More rantypants

[w0rdinista]

I have these two pet peeves. And they're two pretty significant ones, as far as these things go (three, actually, if you count how much I hate to listen to noisy eaters slurp and lipsmack their way through a meal).

Peeve the First: I hate being interrupted. Because nothing sends the message that what you have to say isn't important like someone

Comments

[darkfrog24]

Heh, don't show up at one of my family gatherings, then! Interrupting is the only way to enter a conversation, usually by saying half a sentence and then stopping. That lets the speaker know that someone wants a turn and what the person wants to talk about.

I still don't know what the outside-my-family way of entering a conversation is. Just waiting for the other person to stop talking never seems to work.

But yeah, if she knows you don't like it, then a reasonable effort on her part to remember is only fitting.

As for the making you wait, you've got three options. 1) Explain to her that she raised you better than to keep people waiting. Maybe she has no idea that you don't consider the hour in her living room to be a fun and relaxing part of the visit. (Not too likely, I know, but, hey, think of it as a warning shot.)

2) LEAVE WITHOUT HER a time or two and respond to any subsequent bitching with how bad it would have been to be late and/or by leaving her instructions to meet you there instead of carpooling.

3) Give it up. Bring a book. Consider the hour in her living room a relaxing bit of B-grade alone time.

[w0rdinista]

See, at family gatherings, that's different -- when my entire family gets together, it's a free-for-all, and there's often three or four conversations going on at once. I don't mind that at all. What drives me up a wall is when Mom and I are in the car, alone, driving off to points known or unknown and my contribution to the conversation will consist of the occasional truncated phrase:

"But what about--"
"What do you think--"
"Where can we--"
"But--"
"I th--"

It has gotten to the point where other people will remark to me later that my mom is not so big on the letting me get a word in edgewise. And I know a lot of it has to do with her being the eldest child of eight, but sometimes the whole thing drives me up a wall. I've actually talked with her about the interruption thing, and she's aware of it, and sometimes even catches herself and apologizes, but the past few times I've gone to visit with her, I get verbally steamrolled.

As for the making me wait thing... I've actually done all three of those things. We've now moved into Ways You Can Not Be Running Around Like A Headless Chicken -- I finally got her to agree to set the coffeemaker the night before, because oh my god, you would not believe what an ordeal it is to make coffee at her house.

Some mornings I just don't want to screw around, and I forego the carpooling -- it's actually kind of nice sometimes, because I can be done with my shopping and be back usually before she's even left (that boggles me -- I'd much rather get out as early as possible, before places get busy).

The amazing part is that I'm the Picsces and she's the Virgo -- I'M supposed to be the one running late all the time! ;)

Re:

[darkfrog24]

See, at family gatherings, that's different -- when my entire family gets together, it's a free-for-all, and there's often three or four conversations going on at once. I don't mind that at all.

Same here. But tossing me a "Outsiders ways are not our ways" might've saved me some trouble. (Goddamned thunderdome, how was I to know that asking about the return policy was going back on a deal?)