(no subject)
all i want is for someone to be online that i can talk to. i just want to talk to someone. i'm not doing okay. this is the first time in a long time that i've thought about cutting. i don't need that though. i've got god. i'm not strong though. satan eats me alive. tearing every piece of flesh into pieces. knocking me down where i am weak. he is looking for past scars and is openening them up again. i hate knowing that other people know i'm weak. i hide it from people especially those i love. i want to think i'm awesome. more than ever their opinions mean more than anything to me that's why i hide. i've done this many times before. this time i'm letting you all know i'm weak. when emotional stress gets to me i can't handle it. i'm afraid to tell you what happened tonight. afraid of what you may think. afraid that someone will read it and what they will think. so i will not tell you. i will keep it wrapped inside and let it eat me inside out. i bet this is making no sence to you... well neither is it to me. i just can't get my thoughts straight. i will write tomorrow when things are clear. goodnight my friends. sweet dreams.