lame english
Useless Fact #69: "Almost" is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.
DISCLAIMER: The following is intended for humourous purposes only, and is not meant to offend anybody (or be taken seriously, for that matter). Waste of your time is at your own discretion and not my fault (not that anybody reads this, anyway)! I just thought it would be fun to jokingly rant about something that not serious for a change XD (there are too many brackets! Don't read anything in brackets :P)
We've all heard it before: "i before e, except after c, except when said 'ay' like neighbour and weigh". Yeah...OKAY. Last I checked, I take science courses, not freaking sceince. English is so weird. Or did I mean wierd? Notice how that commonly known rule says "except" twice in itself...English is loaded with exceptions. The rule might as well be "i before e, except when it isn't", because that's just as useful. And isn't "isn't" a stupid word? Apparently contractions like that were made because people were too lazy to say or spell out entire words. Same with abbreviations. I mean why the heck is abbreviation such a freaking long word? Kind of defeats the purpose, no? Why do people come up with ridiculously long words if they end up getting abbreviated or are just never used. I mean who the heck says "honorificabilitudinity" (yes, that is a word: look it up) when they can just say "honorableness"? Some of you out there might be complaining that I forgot the u in "honour" and that I'm not very patriotic for going against Canadian spelling. Well I don't see you dressed up as a maple leaf, wielding a hockey stick, either. I do, in fact, use Canadian spelling most of the time anyway. But more importantly, why are there even different forms of English, anyway? It just adds to the ridiculousness of an already corrupt language. What's with that u? What's du? (haha, ignore the lame calculus reference.)
Anyway that's not the point. Where was I...? Oh yes, "Isn't" is a stupid word. Right. "Isn't" is supposed to be the contraction for "is not", isn't it? Well guess what? The question I just asked there, "isn't it?", just proved itself wrong. If I expanded the contraction I would get "is not it?" which makes no freaking sense. The intended question is actually "is it not?", not "is not it?", yet people use "isn't it?" all the time. Kudos to whoever came up with that one, you have screwed English a little bit further. And I bet all those contractions and quotation marks have confused the crap out of you. Heaven forbid that I put my periods and commas outside of those quotation marks, but proper programming syntax has always taught me to do that - something that actually follows a logical format.
Besides, what is the deal with all the spelling rules and exceptions to the rules and exceptions-to-the-exceptions of the rules? Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. So who the heck cares about spelling? As long as you understand what I'm trying to say isn't that good enough? Or maybe you didn't understand any of what I'm saying because I'm just rambling.
Either way, I'm pretty sure you have all been lamed by English at one time or another. Come on: goose, geese; moose, mooses? Mouse, mice; house, houses? Seriously, what the fork? There are an infinite amount of inconsistencies with English out there, so I won't even bother. Hmm..."won't'...who the heck came up with that instead of "willn't"? The same guy who came up with "isn't it?" Okay, okay, enough about that, already! *mumbles* ...and why isn't there an "amn't" for "am not"...?
If you ask me, English is LAME. I say we all just run away from English. We should all be like Shakespeare and just ignore all and any English rules. Or we could be like St.Boniface who apparently avoid English and make their stop signs say "Arret". But then again, who's asking me? Evidently not the English teacher...and probably not you, either.
Quote of the day: "By the way, in case you were wondering, 'Skip Day' is not a sanctioned absence."
DISCLAIMER: The following is intended for humourous purposes only, and is not meant to offend anybody (or be taken seriously, for that matter). Waste of your time is at your own discretion and not my fault (not that anybody reads this, anyway)! I just thought it would be fun to jokingly rant about something that not serious for a change XD (there are too many brackets! Don't read anything in brackets :P)
We've all heard it before: "i before e, except after c, except when said 'ay' like neighbour and weigh". Yeah...OKAY. Last I checked, I take science courses, not freaking sceince. English is so weird. Or did I mean wierd? Notice how that commonly known rule says "except" twice in itself...English is loaded with exceptions. The rule might as well be "i before e, except when it isn't", because that's just as useful. And isn't "isn't" a stupid word? Apparently contractions like that were made because people were too lazy to say or spell out entire words. Same with abbreviations. I mean why the heck is abbreviation such a freaking long word? Kind of defeats the purpose, no? Why do people come up with ridiculously long words if they end up getting abbreviated or are just never used. I mean who the heck says "honorificabilitudinity" (yes, that is a word: look it up) when they can just say "honorableness"? Some of you out there might be complaining that I forgot the u in "honour" and that I'm not very patriotic for going against Canadian spelling. Well I don't see you dressed up as a maple leaf, wielding a hockey stick, either. I do, in fact, use Canadian spelling most of the time anyway. But more importantly, why are there even different forms of English, anyway? It just adds to the ridiculousness of an already corrupt language. What's with that u? What's du? (haha, ignore the lame calculus reference.)
Anyway that's not the point. Where was I...? Oh yes, "Isn't" is a stupid word. Right. "Isn't" is supposed to be the contraction for "is not", isn't it? Well guess what? The question I just asked there, "isn't it?", just proved itself wrong. If I expanded the contraction I would get "is not it?" which makes no freaking sense. The intended question is actually "is it not?", not "is not it?", yet people use "isn't it?" all the time. Kudos to whoever came up with that one, you have screwed English a little bit further. And I bet all those contractions and quotation marks have confused the crap out of you. Heaven forbid that I put my periods and commas outside of those quotation marks, but proper programming syntax has always taught me to do that - something that actually follows a logical format.
Besides, what is the deal with all the spelling rules and exceptions to the rules and exceptions-to-the-exceptions of the rules? Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. So who the heck cares about spelling? As long as you understand what I'm trying to say isn't that good enough? Or maybe you didn't understand any of what I'm saying because I'm just rambling.
Either way, I'm pretty sure you have all been lamed by English at one time or another. Come on: goose, geese; moose, mooses? Mouse, mice; house, houses? Seriously, what the fork? There are an infinite amount of inconsistencies with English out there, so I won't even bother. Hmm..."won't'...who the heck came up with that instead of "willn't"? The same guy who came up with "isn't it?" Okay, okay, enough about that, already! *mumbles* ...and why isn't there an "amn't" for "am not"...?
If you ask me, English is LAME. I say we all just run away from English. We should all be like Shakespeare and just ignore all and any English rules. Or we could be like St.Boniface who apparently avoid English and make their stop signs say "Arret". But then again, who's asking me? Evidently not the English teacher...and probably not you, either.
Quote of the day: "By the way, in case you were wondering, 'Skip Day' is not a sanctioned absence."