Untitled Glompfest Christmas stocking post from a gazillion years ago
This is old *like Christmas 2011 old* but I'm sticking it here for reasons.
Merlin/Arthur with a side of Gwen/Lance, Leon/A Broken Heart, Leon/Elena
Rated like, PG, mebbe? I haven't tried to rate anything in a long time.
"Another scotch?" Merlin asks, and picks up the bottle.
Leon shakes his head, knowing that Arthur is eying the amber liquid left in the decanter and calculating how long it will be before they have to break into the good stuff, the thirty-two year old Glenlivet his father had given each of this upper level executives last Christmas, and which is probably hiding in the very back of his and Merlin's kitchen cabinets for the opportune moment.
Leon's broken heart is not that moment.
"I tried to tell you," Arthur says, and even though Merlin shoots him a look that says, "Not now, you pillock," Arthur barrels onward. "The woman thinks herself an absolute Disney princess, just waiting for her true love's kiss. And while she's waiting for it she leaves a trail of perfectly good men in her wake."
"Not. Helping," Merlin hisses, and pours Leon another three fingers. Leon eyes the tumbler warily.
"If I drink that I'll have to sleep on your sofa tonight," he warns them. Arthur looks pained at this, because he hates having anyone stay over, but Merlin just grins.
"We have blankets and pillows, and our sofa is incredibly comfy," Merlin nudges the tumbler closer to Leon's elbow.
Leon knows it's a bad idea- while the Scotch isn't so cheap that it will give him cotton mouth and a pressing need to dry-swallow parcetamol in the morning, he will have to put up with Arthur press-ganging Merlin into having extremely noisy sex with him as a warning to Leon not to do this again. Besides, Arthur did try and tell Leon about Viv.
At the thought of her he picks up the glass and tilts his head back.
Merlin pats Leon's shoulder and stands. "I'll get the blankets and a pillow. Your toothbrush is under the sink."
*~*~*~*~*
"You are the worst best mate ever," Leon tells Arthur the next morning. Arthur grins and scratches at his stomach, right at the waistband of his worn boxer shorts. Bastard didn't even bother to put on a shirt.
"Yet you made me coffee."
"That's not for you, that's for Merlin. I figured he would need it after you kept him up all night."
Arthur pours himself a cup of coffee and leans against the kitchen counter. He cups the mug in both hands and breathes in deep. "I curse the day I decided to rebel against my tea drinking father by pouring myself a cup of this garbage. Tea tastes so much better but it just doesn't get me going anymore."
Merlin ambles in then, and he at least has enough decorum to throw on a pair of track pants and a tee shirt. "You didn't start drinking coffee to rebel against your father," he points out. "You did it to impress me."
"I only have two motivations in life," Arthur says with a shrug. He hands the mug to Merlin before kissing his temple. "I figured the odds were in my favor."
"And that is why I refuse to let him gamble," Merlin says, and takes a seat at the kitchen table across from Leon. "We'd be homeless. Did you sleep well?"
"I heard a few things go bump in the night," Leon says, and it's gratifying to see a blush spread across Merlin's cheekbones, even if Arthur appears unconcerned as he pours himself another coffee. "But other than that I slept fine."
Merlin beams at him. "See, Arthur, I told you it was worth it to go back to the store three times to try out that sofa before we bought it to be one hundred percent sure it was comfortable."
Leon tunes them out when Arthur starts to splutter. He's heard this argument plenty of times before. He only looks up when Merlin's phone lets out its text-chime and cuts Arthur off mid-'the things I do for you'-stride.
"Looks like Gwen and Lance were up all night doing broken heart duty with Ellie." Merlin's phone chimes again as more text messages come in in rapid succession. "She's taking the two of them to brunch to say thank you and they invited us along to share in the misery."
There's an awkward pause as Merlin thinks back over what he just said. "Not that helping a friend work their way through a broken heart is a bad thing," he says, while Arthur doubles over with laughter. "Ellie's a special case. Great girl, terrible taste in men. She pined after Gwaine for years."
"It was terrible," Arthur confirms.
"You'll want to go out with your friends," Leon says, starting to stand so he can put his coffee mug in the sink and be on his way.
"Nonsense," Merlin says. "I already told Gwen that the three of us would meet them. Arthur, go find a shirt he can borrow from you."
*~*~*~*~*
"So the guy that Elena just broke up with," Arthur says while they're on the train, "kept a snake for a pet. That should have been her first clue. Who does that?"
"Herpetologists?" Leon suggests, but Arthur just shakes his head.
"That's disgusting. Elena's a fantastic woman, smart, funny, and she's a huge footie fan. She could drink us both under the table when we were in uni. Our dads used to think we might marry when we were younger, but obviously..."
"You rebelled against your father and tried to impress me, all in one go," Merlin says, and Arthur tugs him close.
Leon watches them make googly eyes at each other and sighs. He's been friends with them for a long time, ever since he beat Arthur out for a captaincy on their uni football team and Arthur had thrown a snit, then come and apologised to Leon while Merlin propelled him forward with just a look. Leon wants what they have, has looked for that kind of love and devotion and silliness and anger and forgiveness in every woman he's dated, only to come up empty handed.
He follows Merlin and Arthur off the train and up the stairs to the street, still lost in thought and self-doubt. Merlin waves when he sees someone he recognises, and Leon's eyes are drawn to the group. His eyes widen in surprise when he sees Gwen, who he used to know when they were children. She's standing with a man who's obviously Lance, judging by the way he's making googly eyes of his own at her.
But his eyes are really drawn to the blonde woman with the flyaway curls, who's about to have her purse snatched.
Leon sees the man make his move, reaching out for the bag that's hanging loosely from the woman's hand and he doesn't think, just leaps forward and tackles the man to the ground, right as his hand tugs on the strap of the purse.
There are several shouts of "Leon!" and "Omigod!" and "Ellie, are you okay?" but the one that Leon hears most clearly is "Fecking hell! I get rescued like a damsel in distress and it turns out my knight's wearing shining armor masquerading as an Arsenal jersey."
Arthur laughs so hard that he loosens the grip he had taken on the would be purse snatcher, letting the man push through the crowd and get away.
*~*~*~*~*
"And that," Merlin says, holding a glass of champagne in one hand and a microphone in the other, "Is why I am the best man instead of Arthur. To Leon and Elena."
Merlin/Arthur with a side of Gwen/Lance, Leon/A Broken Heart, Leon/Elena
Rated like, PG, mebbe? I haven't tried to rate anything in a long time.
"Another scotch?" Merlin asks, and picks up the bottle.
Leon shakes his head, knowing that Arthur is eying the amber liquid left in the decanter and calculating how long it will be before they have to break into the good stuff, the thirty-two year old Glenlivet his father had given each of this upper level executives last Christmas, and which is probably hiding in the very back of his and Merlin's kitchen cabinets for the opportune moment.
Leon's broken heart is not that moment.
"I tried to tell you," Arthur says, and even though Merlin shoots him a look that says, "Not now, you pillock," Arthur barrels onward. "The woman thinks herself an absolute Disney princess, just waiting for her true love's kiss. And while she's waiting for it she leaves a trail of perfectly good men in her wake."
"Not. Helping," Merlin hisses, and pours Leon another three fingers. Leon eyes the tumbler warily.
"If I drink that I'll have to sleep on your sofa tonight," he warns them. Arthur looks pained at this, because he hates having anyone stay over, but Merlin just grins.
"We have blankets and pillows, and our sofa is incredibly comfy," Merlin nudges the tumbler closer to Leon's elbow.
Leon knows it's a bad idea- while the Scotch isn't so cheap that it will give him cotton mouth and a pressing need to dry-swallow parcetamol in the morning, he will have to put up with Arthur press-ganging Merlin into having extremely noisy sex with him as a warning to Leon not to do this again. Besides, Arthur did try and tell Leon about Viv.
At the thought of her he picks up the glass and tilts his head back.
Merlin pats Leon's shoulder and stands. "I'll get the blankets and a pillow. Your toothbrush is under the sink."
*~*~*~*~*
"You are the worst best mate ever," Leon tells Arthur the next morning. Arthur grins and scratches at his stomach, right at the waistband of his worn boxer shorts. Bastard didn't even bother to put on a shirt.
"Yet you made me coffee."
"That's not for you, that's for Merlin. I figured he would need it after you kept him up all night."
Arthur pours himself a cup of coffee and leans against the kitchen counter. He cups the mug in both hands and breathes in deep. "I curse the day I decided to rebel against my tea drinking father by pouring myself a cup of this garbage. Tea tastes so much better but it just doesn't get me going anymore."
Merlin ambles in then, and he at least has enough decorum to throw on a pair of track pants and a tee shirt. "You didn't start drinking coffee to rebel against your father," he points out. "You did it to impress me."
"I only have two motivations in life," Arthur says with a shrug. He hands the mug to Merlin before kissing his temple. "I figured the odds were in my favor."
"And that is why I refuse to let him gamble," Merlin says, and takes a seat at the kitchen table across from Leon. "We'd be homeless. Did you sleep well?"
"I heard a few things go bump in the night," Leon says, and it's gratifying to see a blush spread across Merlin's cheekbones, even if Arthur appears unconcerned as he pours himself another coffee. "But other than that I slept fine."
Merlin beams at him. "See, Arthur, I told you it was worth it to go back to the store three times to try out that sofa before we bought it to be one hundred percent sure it was comfortable."
Leon tunes them out when Arthur starts to splutter. He's heard this argument plenty of times before. He only looks up when Merlin's phone lets out its text-chime and cuts Arthur off mid-'the things I do for you'-stride.
"Looks like Gwen and Lance were up all night doing broken heart duty with Ellie." Merlin's phone chimes again as more text messages come in in rapid succession. "She's taking the two of them to brunch to say thank you and they invited us along to share in the misery."
There's an awkward pause as Merlin thinks back over what he just said. "Not that helping a friend work their way through a broken heart is a bad thing," he says, while Arthur doubles over with laughter. "Ellie's a special case. Great girl, terrible taste in men. She pined after Gwaine for years."
"It was terrible," Arthur confirms.
"You'll want to go out with your friends," Leon says, starting to stand so he can put his coffee mug in the sink and be on his way.
"Nonsense," Merlin says. "I already told Gwen that the three of us would meet them. Arthur, go find a shirt he can borrow from you."
*~*~*~*~*
"So the guy that Elena just broke up with," Arthur says while they're on the train, "kept a snake for a pet. That should have been her first clue. Who does that?"
"Herpetologists?" Leon suggests, but Arthur just shakes his head.
"That's disgusting. Elena's a fantastic woman, smart, funny, and she's a huge footie fan. She could drink us both under the table when we were in uni. Our dads used to think we might marry when we were younger, but obviously..."
"You rebelled against your father and tried to impress me, all in one go," Merlin says, and Arthur tugs him close.
Leon watches them make googly eyes at each other and sighs. He's been friends with them for a long time, ever since he beat Arthur out for a captaincy on their uni football team and Arthur had thrown a snit, then come and apologised to Leon while Merlin propelled him forward with just a look. Leon wants what they have, has looked for that kind of love and devotion and silliness and anger and forgiveness in every woman he's dated, only to come up empty handed.
He follows Merlin and Arthur off the train and up the stairs to the street, still lost in thought and self-doubt. Merlin waves when he sees someone he recognises, and Leon's eyes are drawn to the group. His eyes widen in surprise when he sees Gwen, who he used to know when they were children. She's standing with a man who's obviously Lance, judging by the way he's making googly eyes of his own at her.
But his eyes are really drawn to the blonde woman with the flyaway curls, who's about to have her purse snatched.
Leon sees the man make his move, reaching out for the bag that's hanging loosely from the woman's hand and he doesn't think, just leaps forward and tackles the man to the ground, right as his hand tugs on the strap of the purse.
There are several shouts of "Leon!" and "Omigod!" and "Ellie, are you okay?" but the one that Leon hears most clearly is "Fecking hell! I get rescued like a damsel in distress and it turns out my knight's wearing shining armor masquerading as an Arsenal jersey."
Arthur laughs so hard that he loosens the grip he had taken on the would be purse snatcher, letting the man push through the crowd and get away.
*~*~*~*~*
"And that," Merlin says, holding a glass of champagne in one hand and a microphone in the other, "Is why I am the best man instead of Arthur. To Leon and Elena."