life before he died
she misses her friends who actaully cared
who never touched her wrong
who listened to her vent and went out for late night coffee and cigs
the girls and boys who were at her side through thick and thin
not just when it was convient for them
growing up and growing out of her shell
wishing that things would grow into something real
something free and something happy
but as she hopes and wishes
she highly doubts life is going to get better any time soon
she knows her is doomed
she has pulled herself into her own black hole
and she is struggling to claw her way out back into the universe.