My little Ran-chan...
It's probably good that I've had many hours to take the edge off before making this post.
I'm also getting this out before I read what anyone else has to say.
Like a Senator running for president, I've been writing and rewriting this speech over and over in my head for weeks.
Sometimes it was the "winning" speech, but most of the time it was the "losing" speech.
I was prepared to lose to Remi. Basically I wanted to lose to Remi.
I was not prepared, at all, for Ran-chan.
And so now the evil, evil Powers That Be put me in a position in which a musumeyaku I actually like much more than Remi is becoming the next top musumeyaku of Hanagumi.
But I wanted it to be Remi, I really did, because then I could have a little faith in things following a natural order. It seemed right; more than anything else it just seemed like she was in the right position and that was what ought to happen.
And even if it wasn't Remi, I accepted the unsettling possibility that it might be Amachaki. That girl, to me, outshines many musumeyaku I've seen who have more experience than her. I could kind of imagine her with Matobun -- although maybe that's just the stars in my eyes. But regardless I didn't want it to be her, really, because she's so young and thus her promotion goes against everything I claim to stand for.
So instead, the position goes to her classmate Ran-chan. Two 92nd musumeyaku, both of whom I support through earnest letter-writing.
Add Himeka into the mix and they've got three 92nd musumeyaku being promoted, all in the same troupe.
I don't understand. I one hundred percent, really and truly, don't understand at all what makes this the right choice. Why is such a tiny musumeyaku who's completely new to the troupe better than one who's at least been there for a year.
I don't even know whether I can blame this on Matobun, or just the company.
Having essentially given up on Alice-chan making top, I actually didn't want her to be transferred to Hanagumi -- or anywhere else -- because I feared the backlash. I feared her being thrown into a new environment and me having to divide my loyalties.
So now it's happening to Ran-chan instead. This darling girl I was so impressed with in "The Two Noble Kinsmen" less than year ago... She, the sacrificial lamb.
She's becoming a top star.
Don't tell me anymore to have hope for the plight of musumeyaku. This is it, the final nail in the coffin.
On the one hand I want to cling to the ones I love even more and support them fiercely.
On the other hand, I hate the company so much tonight that I just want to give up and cry and make this awful headache go away.
(I might change this icon later, but for now it accurately expresses my feelings.)
I'm also getting this out before I read what anyone else has to say.
Like a Senator running for president, I've been writing and rewriting this speech over and over in my head for weeks.
Sometimes it was the "winning" speech, but most of the time it was the "losing" speech.
I was prepared to lose to Remi. Basically I wanted to lose to Remi.
I was not prepared, at all, for Ran-chan.
And so now the evil, evil Powers That Be put me in a position in which a musumeyaku I actually like much more than Remi is becoming the next top musumeyaku of Hanagumi.
But I wanted it to be Remi, I really did, because then I could have a little faith in things following a natural order. It seemed right; more than anything else it just seemed like she was in the right position and that was what ought to happen.
And even if it wasn't Remi, I accepted the unsettling possibility that it might be Amachaki. That girl, to me, outshines many musumeyaku I've seen who have more experience than her. I could kind of imagine her with Matobun -- although maybe that's just the stars in my eyes. But regardless I didn't want it to be her, really, because she's so young and thus her promotion goes against everything I claim to stand for.
So instead, the position goes to her classmate Ran-chan. Two 92nd musumeyaku, both of whom I support through earnest letter-writing.
Add Himeka into the mix and they've got three 92nd musumeyaku being promoted, all in the same troupe.
I don't understand. I one hundred percent, really and truly, don't understand at all what makes this the right choice. Why is such a tiny musumeyaku who's completely new to the troupe better than one who's at least been there for a year.
I don't even know whether I can blame this on Matobun, or just the company.
Having essentially given up on Alice-chan making top, I actually didn't want her to be transferred to Hanagumi -- or anywhere else -- because I feared the backlash. I feared her being thrown into a new environment and me having to divide my loyalties.
So now it's happening to Ran-chan instead. This darling girl I was so impressed with in "The Two Noble Kinsmen" less than year ago... She, the sacrificial lamb.
She's becoming a top star.
Don't tell me anymore to have hope for the plight of musumeyaku. This is it, the final nail in the coffin.
On the one hand I want to cling to the ones I love even more and support them fiercely.
On the other hand, I hate the company so much tonight that I just want to give up and cry and make this awful headache go away.
(I might change this icon later, but for now it accurately expresses my feelings.)