An Infrequent Occurrence
I'm having a tall day.
Was washing my hands when I glanced up and saw in the mirror that wow, as organisms of Earth go, I am a hulkingly big one! Much bigger than the vast majority of them, and that's even without counting, like, bacteria. Heck, even within the animal kingdom! Even within mammals! I AM A GOLIATH. And if that's not enough, a great deal of my comparatively enormous body is taken up by these two long stilty things upon which I balance myself VERTICALLY in a truly absurd fashion, as if to look down at all the cats and chipmunks and wallabies and deer and FREAKING TIGERS, which are VERY LARGE ANIMALS, and say, "Ha ha ha! I tower over all of you like a living skyscraper! When my line of sight is cast out straight, like the beacon of a mighty lighthouse, there is great and terrible distance between it and the ground, allowing me to see long sprawling distances! I AM A GIANT! A GIANT OF EXTRAORDINARY TALLNESS!"
This is unusual for me, but does lend interesting import to my day-to-day activities. ("My incredible height allows me to easily work at this kitchen counter, which itself stands well above the heads of most animals! Even the majestic lion would have to concede defeat and descend to knead its challah dough on the floor!")
***
To anyone who wonders about my actual, technical, numeric height, it's roughly 5'1".
Was washing my hands when I glanced up and saw in the mirror that wow, as organisms of Earth go, I am a hulkingly big one! Much bigger than the vast majority of them, and that's even without counting, like, bacteria. Heck, even within the animal kingdom! Even within mammals! I AM A GOLIATH. And if that's not enough, a great deal of my comparatively enormous body is taken up by these two long stilty things upon which I balance myself VERTICALLY in a truly absurd fashion, as if to look down at all the cats and chipmunks and wallabies and deer and FREAKING TIGERS, which are VERY LARGE ANIMALS, and say, "Ha ha ha! I tower over all of you like a living skyscraper! When my line of sight is cast out straight, like the beacon of a mighty lighthouse, there is great and terrible distance between it and the ground, allowing me to see long sprawling distances! I AM A GIANT! A GIANT OF EXTRAORDINARY TALLNESS!"
This is unusual for me, but does lend interesting import to my day-to-day activities. ("My incredible height allows me to easily work at this kitchen counter, which itself stands well above the heads of most animals! Even the majestic lion would have to concede defeat and descend to knead its challah dough on the floor!")
***
To anyone who wonders about my actual, technical, numeric height, it's roughly 5'1".