(no subject)
Confidence seems to have reached an all time low.
So I got a message today from what amounts to my best friend in this god forsaken state, who I have yet to meet in person, as pathetic as that is. Anyway, I was busy hanging out with my father before he left to go back to DC, when she IM'd me, leaving me her cell phone #
So despite my dire need for human company, and just to laugh face to face with friends around, I found myself having a lot of difficulty trying to
muster up the courage to make the call. By the time I did, there was no answer, I assume because she was already out partying. But I had
already overcome that barrier, so I figured I may as well go out, knowing that when she was in Clearwater, Shepherd's is her hang-out of choice.
So I decided to go hoping I might see her. I may have, I'm sure I'll find out tomorrow, but regardless, despite all the liquid courage I ingested, I
couldn't muster the nerve to even say a word to anyone.
Anyway, I'm really to drunk right now to write anything meaningful, or insightful, or even to really explain how I feel. I just wanted to post to
myself a message to remind me to have more confidence. Because A) I could have gotten to hang out with someone who's actually a friend,
which has been a while. B) A pretty girl was sitting by herself for most of the time I was there. I know I should have gone and said something
not even out of hitting on her intentions, but just because she looked like she could use the conversation as much as me.
But, I didn't do either.
Instead I'm drunk by myself, again. Wondering if I still have the ability to talk to people anymore.
So I got a message today from what amounts to my best friend in this god forsaken state, who I have yet to meet in person, as pathetic as that is. Anyway, I was busy hanging out with my father before he left to go back to DC, when she IM'd me, leaving me her cell phone #
So despite my dire need for human company, and just to laugh face to face with friends around, I found myself having a lot of difficulty trying to
muster up the courage to make the call. By the time I did, there was no answer, I assume because she was already out partying. But I had
already overcome that barrier, so I figured I may as well go out, knowing that when she was in Clearwater, Shepherd's is her hang-out of choice.
So I decided to go hoping I might see her. I may have, I'm sure I'll find out tomorrow, but regardless, despite all the liquid courage I ingested, I
couldn't muster the nerve to even say a word to anyone.
Anyway, I'm really to drunk right now to write anything meaningful, or insightful, or even to really explain how I feel. I just wanted to post to
myself a message to remind me to have more confidence. Because A) I could have gotten to hang out with someone who's actually a friend,
which has been a while. B) A pretty girl was sitting by herself for most of the time I was there. I know I should have gone and said something
not even out of hitting on her intentions, but just because she looked like she could use the conversation as much as me.
But, I didn't do either.
Instead I'm drunk by myself, again. Wondering if I still have the ability to talk to people anymore.