Reckless Abandon
Originally published at Perches in the Soul. You can comment here or there.
“We should go until we are called to stay”
“When we lack direction it is because we lack surrender in our souls”
“The place God calls you to is where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”
This is shat I found when I opened my notebook on Thursday afternoon. I had grabbed the notebook on a whim as I was running out of the house to go spend some time reading and writing at my favorite spot along the river. I had used it when i went to several global health conferences in medical school/end of college. I knew it still had a lot of blank pages so I had grabbed it.
For weeks I have been unsettled. Unsettled and directionless. I am watching everyone make grand plans I can’t seem to find myself quite fitting into mold of doing an fellowship. I can’t quite wrap my head of going out and getting a primary care job. I don’t see my self with the administrative pizazz to do a chief year.. I feel burntout and somewhat jaded.
And then i realized the answer is what has been staring me in the face for the last decade. The answer that was so easy before I was brainwashed by the top childrens hospital in the world to believe that I need a few more letters and and numbers behind my name.
I want to go overseas. I want to move to Africa and be a doctor.
Maybe I will come back and do the right thing and do the fellowship but for a little while I just want to go.