A little advice gone haywire at 5 am!
Let me start with omg it feels great telling someone to "fuck off." I'm not saying it is the most healthy thing for a relationship with any person. But sometimes, like that guy you went to high school with who still won't say hello when passing in college corridors, certain people need to be told to "fuck off;" whether in your head or to their face in a diplomatic mature way that might go something like whatever the honest truth is that first pops in your head. Usually truth leaves people without any words, and often its fucking funny as hell, cause most people aren't used to it coming out so un-sugar coated.
I saw someone from my grade school a few weeks ago and tried to start a conversation, and she responded but basically ignored me, so in my head I called her a fucking immature bitch and chose to end the conversation politely and stare at the crazy people crashing into each other in the mall. Because fuck her my time is more important to me, and it's too short to try and teach the girl to grow up just to fucking have a conversation about old times and changes.
The life of a loner is lonely, and little things in absence of your expectations from the world are often let downs. Expectations of something greater, just leads to let downs. Accepting reality sucks, but hey when you do, the sad times make the glad times all the better.
And it seems to me that the best way to bring out true feelings, is to say them in common non-over-sensitive banter and exchange, basically just be blunt with a conversational tone. Not in some over-dramatic statement, like I often make, but simply hey here it is no strings or fuck you's attatched... but if I don't get it out like this I am going to scream your's or someone else's fucking head off over it later.
I still get those moments of suicidal ideation. I'm not gonna act on them. And mostly they come when I have sand in my pussy. Yes I said sand in my pussy. I'm working on that, one of my life projects.
I've graduated and I'm still a failure in some people's eyes, but fuck em.
I love my mom, but she doesn't understand I'm not out there yet in the world, and I haven't found my place and making me feel bad isn't helping. And hell I'm getting down on myself like you wouldn't believe. A deep breath and apply myself and hope in between... maybe we will see a rise in me in the days to come and the new desires on the horizon for me.
And last, but not least, we all have things in common with every fucking disease in psychology books, and everyone goes a little hypochondriac everytime they study for a psych test, but that doesn't mean your problems are diagnosed correctly or that your medication isn't causing it, or even helping your problems.
I saw someone from my grade school a few weeks ago and tried to start a conversation, and she responded but basically ignored me, so in my head I called her a fucking immature bitch and chose to end the conversation politely and stare at the crazy people crashing into each other in the mall. Because fuck her my time is more important to me, and it's too short to try and teach the girl to grow up just to fucking have a conversation about old times and changes.
The life of a loner is lonely, and little things in absence of your expectations from the world are often let downs. Expectations of something greater, just leads to let downs. Accepting reality sucks, but hey when you do, the sad times make the glad times all the better.
And it seems to me that the best way to bring out true feelings, is to say them in common non-over-sensitive banter and exchange, basically just be blunt with a conversational tone. Not in some over-dramatic statement, like I often make, but simply hey here it is no strings or fuck you's attatched... but if I don't get it out like this I am going to scream your's or someone else's fucking head off over it later.
I still get those moments of suicidal ideation. I'm not gonna act on them. And mostly they come when I have sand in my pussy. Yes I said sand in my pussy. I'm working on that, one of my life projects.
I've graduated and I'm still a failure in some people's eyes, but fuck em.
I love my mom, but she doesn't understand I'm not out there yet in the world, and I haven't found my place and making me feel bad isn't helping. And hell I'm getting down on myself like you wouldn't believe. A deep breath and apply myself and hope in between... maybe we will see a rise in me in the days to come and the new desires on the horizon for me.
And last, but not least, we all have things in common with every fucking disease in psychology books, and everyone goes a little hypochondriac everytime they study for a psych test, but that doesn't mean your problems are diagnosed correctly or that your medication isn't causing it, or even helping your problems.