(no subject)
Well Christmas is over and i got a ton of cool things. But for some reason everything just wasn't the the same. This was the first one without my aunt, uncle and cousins. So the whole family had their issues on Christmas. Then I just wasn't really in the mood for all the happiness of everything. Latley I have been very depressed and just really keeping to myself. I don't really know why though. It doesn't have to so with what happened last week, because I noticed myself acting this ways before any of it happened. About a month ago I was so happy with my life and now I hate it. I hate EVERYTHING about it. There isn't on thing that I like. I hate the fact the my mom is dating Brian. I hate him. I hate that I don't have a boyfriend. I hate the way I look. I need to figure out why I am like this and get over it. I don't like being this down and so negitave. I really can't wait until meggy comes home so I can tell her everything and she can make everything better. She always can make any situation better for me. Sometimes I dont know what I would do without her as a friend. Actually I don't know where I would be right now if we hadn't became as close as we are. I also love emily and sarah. They try to make me feel better. But sometimes its just easier to tell meg. but funny thing is most of the time emily know things before meg does. I need to go to bed. It seems if I am sleeping I can't make anyone mad at me or i can't doing anyting wrong. Another thing is ever since my mom and brian have gotten close she has been really hard on me. I can never do anything right for her anymore. It seems like everytime i turn around she's yelling at me for something. I really wish i could just get way from everything.