Darkness When You Thought it was Dawn
Some things we change... but more often things change us. Simple enough statement, not so simple to live with.
When I was a kid I had a hard time relating to the opposite sex. Most girls in elementary school treated me like I had the plague...I might as well have, because everybody new I had a serious case of the cooties.
Too my dismay the glasses I picked out on my first trip to the optometrist (at the tender age of six), the ones with the thick black frames, did not turn me into Clark Kent. I did not get any cool super powers. Powers that would have saved me... if only secretly, from complete dorkdom.
Fourth grade rolled around and it looked like it was all about to change. I continued to lose every pair of glasses my financially strapped parents bought. Hey it's better to be half blind and almost cool then be able to clearly see the kids poking fun. And there was a girl, no beauty queen mind you, but never the less she had all the right equipment and I thought she was cute. One day in the gym it seemed like she was flirting with me. She would say encouraging little things, give me a hard time..joking with me when I screwed up. I was starving for attention so I took the bait. The next shot she missed I approached her and for the first time in my short life I tried to get my Mack on.........
She kicked me full force in the nuts!!!!!! I dropped to the floor blinded by pain that shot through my body like a trillion watt light in the face of a sleeping man. In a way, I had been asleep, dreaming that things had changed for me, that this girl that none of the cool guys would have given the time of day too, had seen something in me that I had known was there all along.
I've gotten past this. I've had longterm relationships and my share of wild nights that left me grinning ear to ear the next morning. But to this day I'm not the kind of guy who can approuch a women in a bar or carry on witty conversations with complete strangers.
Maybe I just need to except this about myself, maybe I should cut myself a little slack. Or maybe I should quit being a complete wuss and buy a Athletic Cup.
When I was a kid I had a hard time relating to the opposite sex. Most girls in elementary school treated me like I had the plague...I might as well have, because everybody new I had a serious case of the cooties.
Too my dismay the glasses I picked out on my first trip to the optometrist (at the tender age of six), the ones with the thick black frames, did not turn me into Clark Kent. I did not get any cool super powers. Powers that would have saved me... if only secretly, from complete dorkdom.
Fourth grade rolled around and it looked like it was all about to change. I continued to lose every pair of glasses my financially strapped parents bought. Hey it's better to be half blind and almost cool then be able to clearly see the kids poking fun. And there was a girl, no beauty queen mind you, but never the less she had all the right equipment and I thought she was cute. One day in the gym it seemed like she was flirting with me. She would say encouraging little things, give me a hard time..joking with me when I screwed up. I was starving for attention so I took the bait. The next shot she missed I approached her and for the first time in my short life I tried to get my Mack on.........
She kicked me full force in the nuts!!!!!! I dropped to the floor blinded by pain that shot through my body like a trillion watt light in the face of a sleeping man. In a way, I had been asleep, dreaming that things had changed for me, that this girl that none of the cool guys would have given the time of day too, had seen something in me that I had known was there all along.
I've gotten past this. I've had longterm relationships and my share of wild nights that left me grinning ear to ear the next morning. But to this day I'm not the kind of guy who can approuch a women in a bar or carry on witty conversations with complete strangers.
Maybe I just need to except this about myself, maybe I should cut myself a little slack. Or maybe I should quit being a complete wuss and buy a Athletic Cup.