today

[wakeful_dreamer]

what ever happens. from the way things look, mel and i are through. it sucks my as harder than a hole in the hull of a space station, but thats how it is. im the kind of person that hurts. not hates. i want to stay in contact with her needless to say. id be lying if a said otherwise. and anyone i know will tell you i stand by my word. who knows, maybe we'll reconsile totally one day. but we both have alot of living to do. sometimes on the path we all walk in life. we accidentally lose our way and go certain places that we shouldnt be yet. or sometimes we walk too slow and miss that which we journey for. i dont regret anything i ever do, but i do recognize when i do something wrong, and i accept responsibility for it. the only problem with my code of conduct is.... it hurts me frequently. well. i guess shes out doing her own thing, when ever and with whoever she wants. thats the way it always has been. so. im going to do what i want when i want. and whatever happens happens. i hope shes happy. because im finally out of the hole i fell into when my grandfather downed me some months ago. and you know what? im sorry to all of you. but ive going through the hardest emotional time of my life. and i needed help. but i didnt get it. so i had to deal with it on my own. i finaly did. so i am officialy apologizing to anyone who expressed impatience towards me in my time of need. but dont worry, Fat Mike is back, and i can still drink more, smoke more, chug faster and rock harder than any other mother fucker youll ever meet with the title fat in front of his name. so all you little bitches better start hangin out again. cause i miss all my old drinkin/drug buddies. im no longer a depressed fat man. im over everything and everyone. so i want to party like i did with the big screen motha fuckas. open invite to my place. i want to smoke and drink with my friends. i cant laygh at my own lokes forever. shit ill get commited some come over, get retarded BUT CERTAIN PEOPLE THAT KNOW WHO THEY ARE NEED TO SHOW RESPECT AND NOT ACT LIKE ASSHOLES AND OR BITCHES. THEN, ALL WILL BE WELL. SO COME ON. i miss my buddies:(

-Be Excellent-

P.S. any fighting in my apt will not be tollerated. take it outside or ask me. peace is needed. peace is required. express peace and all is well.