Summer
Summer is here. I'm getting bored already. I'm used to being around friends every night, and so far I haven't gotten used to sitting around at home. The stupid thing is that I was invited to Pecadillo's by two different people tonight, and said I'm too tired, which is true. I'm tired as hell, but I should just forget about stuff and go. I guess I'm afraid I won't feel right because I'll be with people I'm friends with, but not most of the friends that I've spent the last 8 months with. Aaron's still in town so thank God for that.
This whole summer is going to be like that though, so I better just get used to it. I mean, I'm not doubting that I'll have some awesome times with my friends that are in town, but I just don't think it will be the same as if Ed, Ken, Shawn, Tom, Amanda, Christine, Meghan, and others were still up here in Erie. And Tom's not even coming back ever, so that sucks.
Then there's love. Who know what's going on there? It's what we live for, what we die for, but no one seems to know what it is. Does anyone else see a problem with this?!
Man, I'm so glad to be done with all the work from classes, but I don't like feeling lonely. I've turned into a very social person, I think, over the past couple years. I used to be really really shy, but that's changed- for better or for worse. Now I need to be loved, and I need attention. I'm afraid I'm going jump into another relationship too soon, and end up hurting someone, whether it's me, some new girl, or worst of all Mary. I don't know when I'm going to be ready to date again. I might be ready now. How am I suppsoed to know?
I'm also afraid that my ego has grown way to big lately because of things such as the things I'm about to write. I think I'm a great guy... a keeper. I think I treated Mary very well, and I don't get why she just lost that love for me. I guess the whole High School/College separation played a big part in it. God knows I tried to keep things happy and spontaneous and exciting, so I don't know what happened. Se la vie, se l'amour.
Summer used to be the thing Iooked forward to. A break from school that I can spend as much time with friends, and girlfriend, as I want.
Now my friends are gone, I broke up with my girlfriend, and I'm working everyday. After work, I'm usually too tired or too pissed off to do anything fun.
Growing up is so awesome. -_-
This whole summer is going to be like that though, so I better just get used to it. I mean, I'm not doubting that I'll have some awesome times with my friends that are in town, but I just don't think it will be the same as if Ed, Ken, Shawn, Tom, Amanda, Christine, Meghan, and others were still up here in Erie. And Tom's not even coming back ever, so that sucks.
Then there's love. Who know what's going on there? It's what we live for, what we die for, but no one seems to know what it is. Does anyone else see a problem with this?!
Man, I'm so glad to be done with all the work from classes, but I don't like feeling lonely. I've turned into a very social person, I think, over the past couple years. I used to be really really shy, but that's changed- for better or for worse. Now I need to be loved, and I need attention. I'm afraid I'm going jump into another relationship too soon, and end up hurting someone, whether it's me, some new girl, or worst of all Mary. I don't know when I'm going to be ready to date again. I might be ready now. How am I suppsoed to know?
I'm also afraid that my ego has grown way to big lately because of things such as the things I'm about to write. I think I'm a great guy... a keeper. I think I treated Mary very well, and I don't get why she just lost that love for me. I guess the whole High School/College separation played a big part in it. God knows I tried to keep things happy and spontaneous and exciting, so I don't know what happened. Se la vie, se l'amour.
Summer used to be the thing Iooked forward to. A break from school that I can spend as much time with friends, and girlfriend, as I want.
Now my friends are gone, I broke up with my girlfriend, and I'm working everyday. After work, I'm usually too tired or too pissed off to do anything fun.
Growing up is so awesome. -_-