(no subject)
Pain for pleasure.
The seas have parted,
The endings started,
The sky has turned to black.
A killing spree through eternity,
the devil stabs you in the back,
It's midnight now you must escape somehow,
torture is his leisure,
Don't try to hide he'll make you subside,
As he exchanges pain for pleasure,
Pain for pleasure, he's the hunter you're the game,
Pain for pleasure, Satan is his name!
That's really true. Nothing can be quite that simple. Something is wrong and I can't place my finger on it. It's one of those weird emotions/feelings. I've been having the worst headaches and nothing I do short of drilling a hole into my skull makes them go away. And I've been doing really really stupid things lately. Like this weekend. Wants (not the right word) are fastly fading and make you do things that injure others. I have never been the type of person to need a guy to make me feel better. Hell, I am the person that tells her best friend that guys are idiots who only think with their penis. But for some reason I feel that I need a guy to make me whole.
I've always been closer to guys. I normally have a few close girl friends and a lot of casual guy friends along with my really close guy friends. It must just come from living with my brother and a neighborhood full of boys. So my close guy friends run to me when they have problems and I to them. In general it sucks. I guess it's not that bad I just feel like complaining now. I don't know what it is. I just get so mopey/depressed/lifeless when I'm in my room. And since my schedule has prevented me from having fun lately it really blows. I can't say what I don't like about it here. Maybe I just can't deal with how I know nothing about my roomie and how little we interact. We share no real interests, hell, I don't even know her favorite color. I have always struggled with feeling happy. And I generally do when I am around people. But the second that I'm alone it hits me like an 18-wheeler.
....Phone....
Aight I'm over that. I'm actually smiling and laughing now.
The seas have parted,
The endings started,
The sky has turned to black.
A killing spree through eternity,
the devil stabs you in the back,
It's midnight now you must escape somehow,
torture is his leisure,
Don't try to hide he'll make you subside,
As he exchanges pain for pleasure,
Pain for pleasure, he's the hunter you're the game,
Pain for pleasure, Satan is his name!
That's really true. Nothing can be quite that simple. Something is wrong and I can't place my finger on it. It's one of those weird emotions/feelings. I've been having the worst headaches and nothing I do short of drilling a hole into my skull makes them go away. And I've been doing really really stupid things lately. Like this weekend. Wants (not the right word) are fastly fading and make you do things that injure others. I have never been the type of person to need a guy to make me feel better. Hell, I am the person that tells her best friend that guys are idiots who only think with their penis. But for some reason I feel that I need a guy to make me whole.
I've always been closer to guys. I normally have a few close girl friends and a lot of casual guy friends along with my really close guy friends. It must just come from living with my brother and a neighborhood full of boys. So my close guy friends run to me when they have problems and I to them. In general it sucks. I guess it's not that bad I just feel like complaining now. I don't know what it is. I just get so mopey/depressed/lifeless when I'm in my room. And since my schedule has prevented me from having fun lately it really blows. I can't say what I don't like about it here. Maybe I just can't deal with how I know nothing about my roomie and how little we interact. We share no real interests, hell, I don't even know her favorite color. I have always struggled with feeling happy. And I generally do when I am around people. But the second that I'm alone it hits me like an 18-wheeler.
....Phone....
Aight I'm over that. I'm actually smiling and laughing now.