Oh, You Might...
...get a kick out of this. Or not. If you don't, well, I don't really know what's wrong with you. (And I would usually say something like, "Obviously, though, there is something wrong with you because you friended me", but no, I won't, because I love my friends -- mis amigas!(I just realized I have no guy friends on this website. Wow.) -- because they are made of amazing-oscity. And yes, yes that is a lame word that a Mary Sue/Gary Stu would use. And what is my obsession with putting things in parentheses? And putting parentheses in parentheses? And why do I keep asking questions to which I -- and you guys -- don't know the answers? Strange. Eh, I'm not going to try and make myself be quiet, because I just don't care.)
Jeez, where is "Shut Up 101"? Anyway, here you are. Oh, right. There's this, too.
WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS -- THOSE SPOILERS -- FOR "WAY TO GO" (6X24), SO IF YOU WANT TO REMAIN SPOILER-FREE, DO NOT CLICK ON THE CUT, ALTHOUGH I'M FAIRLY SURE EVERYONE HAS ENOUGH COMMON SENSE TO KNOW THAT BY NOW.
This is in lieu of posting the still-unfinished recommendations, which I was supposed to finish on the thirtieth. *shrugs* It'll be up eventually.
Oh yes, and Jade: Because we both suck equally, this is dedicated to you. I'm fairly sure that sentence made no sense whatsoever, but most of my journal doesn't anyway. Actually, scratch that. This is dedicated to you because you're epic, truly epic (and yes, even though you do like Sara, you'll probably appreciate this). And also it is dedicated to anyone else, such as blushingsigh, who is disgusted by G-SR, regardless of whether or not they have even seen my journal. :) And no, this is not a fanfiction. This is something I posted at a CSI forum to which I belong.
The Tale of Grissom's Garments
*Grissom and Sara are sitting in the room together as seen before the show ended, smiling at one another; Sara is the first to speak*
Sara: So how about we get down to business? *stands up and puts fingers on robe's tie* I'll just loosen this tie on the waist of my robe and you --
Grissom: Uh, Sara, I....I can't take off the shirt.
Sara: *looks curiously at Grissom* And why not?
Grissom: I promised Catherine I'd leave the shirt on for the night because she spent hours on end in Wal-Mart trying to find it.
Sara: What? *throws her hands up in the air* You went shopping with Catherine?
Grissom: Yeah, sure, we go together all the time. Who else to you think would have such impeccable taste in fashion? Jeez, she even bought me my sexy straw hat...at sixty percent off! The woman is a genius. She always tells me that I look like a hot ticket in whatever she chooses for me, especially the orange suspenders. She has to fan herself when I wear the orange suspenders with rainbow stripes.
Sara: She...wha?...huh? Grissom, as attractive as I always find you -- and who wouldn't? -- you do actually look kind of...sort of...like a --
Grissom: Like what, Sara? Be honest. Honesty is the key to a stable relationship, you know.
Sara: To be perfectly honest, you look like a middle-aged tourist who should be wearing brown flip-flops with white, knee-high socks and a camera around your neck.
Grissom: Well...at least you were honest. But what will I tell Catherine when she and I go to the zoo next Saturday? She'll be crushed...absolutely devastated!
Sara: You'll just have to tell her that choosing the man's clothing is the job of a loyal girlfriend. And you what? You go to the zoo together?
Grissom: Yes, yes we do. Every other weekend. I like the bugs, she likes the invertebrates. Says they remind her of the ex-boyfriends and husband. And Ecklie. She says the octopus reminds her of Conrad because it has no spine and is always spitting junk into --
Sara: Okay, okay. But what about us Grissom? I mean, we're going to be spending time together.
Grissom: Yeah, sure we will! All three of us will do things together. Breakfast, shopping, the zoo, the park...
Sara: Grissom! We're going to need alone time! We can't always have Catherine with us! I'm your girlfriend, and I'll decide when and where she comes with us. She has a daughter who needs her attention, too, you know.
Grissom: No, Sara, you won't. And Lindsay comes with us sometimes. But usually she stays alone in her room while her grandmother watches her. She's really become quite like a hermit these past few years...
Sara: Gri -- Gil, I should say. You have to make sacrifices in a relationship, and this is the time for you to make one. Now, let's do what we came here to do. *turns over on bed and places fingers on robe's tie*
Grissom: Then I guess we can't be together, because I'm not willing to relinquish that. * insert melodramatic music here*
Sara: *takes fingers off tie, stands from bed, and walks to bathroom's doorframe* Fine then! We won't be together! And you know what? Talking about dying from cancer isn't really romantic, for your information! And, oh yeah: Fake flowers on your shirt equals fake love.^ It was never meant to be! *walks in and slams door*
Grissom: *has been laying that way the whole time because he has a walkie-talkie on the back edge of his pants; he takes it off, brings it to his mouth, and presses the "talk" button* This is Hawaiian Shirt Hottie to Bubbly Blonde, Hawaiian Shirt Hottie to Bubbly Blonde, over. Operation "Drop Miss Midol in Hawaiian Hell" is complete. Repeat, Operation --
Catherine (over walkie-talkie): Yeah, yeah, Gil, okay. Just get out of there before she force-feeds you some Midol or something.
Grissom: Rodger that. And Cath?
Catherine (still over walkie-talkie): Yeah?
Grissom: Do you really think this shirt is sexy on me?
Catherine (walkie-talkie): Oh yes. So sexy, in fact, that if you wear it to the zoo this weekend, the octopus Conrad might get jealous and spray some ink on you.
Grissom: Fine then. I'll just wear the hat.
Catherine ("..."): Rodger that, Hottie. This is Bubbly, over and out.
Grissom: *smiling* Over and out. *stands from bed, walks to the door, opens it, and leaves*
^ Reference to "Rashomama" (6x21)
Just my little way of "venting", I suppose. That's how it should've ended. But maybe, if Carol suddenly springs from the Dark Side, she'll put this in the opener for the Season Seven Premiere. :) *snickers*
Jeez, where is "Shut Up 101"? Anyway, here you are. Oh, right. There's this, too.
WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS -- THOSE SPOILERS -- FOR "WAY TO GO" (6X24), SO IF YOU WANT TO REMAIN SPOILER-FREE, DO NOT CLICK ON THE CUT, ALTHOUGH I'M FAIRLY SURE EVERYONE HAS ENOUGH COMMON SENSE TO KNOW THAT BY NOW.
This is in lieu of posting the still-unfinished recommendations, which I was supposed to finish on the thirtieth. *shrugs* It'll be up eventually.
Oh yes, and Jade: Because we both suck equally, this is dedicated to you. I'm fairly sure that sentence made no sense whatsoever, but most of my journal doesn't anyway. Actually, scratch that. This is dedicated to you because you're epic, truly epic (and yes, even though you do like Sara, you'll probably appreciate this). And also it is dedicated to anyone else, such as blushingsigh, who is disgusted by G-SR, regardless of whether or not they have even seen my journal. :) And no, this is not a fanfiction. This is something I posted at a CSI forum to which I belong.
The Tale of Grissom's Garments
*Grissom and Sara are sitting in the room together as seen before the show ended, smiling at one another; Sara is the first to speak*
Sara: So how about we get down to business? *stands up and puts fingers on robe's tie* I'll just loosen this tie on the waist of my robe and you --
Grissom: Uh, Sara, I....I can't take off the shirt.
Sara: *looks curiously at Grissom* And why not?
Grissom: I promised Catherine I'd leave the shirt on for the night because she spent hours on end in Wal-Mart trying to find it.
Sara: What? *throws her hands up in the air* You went shopping with Catherine?
Grissom: Yeah, sure, we go together all the time. Who else to you think would have such impeccable taste in fashion? Jeez, she even bought me my sexy straw hat...at sixty percent off! The woman is a genius. She always tells me that I look like a hot ticket in whatever she chooses for me, especially the orange suspenders. She has to fan herself when I wear the orange suspenders with rainbow stripes.
Sara: She...wha?...huh? Grissom, as attractive as I always find you -- and who wouldn't? -- you do actually look kind of...sort of...like a --
Grissom: Like what, Sara? Be honest. Honesty is the key to a stable relationship, you know.
Sara: To be perfectly honest, you look like a middle-aged tourist who should be wearing brown flip-flops with white, knee-high socks and a camera around your neck.
Grissom: Well...at least you were honest. But what will I tell Catherine when she and I go to the zoo next Saturday? She'll be crushed...absolutely devastated!
Sara: You'll just have to tell her that choosing the man's clothing is the job of a loyal girlfriend. And you what? You go to the zoo together?
Grissom: Yes, yes we do. Every other weekend. I like the bugs, she likes the invertebrates. Says they remind her of the ex-boyfriends and husband. And Ecklie. She says the octopus reminds her of Conrad because it has no spine and is always spitting junk into --
Sara: Okay, okay. But what about us Grissom? I mean, we're going to be spending time together.
Grissom: Yeah, sure we will! All three of us will do things together. Breakfast, shopping, the zoo, the park...
Sara: Grissom! We're going to need alone time! We can't always have Catherine with us! I'm your girlfriend, and I'll decide when and where she comes with us. She has a daughter who needs her attention, too, you know.
Grissom: No, Sara, you won't. And Lindsay comes with us sometimes. But usually she stays alone in her room while her grandmother watches her. She's really become quite like a hermit these past few years...
Sara: Gri -- Gil, I should say. You have to make sacrifices in a relationship, and this is the time for you to make one. Now, let's do what we came here to do. *turns over on bed and places fingers on robe's tie*
Grissom: Then I guess we can't be together, because I'm not willing to relinquish that. * insert melodramatic music here*
Sara: *takes fingers off tie, stands from bed, and walks to bathroom's doorframe* Fine then! We won't be together! And you know what? Talking about dying from cancer isn't really romantic, for your information! And, oh yeah: Fake flowers on your shirt equals fake love.^ It was never meant to be! *walks in and slams door*
Grissom: *has been laying that way the whole time because he has a walkie-talkie on the back edge of his pants; he takes it off, brings it to his mouth, and presses the "talk" button* This is Hawaiian Shirt Hottie to Bubbly Blonde, Hawaiian Shirt Hottie to Bubbly Blonde, over. Operation "Drop Miss Midol in Hawaiian Hell" is complete. Repeat, Operation --
Catherine (over walkie-talkie): Yeah, yeah, Gil, okay. Just get out of there before she force-feeds you some Midol or something.
Grissom: Rodger that. And Cath?
Catherine (still over walkie-talkie): Yeah?
Grissom: Do you really think this shirt is sexy on me?
Catherine (walkie-talkie): Oh yes. So sexy, in fact, that if you wear it to the zoo this weekend, the octopus Conrad might get jealous and spray some ink on you.
Grissom: Fine then. I'll just wear the hat.
Catherine ("..."): Rodger that, Hottie. This is Bubbly, over and out.
Grissom: *smiling* Over and out. *stands from bed, walks to the door, opens it, and leaves*
^ Reference to "Rashomama" (6x21)
Just my little way of "venting", I suppose. That's how it should've ended. But maybe, if Carol suddenly springs from the Dark Side, she'll put this in the opener for the Season Seven Premiere. :) *snickers*