Harry Potter (Harry)
so dead that i don't know what i'm writing. though i have a favour to ask you all : i need angst!fic. like cry-your-eyes-out angst!fic. like my-heart-is-broken-how-could-you-you-horrible-horrible-lovely-person angst!fic. because i have not read crying angst(or really read at all) in longlong time. x_x sankku.
title: the end
character: harry potter
rating: pg13
you used to imagine the end when you were younger (more naive). it went something like this.
there was a field. there was a line down the field, red and shimmering and in your darker moments, you wondered if it wasn't made of blood. you were on one side of the field and he was on the other. he had his followers. you had your love. he raised his wand. you lifted yours. you shot and there was red light and green just like the first time and then a sudden sheer burst. "i love you" said someone before it all cleared and you realized that momlily and heard the shuffling of robes. he came. you fought. with the knife sirius gave you, you stabbed him. he fell into the line, disappeared like sirius had the veil but he was screaming and grabbing at dudley's old clothes and he took your wand. but once he disappeared you knew he was gone. the death eaters disappeared. your best friends apparated. and the celebrations began.
you were disappointed when it actually happened. it went something like this.
ron jumped on his face when he tried to say those two little big words. ron died. hermoine pushed you out of the way when he tried to say those words again. she died. draco smiled and said those two little big words before he was turned to bits. you still have his hair. it would be a war, you realized just then, that would decimate the wizarding population, kill the children and move the median age up twenty years. you stood up. for the first time in your life, you said those two little big words just as he did and everything turned golden before you took out sirius' knife. it melted. he broke the thread and fawkes appeared. sang. and what you did then (you regret doing it) was ran up to voldemort. took your wand and stuck it as far into his eye as it would go. kicked him. bit him. strangled him. and like the basilisk, you took the sword and stabbed him. fifty nine times. when you were done, you laid down.
next to his dead body, you laid down. ron would've said you were mad. bloody mad. and you were: in a way, you wished this moment would never end. last forever, because when you stood up, you'd see him. his body. ron's body. her body. draco's hair. you'd have to admit it was real. dumbledore: gone. trelawny and snape and mcgonagall and bill and peeves and ginny and hermoine and ron. ernie and neville and seamus and percy and parvati and millicent and cho. colin and dean and aunt petunia and slughorn and mr. granger and draco.
you'd have to admit that after all was said and done, the prophecy has been fulfilled. sirius. remus. james. lily. peter. that there would be more funerals than marriages. more tears than laughter. no one to rejoice with; plenty to cry. mrs. weasley, who lost over half her family. mr. diggory, who lost his wife. eloise midgen, who didn't have enough face left for acne. tonks.
you choke. with water in your lungs that trailed from your eyes into your nose and throat and lungs, you realize that this was a children's crusade paid for with children's lives. that you were left but only part. that after eighteen years you have completed your life accomplishment and you don't have anyone to share it with. because you don't want to know how much their memories will fade, sixty years in the future and don't want to spend the rest of your life close enough to touch but not quite touching (oh how did dumbledore stand his pensieve). you realize.
so you take out his old wand. sirius or ron's or draco's you don't know but it's a wand. you say those two little big words one more time because the prophecy only said one couldn't live while the other was living and not that one wouldn't die while the other was dead. you pray and smile and take a deep breath. remember us, you tell the world. please don't forget.
title: the end
character: harry potter
rating: pg13
you used to imagine the end when you were younger (more naive). it went something like this.
there was a field. there was a line down the field, red and shimmering and in your darker moments, you wondered if it wasn't made of blood. you were on one side of the field and he was on the other. he had his followers. you had your love. he raised his wand. you lifted yours. you shot and there was red light and green just like the first time and then a sudden sheer burst. "i love you" said someone before it all cleared and you realized that momlily and heard the shuffling of robes. he came. you fought. with the knife sirius gave you, you stabbed him. he fell into the line, disappeared like sirius had the veil but he was screaming and grabbing at dudley's old clothes and he took your wand. but once he disappeared you knew he was gone. the death eaters disappeared. your best friends apparated. and the celebrations began.
you were disappointed when it actually happened. it went something like this.
ron jumped on his face when he tried to say those two little big words. ron died. hermoine pushed you out of the way when he tried to say those words again. she died. draco smiled and said those two little big words before he was turned to bits. you still have his hair. it would be a war, you realized just then, that would decimate the wizarding population, kill the children and move the median age up twenty years. you stood up. for the first time in your life, you said those two little big words just as he did and everything turned golden before you took out sirius' knife. it melted. he broke the thread and fawkes appeared. sang. and what you did then (you regret doing it) was ran up to voldemort. took your wand and stuck it as far into his eye as it would go. kicked him. bit him. strangled him. and like the basilisk, you took the sword and stabbed him. fifty nine times. when you were done, you laid down.
next to his dead body, you laid down. ron would've said you were mad. bloody mad. and you were: in a way, you wished this moment would never end. last forever, because when you stood up, you'd see him. his body. ron's body. her body. draco's hair. you'd have to admit it was real. dumbledore: gone. trelawny and snape and mcgonagall and bill and peeves and ginny and hermoine and ron. ernie and neville and seamus and percy and parvati and millicent and cho. colin and dean and aunt petunia and slughorn and mr. granger and draco.
you'd have to admit that after all was said and done, the prophecy has been fulfilled. sirius. remus. james. lily. peter. that there would be more funerals than marriages. more tears than laughter. no one to rejoice with; plenty to cry. mrs. weasley, who lost over half her family. mr. diggory, who lost his wife. eloise midgen, who didn't have enough face left for acne. tonks.
you choke. with water in your lungs that trailed from your eyes into your nose and throat and lungs, you realize that this was a children's crusade paid for with children's lives. that you were left but only part. that after eighteen years you have completed your life accomplishment and you don't have anyone to share it with. because you don't want to know how much their memories will fade, sixty years in the future and don't want to spend the rest of your life close enough to touch but not quite touching (oh how did dumbledore stand his pensieve). you realize.
so you take out his old wand. sirius or ron's or draco's you don't know but it's a wand. you say those two little big words one more time because the prophecy only said one couldn't live while the other was living and not that one wouldn't die while the other was dead. you pray and smile and take a deep breath. remember us, you tell the world. please don't forget.