Ten Songs
Title: Ten songs
Author: wallsurrender
Rating: PG-13...more on the PG side
Pairing: Callie/Erica
A/N: This is my first post EVER. So I am sure there are technical cliches left and right but I tried to clean it up a little. (I hope I did the LJ cut correctly.) Oh, and my best friend's husband's band just put out a new CD as well as his single CD and they appeared quite frequently in my random list.
I thought I would give this a try as a way to get over a bump in the road I've approached for a serial I'm trying to create.
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
1. Gravity - Sara Bareilles - Erica’s POV
As much as I try and run from you. As much as I try to get you out of my head, I can’t! You haunt me. You follow me around like a ghost. And the truly pathetic thing is that I don’t want you to go. I don’t want you to set me free. I want you to keep me close. I want you to love me because I love YOU!
So, here I stand, outside your door with hand raised preparing to knock. But I can’t bring myself to follow through. What if you hurt me again? What if you freak out and sleep out with Mark or run away when I am crying. What if you leave me broken in more pieces?
But what if you don’t? What if you are there this time? What if you run to me instead of away? Is it worth it? The uncertainty? I guess it is because without my mind knowing it my hand knocks and there you stand. As beautiful as I imagined and all I can do is cry.
2. Bona Fide - the Clarks - Callie’s POV
I’m a dare devil. I live my life on the edge without looking behind my back or worrying about what others think. I put what I want first and what I want is YOU. I know, when you were standing right in front of me, I treated you like crap. I wasn’t even me but when you left me standing on the sidewalk, I took a look in the mirror and I realized that I had let the right time pass me by. I had let you pass me by for fear of crossing the line.
But not anymore which is why I have followed you to Boston and am standing in the OR gallery watching you operate. I will not give up. I want you. I choose you and damn-it you are going to want me too because what we have is worth the fight.
3. Masochist - Ingrid Michaelson - Erica’s POV
I think I was a masochist to fall in love with you. For two months all I felt was pain and then it was over. I made it over. I walked away from the pain because I told myself that I couldn’t feel it anymore, but the truth is, it hurts more being away from you then it did the entire time you were ripping my heart. So when I look up and see you in the gallery watching me finish my surgery, I have hope. The heart that was in pieces has hope. And when I see you in your eyes, the Callie that captured my heart in the first place, my hope soars and I know that if you ask, I will fall into your arms even if it means I will be a masochist again because only with you do I feel whole. Only with you do I allow my soft side to show because it’s only with you I dare to trust.
4. Butterflies and Airplanes - The Clarks - Callie’s POV
When you showed up at my door, I knew that it was now or never. I jumped at the chance to show you that I was worthy. That I was not the person who deserts her best friend turned lover. Without thinking, I grabbed your hand, slammed your body against the door and devoured you. And I have not regretted that moment once. It was how I day dreamed I would save the day and I pulled it off. Your face was classic. I almost wish I had had a camera because you were so stunning beautiful. But I knew I had succeeded. You believed me and jumped into the unknown with me and here we stand, watching our twins play in the back yard knowing that life can’t get better than this.
5. All at once - The Fray - Callie’s POV
Every morning that I wake before you, I am amazed by your beauty. When sleep as you in your grips, there is this most peaceful look that crosses your face and I know that I never want to sleep next to anyone again. Your blonde hair often falls over part of your face which gives me an excuse to carefully place it behind your ear. Often this slight movement will cause you to roll towards my touch. I love that even in sleep your reaction is to roll towards me. It took so long for us to get to this point, but I know I need you to live. I know I need you to breathe. I start tracing your jaw, down your neck, across your shoulder, down your arm, gracefully entwining our hands. Now this is how life was meant to be.
6. Danceland Greg Joseph - Callie’s POV
It’s my turn to pick our night out and there is a carnival in town. When I make the suggestion, you roll those stunning blue eyes of yours but I know you secretly like this idea. I talk you into the Ferris wheel, and I’m amazed that you don’t notice that we are the only ones that get on.
When the Ferris wheel gets to the top, just as planned the operator puts the breaks on. You look at me with a raised eyebrow but before you can speak, I interrupt your thoughts: “I love you, Erica Hahn. More than you could ever possibly know. Every morning waking up with you in my arms, leaves me breathless. You never cease to amaze me and I don’t want to ever stop being amazed by you.”
I take her hand in mine, still amazed at how well we fit. “Look at all those people down there. So many of them are wandering around looking for their other half. Wondering if they will ever find the person that completes them. I’m lucky. You know why?”
I could tell that you were having a hard time finding your voice when you croaked out “why?”
“Because I found my other half.” I smile at you as I reach in my pocket and pull out a ring. “Will you always be my other half? Erica Hahn will marry me?”
Tears were streaming down your face, but I loudly heard your whisper “yes.”
And before you could kiss me, I shouted from the top of my lungs “SHE SAID YES” I wanted the whole world to know that Erica Hahn was mine!!!
7. The little things - Colbie Caillat - Erica’s POV
People always said that once you get married, the little things that annoyed you about your lover all the sudden become big things as you realize that you are committed to these annoying habits for life, but with you Callie, I have yet to find that true.
The little things that I notice are how you always put socks on right when you wake up before doing anything else. That you brush your teeth before you brush your hair after taking a shower. That you like to wear your boy shorts and never ever pick your clothes up off the bathroom floor. I notice that you get yourself caught up in the music before realizing how much time has passed. I notice how you always write notes on the mirror after a shower that leave my mouth hanging open and wanting to jump you right then and there.
But mostly I notice that I love you more and more which I personally didn’t think was possible.
8. Plane - Jason Mraz - Callie’s POV
All I ever wanted was to grow old with you. To marry you, have a family and fall asleep in your arms every night knowing that I was safe, but when the doctor said that the tumor was malignant and that it was too far along to do anything about it all I wanted to do was gather you up in my arms and run away. I truly believed that if I ran far enough, hard enough that I could beat back the cancer. That I could keep you safe and keep us safe, but I couldn’t.
You tried to fight it but every day, more of your blonde hair found its way down the shower drain. You were ashamed of your hair lose, but I still found you stunning. I wanted to lose myself in you. We were doctors damn-it. We were supposed to be able to beat death. Especially our own, but the life we had built was going down in flames.
You didn’t want to die in the hospital, so I agreed to take care of you at home. The night you took your last breathe, it was just you and me. Your eyes had lost their luster but I could still see the love. I could still feel the love. As your pulse faded to nonexistent, I shut your eyelids and buried myself in your arms, begging you to take me with you.
Sloan had to come and pull me off your body as the medical examiner took you from me. I couldn’t stay. I couldn’t live where you were around every corner so I jumped on the first plane I could and prayed that the plane would crash so that I could be back in your arms because I don’t know how to live this life without you.
9. You and I - Ingrid Michaelson - Erica’s POV
I never imagined that I would be the type to “settle down” and live the domestic dream but every night when I come home to you blaring your constantly changing taste in music from the stereo system, I know that this is what I was created for so that you and I could be an us. I love how every night, without fail, you try and teach me to dance. You think that if I get just enough practice, the two left feet that I was graced with, will suddenly become dancing machines. But I don’t even mind, because it gives me just one more chance to feel your body pressed up against mine. And what a body it is as your hips sway against mind and then let your head fall back on your shoulder as you let laughter rip through you body at my lack of coordination and I realize that I would dance like a fool every day if it means that I get to hear that musical sound bounce off of the walls of our home, because for you, I would be anything.
10. Wordplay - Jason Mraz - Callie’s POV
The dream I had for my life were as follows: become a doctor, marry a man, have 4 kids. That was the plan, but then I met this blonde, and well, the plans went out the window because I realized that I could live the dream that my parents wanted for me, or I could live the dream that would make me happy and I only knew one person that would make me happy and her name was Erica Hahn.
When she agreed to marry me, I was ecstatic!!! I had never felt so high on life. And two years later when she agreed to have kids with me, you had to practically peal me off the ceiling. Which is where I’m right now, standing over the crib watching our beautiful twins sleep for the first time in their new home and I know that life can’t get much better than this. Wait, it just did, as my beautiful wife wrapped her arms around my waist while we both watched in amazement as our children slept.