for once, this icon is actually relevant
1780 words into the fic I'm working on! I don't really like it that much right now, but fuck that shit I will write it anyway. But first-
MEMES.
zeitheist interviewed me:
1. Shag, marry, cliff: Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles, and Chad Michael Murray.
WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME SOMETHING LIKE THIS, WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU. Whatever happens, I’m marrying Jensen, so he’s safe. (We would buy ugly grandpa jumpers together and then curl up in them to watch America’s Top Model (Jensen insists.)) So then there is the cliff, which I am basing entirely on who I think would be the most likely to survive this fall.
(Indeed, do we get to decide from which cliff we’re doing the pushing? ‘Cause, I can think of a few that I think they’d probably survive.)
On the one hand, Jared is clearly Superman, so if I pushed him off a cliff he might be able to fly and/or catch hold of the rock face as he passes by and thus climb his way to safety. Then again, he is quite bulky and I suspect weighs more than your average giraffe, so possibly he would just go splat before he could sort himself out. Unless he can generate some kind of safety-landing forcefield before he hits the ground, in which case I just have to worry about him battling the giant crabs away. And think we all know Jared can take on a giant crab.
So on the other hand, there is Chad who is clearly not Superman. I wouldn’t bet much on his giant crab capabilities, either. BUT, to his advantage, he is essentially built like a freakishly tall and reasonably muscular twelve-year-old. Boy is SCRAWNY. He could probably pull himself into an elegant dive and slip beneath the water (I am assuming these cliffs are over the sea, by the way) like a well-greased otter whilst Jared’s busy plummeting like the brick shit house that he is.
And of course, once Chad is cutting through the waves like the adorable aquatic mammal of his soul, the giant crabs are pretty much out of the picture. Crabs aren’t really swimmers, are they? They’re more underwater scuttlers. Chad would take gold in that Olympic race.
Assuming the only two competitors in said Olympic race are Chad and a giant crab, anyway.
(I would like to watch that race.)
So in conclusion, Jared can do me, Chad can outswim crabs, and Jensen and I shall sit back to watch it all with a nice cup of cocoa and matching slippers.
2. Through a random series of events possibly involving the Trickster and some inappropriate innuendo, you and a friend end up inside the SPN-universe. What form would your story take? (Bonus question for if you're feeling really brave: Who would you want fandom to 'ship you with?)
FIRST THINGS FIRST, the friend I would take with me would be barthi. Sorry, everyone else, but she’s a fan enough of the show to actually have an idea what’s going on yet not so much a fan that she would just scream and cry when faced with the Winchesters. Also she was a scout. SURVIVAL SKILLS, YO. In case we end up hunting a tent-monster, or something, and we have to camp to lure it in.
Anyway, the form my story would take would be… a really fucking ridiculous one. I think. I mean, if I’m going to be in the SPN universe I might as well go the whole hog. I AM THE MPREG DAUGHTER OF LUCIFER AND CASTIEL, MKAY. Yeah that’s right. Obviously I didn’t know about this until I magically appeared in the ‘verse and discovered I am SOUL-BONDED TO SAM WINCHESTER, HA HA.
But don’t worry guys, I’ll be totally chill about it. I don’t want to come between him and Dean.
So my mission is to hunt down my two gay dads, with the help of the Winchesters and barthi, and make them talk about their feelings and stuff. It’s kind of like The Parent Trap, only with gay celestial sex and also an apocalypse. Oh I know, we can lock them up in the panic room. It’s already demon-proofed and hopefully Bobby will have angel-proofed it as well by now, considering. And I’ll be all ‘DAAADS, YOU HAVE TO TALK IT OUT’ and Sam and Dean are all ‘… what the fuck, let’s go make out.’
IT’LL BE AWESOME.
Knowing this fandom, there would probably be a whole Lucifer/Tree/Castiel movement. That’d be hot. And, what with the soul-bond and all, there would have to be a bit of Tree/Sam as well (and also people going NO YOU CANNOT BREAK UP THE WINCEST LOVE. Hey, guys, don’t worry, I’m totally open to being the meat in a Wincest sandwich.) Obviously, though, obviously the one true romance would be Tree/barthi. It lights my fire when she lights fires. HAHA.
3. What do you never leave the house without?
My housekeys.
Also, a notepad. At least one. Unless I’ve nipped out without a bag, ‘cause I don’t have anything that can fit in a pocket, but I very rarely go anywhere without my bag, so NOTEPAD. I might need to write something down!! (And sometimes I do.) I even took one with me on my birthday, so.
4. What's one story you've always wanted to write, but never have?
LOL okay. When I was twelve, I got majorly into LOTR via the films, but I loved the books too once I’d read them. It was my first real foray into that whole high fantasy genre - and although further literary exploration showed me that I don’t actually like that genre much, LOTR was the exception.
And then, because I was twelve, I decided I wanted to write my own high fantasy series with elves and maps and overly-detailed folklore and whatnot, one that I would actually like! So for the next four years of my life I plotted out this stupid, ridiculously intricate fantasy universe, in which there were indeed elves and maps and languages and a ~special alphabet~ and giant family trees linking all the different generations of the series together and I illustrated portions of it and also, for some reason, it included pirates (female pirates!). Oh, and civil war! And the main character died heroically saving the world from certain doom. THAT KIND OF THING.
It was all so completely ridiculous, but I’m still massively fond of it. A little part of me still wants to write it, even now.
5. You are awesome. How is this so?
I ate a lot of cheese when I was young. Calcium is vital if you want to maintain a high level of awesome.
AND IT KEEPS YOUR BONES STRONG.
*
winterweathered gave me five words:
Tree
CAM, I’M REALLY SORRY! There is no deep or mysterious secret behind Tree to be explained. Not a great deal of thought went into this LJ name. What happened was, back on my old LJ, I went through a super-lame break-up with my then-ex/now-BFF, lapifors (I’m sorry bb but you cannot deny - it was super, super lame) and because I was fifteen I went ‘OH ALAS I can no longer be associated with this LJ! It is too filled with bad memories!’
At this same period in my angsty fifteen-year-old life, I was a big fan of grouphug.us, which was a site for sharing anonymous confessions ranging from truly disturbing to ~profound~. I LIKED THE PROFOUND ONES BEST. One of which read ‘I’m sick of being a human, I want to be a tree.’ It had a nice ring to it, and thus when the time came to jump old LJ ship for the good of my internet soul or whatever, the confession sprung to mind again. (iwanttobeatree had already been taken, which PISSED ME OFF NO END.)
Sooo anyway, I became wanttobeatree and people are lazy schmucks who started calling me plain old ‘Tree’ without all the wanttobea hassle. I embraced it, because I’d never been cool enough for an internet nickname before!
Alternate exciting explanation: my parents are hippies and we live in a tree house in protest against forestry. YEAH THAT’S RIGHT.
Art
I LIKE ART. I’m one of those asshole who’s always been good at it without any kind of real effort. Not in a crazy child art prodigy kind of way, just in a ‘better than everyone else in my class’ kind of way. (Once I’d mastered how to draw squares with angles instead of curves, anyway. That was an awkward period in my childhood.)
Art was a pretty big part of my life right from the get go, which is all very nature vs nurture. My mum used to be really involved in amateur art groups in my town, putting on shows in the local gallery and selling handmade cards at craft fairs and stuff, but that faded into the background a while back when she got all focussed on her career instead. One of my granddads could draw awesome birds and boats, whilst the other did uh-maaaazing watercolours and woodwork, so I never had to want for a crayon or a paintbrush at any point in my childhood.
Weirdly, despite wanting to do basically everything when I was a kid (vet! Astronaut! Formula one racing!), pursuing art professionally never really interested me. Possibly because it was such a part of everyday life to me? Idk. I did sell my A level exam painting, though! Only for £50, but wayheeey, nevertheless. My GCSE art teacher reeeeeally wanted me to do at uni, never mind college, and he spent a lot of time making me paint GIANT PICTURES OF SHOES and stuff, when the other kids in my class were still figuring out how to mix colours. (That may sound a bit mean, but hey, it’s kinda true. A lot of people picked Art at GCSE because they thought it was a skive class.)
I generally went ‘mehhh’ at his career-y prodding, but I did like painting those shoes. And I learnt a lot from him, too! Then he quit teaching and ran away to America to be a stoner hippy with his indie band. Oh yeah, he was one of those art teachers.
I don’t paint anywhere near as much as I used to, since I left college and by extension my art classes, which brings me down a bit. On the other hand, it’s entirely my own fault for not making the time for it! I painted over an old canvas over the Easter holidays, though, so maybe I’ll actually do something with it. If nothing else, there is my tablet - which I’ve resolved to learn how to use properly over the summer - and when I colour with that, I’m essentially pretending it’s watercolour. It’s worked so far.
UK
I kind of love this stupid country.
Actually, I mostly love England. I’ve never really considered myself British, despite how much Gordon Brown wants me to. I have Scottish cousins and they’ve always made it super clear that we are Not Of The Same Nationality, and as we were pretty close when growing up (less so, now) my Englishness was established from an early age.
So yes, I love my country! Or at least, I love its physical landmass and cultural quirks. I’m not in the least bit patriotic when it comes to the government, because every single party is composed of corrupt assholes. SIGH. But, even now, in these times of economic crisis and stupid politicians and meteorological disarray, I can’t imagine ever wanting to renounce my citizenship. My family came over with the Norman conquest! NOTHING SHALL TURN US AWAY. (Unless Boris Johnson becomes PM, anyway. I think that could be it for me.)
I like to think I’ll live overseas one day, especially in Vancouver, but honestly I’m not sure I could manage it without pining something terrible. Last summer, I went to stay with a couple in friends in Oregon (what up, rdlenix!) and Victoria BC, and by the end of the three weeks I was going a little crazy with the need for some proper RAIN. So possibly I will never cut it as an overseas citizen.
Unicorns
I love unicorns! It’s mostly in an ironic, post-modern kind of way, in that I just find unicorns inherently hilarious - especially when applied to things like Dean Winchester. Oh the contrast! The incongruity! &c.
However, when I was little, my love for them was completely unironic. I would have gladly watched The Last Unicorn every day if my parents had let me (which they did not, and when the obsession finally seemed like it was waning they quietly taped over it) and I had this sparkly eighties’ Barbie horse which I insisted was a unicorn with its horn missing. I may have tried to construct a new horn for it out of pipe cleaners and glitter.
Also, my brother has this adorable little baby My Little Pony unicorn (yeah that’s right, he did, and now the internet knows all about it) and he would make me do all sorts of weird shit in exchange for letting me play with it. Seeing if I would fit into the laundry hamper (bonus points if we can close the lid!) was a pretty prominent feature of my childhood.
But now, that childhood, laundry hampered innocence has passed away, leaving me all cynical about my unicorns. They’re FUNNY! Supernatural + sparkly unicorns = hilarious. Chad Michael Murray + sparkly unicorns = hilarious. Anything mundane (or, in SPN’s case, rife with tears and tragedy) + a unicorn = automatic comedy.
I AM VERY EASILY AMUSED.
Cyclops
Many months ago, at the UK Winchester fangirl meet-up, lazy_daze attempted to draw Jared’s pretty, pretty eyes (sunflowers against a blue sky!) and ended up with this. Which I then stole and turned into a cyclops!Jared, though there aren’t any photos of it alas, and then - because I was sat next to credulesque and opposite theoret, who are both bad people who encourage me to do these things - I spent the rest of the day just DRAWING CYCLOPSES.
Like I said above, I just find this kind of shit funny! So easily amused. Especially when the idea of cyclops!Sam (it became Sam rather than Jared somewhere along the way. Possibly because Sam is so angsty) distressed fleshflutter so thoroughly. And then it SNOWBALLED and became a THING and now I shall forever be associated with cyclopses and unicorns.
And maybe cyclops unicorns.
OHHH I THINK I HEAR THUNDER.
MEMES.
zeitheist interviewed me:
1. Shag, marry, cliff: Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles, and Chad Michael Murray.
WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME SOMETHING LIKE THIS, WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU. Whatever happens, I’m marrying Jensen, so he’s safe. (We would buy ugly grandpa jumpers together and then curl up in them to watch America’s Top Model (Jensen insists.)) So then there is the cliff, which I am basing entirely on who I think would be the most likely to survive this fall.
(Indeed, do we get to decide from which cliff we’re doing the pushing? ‘Cause, I can think of a few that I think they’d probably survive.)
On the one hand, Jared is clearly Superman, so if I pushed him off a cliff he might be able to fly and/or catch hold of the rock face as he passes by and thus climb his way to safety. Then again, he is quite bulky and I suspect weighs more than your average giraffe, so possibly he would just go splat before he could sort himself out. Unless he can generate some kind of safety-landing forcefield before he hits the ground, in which case I just have to worry about him battling the giant crabs away. And think we all know Jared can take on a giant crab.
So on the other hand, there is Chad who is clearly not Superman. I wouldn’t bet much on his giant crab capabilities, either. BUT, to his advantage, he is essentially built like a freakishly tall and reasonably muscular twelve-year-old. Boy is SCRAWNY. He could probably pull himself into an elegant dive and slip beneath the water (I am assuming these cliffs are over the sea, by the way) like a well-greased otter whilst Jared’s busy plummeting like the brick shit house that he is.
And of course, once Chad is cutting through the waves like the adorable aquatic mammal of his soul, the giant crabs are pretty much out of the picture. Crabs aren’t really swimmers, are they? They’re more underwater scuttlers. Chad would take gold in that Olympic race.
Assuming the only two competitors in said Olympic race are Chad and a giant crab, anyway.
(I would like to watch that race.)
So in conclusion, Jared can do me, Chad can outswim crabs, and Jensen and I shall sit back to watch it all with a nice cup of cocoa and matching slippers.
2. Through a random series of events possibly involving the Trickster and some inappropriate innuendo, you and a friend end up inside the SPN-universe. What form would your story take? (Bonus question for if you're feeling really brave: Who would you want fandom to 'ship you with?)
FIRST THINGS FIRST, the friend I would take with me would be barthi. Sorry, everyone else, but she’s a fan enough of the show to actually have an idea what’s going on yet not so much a fan that she would just scream and cry when faced with the Winchesters. Also she was a scout. SURVIVAL SKILLS, YO. In case we end up hunting a tent-monster, or something, and we have to camp to lure it in.
Anyway, the form my story would take would be… a really fucking ridiculous one. I think. I mean, if I’m going to be in the SPN universe I might as well go the whole hog. I AM THE MPREG DAUGHTER OF LUCIFER AND CASTIEL, MKAY. Yeah that’s right. Obviously I didn’t know about this until I magically appeared in the ‘verse and discovered I am SOUL-BONDED TO SAM WINCHESTER, HA HA.
But don’t worry guys, I’ll be totally chill about it. I don’t want to come between him and Dean.
So my mission is to hunt down my two gay dads, with the help of the Winchesters and barthi, and make them talk about their feelings and stuff. It’s kind of like The Parent Trap, only with gay celestial sex and also an apocalypse. Oh I know, we can lock them up in the panic room. It’s already demon-proofed and hopefully Bobby will have angel-proofed it as well by now, considering. And I’ll be all ‘DAAADS, YOU HAVE TO TALK IT OUT’ and Sam and Dean are all ‘… what the fuck, let’s go make out.’
IT’LL BE AWESOME.
Knowing this fandom, there would probably be a whole Lucifer/Tree/Castiel movement. That’d be hot. And, what with the soul-bond and all, there would have to be a bit of Tree/Sam as well (and also people going NO YOU CANNOT BREAK UP THE WINCEST LOVE. Hey, guys, don’t worry, I’m totally open to being the meat in a Wincest sandwich.) Obviously, though, obviously the one true romance would be Tree/barthi. It lights my fire when she lights fires. HAHA.
3. What do you never leave the house without?
My housekeys.
Also, a notepad. At least one. Unless I’ve nipped out without a bag, ‘cause I don’t have anything that can fit in a pocket, but I very rarely go anywhere without my bag, so NOTEPAD. I might need to write something down!! (And sometimes I do.) I even took one with me on my birthday, so.
4. What's one story you've always wanted to write, but never have?
LOL okay. When I was twelve, I got majorly into LOTR via the films, but I loved the books too once I’d read them. It was my first real foray into that whole high fantasy genre - and although further literary exploration showed me that I don’t actually like that genre much, LOTR was the exception.
And then, because I was twelve, I decided I wanted to write my own high fantasy series with elves and maps and overly-detailed folklore and whatnot, one that I would actually like! So for the next four years of my life I plotted out this stupid, ridiculously intricate fantasy universe, in which there were indeed elves and maps and languages and a ~special alphabet~ and giant family trees linking all the different generations of the series together and I illustrated portions of it and also, for some reason, it included pirates (female pirates!). Oh, and civil war! And the main character died heroically saving the world from certain doom. THAT KIND OF THING.
It was all so completely ridiculous, but I’m still massively fond of it. A little part of me still wants to write it, even now.
5. You are awesome. How is this so?
I ate a lot of cheese when I was young. Calcium is vital if you want to maintain a high level of awesome.
AND IT KEEPS YOUR BONES STRONG.
*
winterweathered gave me five words:
Tree
CAM, I’M REALLY SORRY! There is no deep or mysterious secret behind Tree to be explained. Not a great deal of thought went into this LJ name. What happened was, back on my old LJ, I went through a super-lame break-up with my then-ex/now-BFF, lapifors (I’m sorry bb but you cannot deny - it was super, super lame) and because I was fifteen I went ‘OH ALAS I can no longer be associated with this LJ! It is too filled with bad memories!’
At this same period in my angsty fifteen-year-old life, I was a big fan of grouphug.us, which was a site for sharing anonymous confessions ranging from truly disturbing to ~profound~. I LIKED THE PROFOUND ONES BEST. One of which read ‘I’m sick of being a human, I want to be a tree.’ It had a nice ring to it, and thus when the time came to jump old LJ ship for the good of my internet soul or whatever, the confession sprung to mind again. (iwanttobeatree had already been taken, which PISSED ME OFF NO END.)
Sooo anyway, I became wanttobeatree and people are lazy schmucks who started calling me plain old ‘Tree’ without all the wanttobea hassle. I embraced it, because I’d never been cool enough for an internet nickname before!
Alternate exciting explanation: my parents are hippies and we live in a tree house in protest against forestry. YEAH THAT’S RIGHT.
Art
I LIKE ART. I’m one of those asshole who’s always been good at it without any kind of real effort. Not in a crazy child art prodigy kind of way, just in a ‘better than everyone else in my class’ kind of way. (Once I’d mastered how to draw squares with angles instead of curves, anyway. That was an awkward period in my childhood.)
Art was a pretty big part of my life right from the get go, which is all very nature vs nurture. My mum used to be really involved in amateur art groups in my town, putting on shows in the local gallery and selling handmade cards at craft fairs and stuff, but that faded into the background a while back when she got all focussed on her career instead. One of my granddads could draw awesome birds and boats, whilst the other did uh-maaaazing watercolours and woodwork, so I never had to want for a crayon or a paintbrush at any point in my childhood.
Weirdly, despite wanting to do basically everything when I was a kid (vet! Astronaut! Formula one racing!), pursuing art professionally never really interested me. Possibly because it was such a part of everyday life to me? Idk. I did sell my A level exam painting, though! Only for £50, but wayheeey, nevertheless. My GCSE art teacher reeeeeally wanted me to do at uni, never mind college, and he spent a lot of time making me paint GIANT PICTURES OF SHOES and stuff, when the other kids in my class were still figuring out how to mix colours. (That may sound a bit mean, but hey, it’s kinda true. A lot of people picked Art at GCSE because they thought it was a skive class.)
I generally went ‘mehhh’ at his career-y prodding, but I did like painting those shoes. And I learnt a lot from him, too! Then he quit teaching and ran away to America to be a stoner hippy with his indie band. Oh yeah, he was one of those art teachers.
I don’t paint anywhere near as much as I used to, since I left college and by extension my art classes, which brings me down a bit. On the other hand, it’s entirely my own fault for not making the time for it! I painted over an old canvas over the Easter holidays, though, so maybe I’ll actually do something with it. If nothing else, there is my tablet - which I’ve resolved to learn how to use properly over the summer - and when I colour with that, I’m essentially pretending it’s watercolour. It’s worked so far.
UK
I kind of love this stupid country.
Actually, I mostly love England. I’ve never really considered myself British, despite how much Gordon Brown wants me to. I have Scottish cousins and they’ve always made it super clear that we are Not Of The Same Nationality, and as we were pretty close when growing up (less so, now) my Englishness was established from an early age.
So yes, I love my country! Or at least, I love its physical landmass and cultural quirks. I’m not in the least bit patriotic when it comes to the government, because every single party is composed of corrupt assholes. SIGH. But, even now, in these times of economic crisis and stupid politicians and meteorological disarray, I can’t imagine ever wanting to renounce my citizenship. My family came over with the Norman conquest! NOTHING SHALL TURN US AWAY. (Unless Boris Johnson becomes PM, anyway. I think that could be it for me.)
I like to think I’ll live overseas one day, especially in Vancouver, but honestly I’m not sure I could manage it without pining something terrible. Last summer, I went to stay with a couple in friends in Oregon (what up, rdlenix!) and Victoria BC, and by the end of the three weeks I was going a little crazy with the need for some proper RAIN. So possibly I will never cut it as an overseas citizen.
Unicorns
I love unicorns! It’s mostly in an ironic, post-modern kind of way, in that I just find unicorns inherently hilarious - especially when applied to things like Dean Winchester. Oh the contrast! The incongruity! &c.
However, when I was little, my love for them was completely unironic. I would have gladly watched The Last Unicorn every day if my parents had let me (which they did not, and when the obsession finally seemed like it was waning they quietly taped over it) and I had this sparkly eighties’ Barbie horse which I insisted was a unicorn with its horn missing. I may have tried to construct a new horn for it out of pipe cleaners and glitter.
Also, my brother has this adorable little baby My Little Pony unicorn (yeah that’s right, he did, and now the internet knows all about it) and he would make me do all sorts of weird shit in exchange for letting me play with it. Seeing if I would fit into the laundry hamper (bonus points if we can close the lid!) was a pretty prominent feature of my childhood.
But now, that childhood, laundry hampered innocence has passed away, leaving me all cynical about my unicorns. They’re FUNNY! Supernatural + sparkly unicorns = hilarious. Chad Michael Murray + sparkly unicorns = hilarious. Anything mundane (or, in SPN’s case, rife with tears and tragedy) + a unicorn = automatic comedy.
I AM VERY EASILY AMUSED.
Cyclops
Many months ago, at the UK Winchester fangirl meet-up, lazy_daze attempted to draw Jared’s pretty, pretty eyes (sunflowers against a blue sky!) and ended up with this. Which I then stole and turned into a cyclops!Jared, though there aren’t any photos of it alas, and then - because I was sat next to credulesque and opposite theoret, who are both bad people who encourage me to do these things - I spent the rest of the day just DRAWING CYCLOPSES.
Like I said above, I just find this kind of shit funny! So easily amused. Especially when the idea of cyclops!Sam (it became Sam rather than Jared somewhere along the way. Possibly because Sam is so angsty) distressed fleshflutter so thoroughly. And then it SNOWBALLED and became a THING and now I shall forever be associated with cyclopses and unicorns.
And maybe cyclops unicorns.
OHHH I THINK I HEAR THUNDER.