Lounging on the Bed of Blue sipping Four Red Berry tea....
I'm supposed to be studying my notes for my Spanish test tomorrow. I really can't make my mind cement and ground though. So many of my thoughts swirl around the application of London now. All the plans that we're if's because choices already made. The possible train tracks lock to their directions and cross other ideas and second plans away.
I won't need an apartment of my own till January comes now, though I'm grateful to know which I'll move to already. I need to contract someone about having a place in the spring when I return. I, also, need to start researching storage places since that’s where my house load worth of things will be while I'm gone. But that leaves me completely uncertain of where I'll live the month between the end of my lease with Christine and my semester beginning in London.
Within the next month or two I need to purchase my round trip ticket for Samhain in October. Gramma's outstanding early Christmas present will be called in once orientation to this program reveals all it's secrets to me. I have to wait in large part still for that FAFSA response now, so I'll know how much I'm getting in federal aide and how much I'm taking in loans. I refuse, here and now, to scrape by in London for anything; food, study, or fun. It will be worth the trouble in the long run.
And Billy. How do I cover that in words. In the eight months we've known each other (only the last three of them together) the longest we've been apart is four days. It would quickly jump to two and half months twice, with one short trip in the center of them (3/4th of which he wouldn't be present for because it's my religious retreat). I already jokingly told him I'd have to get a web cam and he jokingly told me I'd have to call a lot. And some of it is joking. And some of it really isn't, even if it's laced with laughter. We manage, shaken a little by the tugging stings of our ebullient futures, wanting not to hold each other back or be misplaced/forgotten by these great chances presenting themselves.
.....this is not studying.
And David is talking to me, but not talking to me directly, which is even more important in the talking right now. Which distracts me from all things even related to any of this. My haven. My sword. My always. The triple heart beats of my being that will never leave either the set up near my bed or my heart. Even as I learn my way to be myself by myself.
love to you all
Krino e Elo
I won't need an apartment of my own till January comes now, though I'm grateful to know which I'll move to already. I need to contract someone about having a place in the spring when I return. I, also, need to start researching storage places since that’s where my house load worth of things will be while I'm gone. But that leaves me completely uncertain of where I'll live the month between the end of my lease with Christine and my semester beginning in London.
Within the next month or two I need to purchase my round trip ticket for Samhain in October. Gramma's outstanding early Christmas present will be called in once orientation to this program reveals all it's secrets to me. I have to wait in large part still for that FAFSA response now, so I'll know how much I'm getting in federal aide and how much I'm taking in loans. I refuse, here and now, to scrape by in London for anything; food, study, or fun. It will be worth the trouble in the long run.
And Billy. How do I cover that in words. In the eight months we've known each other (only the last three of them together) the longest we've been apart is four days. It would quickly jump to two and half months twice, with one short trip in the center of them (3/4th of which he wouldn't be present for because it's my religious retreat). I already jokingly told him I'd have to get a web cam and he jokingly told me I'd have to call a lot. And some of it is joking. And some of it really isn't, even if it's laced with laughter. We manage, shaken a little by the tugging stings of our ebullient futures, wanting not to hold each other back or be misplaced/forgotten by these great chances presenting themselves.
.....this is not studying.
And David is talking to me, but not talking to me directly, which is even more important in the talking right now. Which distracts me from all things even related to any of this. My haven. My sword. My always. The triple heart beats of my being that will never leave either the set up near my bed or my heart. Even as I learn my way to be myself by myself.
love to you all
Krino e Elo