(no subject)
i should start using this again.
the problem isn't having nothing to write; it's having too much. it can be so exhausting to sift through every thought in my mind & organize it all to put here.
my head is a swirling disarray of thoughts & emotions & none of them fit together. my crumbling family, my severe depression & self-loathing, my confusion & helplessness about the future. if i could just put every problem side by side, flatten them, make it two-dimensional so that i can lay it all down before me & understand it...
i'm just tired of crying myself to sleep night after night & not being able to pinpoint the exact reason for it.
the problem isn't having nothing to write; it's having too much. it can be so exhausting to sift through every thought in my mind & organize it all to put here.
my head is a swirling disarray of thoughts & emotions & none of them fit together. my crumbling family, my severe depression & self-loathing, my confusion & helplessness about the future. if i could just put every problem side by side, flatten them, make it two-dimensional so that i can lay it all down before me & understand it...
i'm just tired of crying myself to sleep night after night & not being able to pinpoint the exact reason for it.