I'm coming! I'm coming!
These past few weeks have been horrific. I cannot tell you how much stress and pressure has been boiling within me. Even tears could not realease the pressure valve. I felt that I was going to explode, snap any minute.
It's very frustrating to get pat answers like, oh, Jesus will help you. Pray and it will go away, or just think nice things. It fueled my anxiety and anger. Like Jesus isn't the breathe I breathe already. Common' he is my everything! But there are reasons why we feel things, we are given brains and emotions to deal with these things. Are we suppose to pretend that they do not exist? Are we in heaven already? Did someone forget to tell me?
The answer I believe is not to hide behind a mask of spirituality that says "I am unaffected" or to climb a hill that I know is too steep without the proper equipment or to walk on water that you were never asked to walk on. That is faith without God. Presumption. What I notice many people doing to day is ignoring the facts and jumping in the water without knowing how to swim first. That's fine. I have faith too. But my faith is in God and not myself. I will assume nothing. I will not be ignorant of the facts of life. There is a fine line between walking in faith and walking in assumption.
Yes, I am coming...wait for it. There is a season to everything.
I would like to walk in faith without people judging me for my humanity. I am not superior to anyone or anything. I am a vessel and hopefully, I can quench the thirst of others.
Is God somehow not working in my life through my circumstances? Is God only around happy people? Victorious people? I am sorry people, but I am human. Jesus was human. I love, I hate, I cry, I laugh. And most of all I feel. Is it so wrong to feel pain? Why must I hide it and pretend it doesn't exist?
It's very frustrating to get pat answers like, oh, Jesus will help you. Pray and it will go away, or just think nice things. It fueled my anxiety and anger. Like Jesus isn't the breathe I breathe already. Common' he is my everything! But there are reasons why we feel things, we are given brains and emotions to deal with these things. Are we suppose to pretend that they do not exist? Are we in heaven already? Did someone forget to tell me?
The answer I believe is not to hide behind a mask of spirituality that says "I am unaffected" or to climb a hill that I know is too steep without the proper equipment or to walk on water that you were never asked to walk on. That is faith without God. Presumption. What I notice many people doing to day is ignoring the facts and jumping in the water without knowing how to swim first. That's fine. I have faith too. But my faith is in God and not myself. I will assume nothing. I will not be ignorant of the facts of life. There is a fine line between walking in faith and walking in assumption.
Yes, I am coming...wait for it. There is a season to everything.
I would like to walk in faith without people judging me for my humanity. I am not superior to anyone or anything. I am a vessel and hopefully, I can quench the thirst of others.
Is God somehow not working in my life through my circumstances? Is God only around happy people? Victorious people? I am sorry people, but I am human. Jesus was human. I love, I hate, I cry, I laugh. And most of all I feel. Is it so wrong to feel pain? Why must I hide it and pretend it doesn't exist?