(no subject)
herro.
sorry for all the absences.
school REALLY hasn't been all that busy but, I have been busy with it, I guess.
i'm feeling pretty accomplished so far. I've gotten all of my lab quizzes done on time.
the crazy thing is that all four of them had 10 questions; and i got 3 wrong every time. how the hell does that happen???
life has been pretty hectic and quite eventful.
I've made new friends and conjured up old ones; even kids I never thought would give me the time of day.
Which is absolutely exciting, I know I kept bitching that I never made any new friends and my friendships were getting stale; but, I'm happy with my friends for once.
Of course, there will be drama. I hate that it will never cease but, what am I to do?
One cannot avoid things forever...
Anyway, my first class was cancelled and here I am in the library. I'm sort of glad because i haven't read or written anything for english. however, I DO have a first exam in my Weather and Climate class today. So, when I'm finished here I'm going to be studying for that.
I wanted to get this down because it's been festering in my silly little head for about two weeks now. writing it down now only makes it more true...
I told Verde that I liked this Greaser kid about a month and a half ago (summarizing, I dont remember the EXACT date, pshh silly) and ever since then, shes been picking on me. I told her that telling her didn't necessarily mean I REALLY liked the kid. I just thought he was interesting and maybe worth something to me.
So, Verde and I started hanging out with Anarchy and Greaser in their wonderous yellow of house of charlean adventures. It's sort of morphed into an alternate existence and a safe haven. It's actually quite wonderful. <3
Anyhow, I've learned that Greaser hasn't had very good luck on the dating scene and he verbalizes alot of his troubles and even makes fun of his dilemma himself.
Now, I've tried to steer clear of liking ANYONE because I want to focus on other things and not boys or girls. Because we all know that fucks things up for all of us... *rolls eyes*
But, this kid is so adorable and maybe its me feeling bad for him. The girl he was interested in (we'll call her Amber Sweet) toyed with him and did the "I like you, but I'm not sure if I likeyou like THAT. but, I might!" Just plain jerked him around and was a manipulative person. Sounds like another A. Sweet to me...
But, I know how it feels to be puppetted and he's way too nice of a guy to have that done to. Sure, it's easy to mess around with him and tease and stuff. It's one thing to be silly and play around but its another to take advantage of the kid because he's nice and generally accepting.
It also helps/hinders that the boy is gorgeous. I know this has NOTHING to do with how his appearance is but, he's jewish *smiles*. HAHA! I don't like white guys, and for the record Hurban is Norwegian, so shut it.
Those kids in that house have introduced me to a new "category" if you will, called rockabilly/psychobilly.
Its swing music added to punk rock. fucking sweet.
oh yes, and he plays an upright bass and it's hot. It's funny cuz I think it may be taller than him, ha!
I was having a coffee high one night and had an urge to play it so I did. I think I played system of a down on it, eww.
not that soad is bad, just off topic for a bass that plays rockabilly things...
anyway!
its hard to explain how I feel about him. He's got fuckign awesome Jew-Hair, he sort of mohawk cut it but he hasn't put it up yet. so it just kind of sticks straight up and it drives me crazy. Not insane crazy but, like an "oh god you're hot" kind of crazy. I've sort of started picking on him, I hate my stupid ways...
I want to like him but, I feel like he wouldn't be interested, and theres Anarchy.
My new bff. haha! Creeper.
*SIGH* she likes Greaser too, but Greaser sees her as a sibling. But, honestly, I think they'd be great together!!! But, she's worried about losing him as a friend. she refered to him as her "rock," if she lost him she'd be lost herself.
It's incredibly sweet, hehe i was kind of crying...sorry. but, they're super cute when they're around each other, just..aww!
Anyway, I started feeling terrible monday morning, I woke up early and was kind of pondering to myself.
And out of nowher I started getting all teary and I realized I was thinking about Ian and his clearly degrading words about himself. and, if someone that beautiful (inside and out) has such a problem with himself what do the rest of us have to look forward to?
For example, okay Im sorry to even type this, Verde will make fun of him about his small weiner. Which is totally untrue because he wears those tight plaid bondage pants, and well...its sort of plain to see.
HAHA!!! Anarchy made a comment about them and I don't think he's worn them since. I would laugh super loud, but in the library!!
PFFFFFFT!!!!!!!
but, he'll make comments about those things about himself, and say things like "well, i'll cut [it] off because I'm not going to be getting any anytime soon..." and sure, its weird for me to be saying this but, shut up, yes he will. AND NO NOT NECESSARILY FROM ME.
he's a whiny baby man who burns spatulas...
*ahem*
but, it just makes me sad that he's such a great person who seems to be marred by people who are shallow and bitchy. he just hasnt come across anyone who is available and good for him.
Its just that "look but dont touch" rule given to a single girl...*sigh*
alright I have to cram some studying in, my class is in 12 minutes. Adios
<3 lock and load
"They say what doesn't kill us makes us who we are. All this time and everythings changed but, I still feel the same. All good things eventually end and get washed down the drain. What a disaster it would be if you discovered that I care; a little too much for friends but not enough to share." - "Has to be you" Motion City Soundtrack