baby its cold outside.
It's cold in my apartment and I am feeling like a creaky old piece of wood thats got its last splinter holding it together. I'm under the weather and its just a bit too cold in here. Nothing left to do really besides this... I have watched all of the episodes of serial sexy Dexter on Dvd and I can't really pick up the guitar and write songs feeling like this. I;m trying to stir up ideas... things to write about... maybe just start doing the short story path and maybe one day after I have mastered the small pages I can move on up. I need to start reading the New Yorker but its so damn expensive... I can barely afford groceries let alone the New Yorker.
Libraries don't like me... I generally have a hard time giving back the books.
I am tossing around this idea...
may end up being a better song then a short story
I was riding the subway train looking into the dark spaces in the tunnels and keeping my eyes open for the tracks that run below the tracks... the ones that are rarely used unless absolutely necessary. I started thinking about the whole of the city beneath the city.
and I started thinking
"I've got a silent dream to run with the unseen
to walk along the tracks that don't come back
and to keep my secrets clean."
I have a character in my head
a girl
who for some credit is like me
but she wants to live outside the confines of society
she grew up in a fairly normal situation...
not entirely I guess
only child
lonely child
and for all her beauty she never really wanted to be seen for it
and she never really wanted to walk among the beautiful in the world
she would rather make her peace with life underneath the heart of it all
in the tunnels of manhattan
under the bridges of london
in the mines of the west
with others who meet and speak of long ago times
and live with long ago ideals
I don't know what else yet...
its just an idea
may just end up being a song...
........................
in other news...
I need to figure out a way to weed out all the people
who I only hear in my head as a negative voice
I mean I have basically done it
I just
I just want to live my life here I think
I don't think I am going to travel back to long sialdn looking for my old life
I lived that life there
and if I go back again
I would rather live a different new one
than run in the same circles
regardless
I want my life to be where I reside
and I have taken every opportunity to avoid a life here
because when I started I thought my life would be different and it didnt work out the way I planned
Im just excited I have a pick up in my guitar
music these past few years has been my way of meting people
I just need to be more careful about who I meet
and generally speaking
musicians are selfish people
I have to keep a keen eye out for the humble ones
I need to just be here... now
Libraries don't like me... I generally have a hard time giving back the books.
I am tossing around this idea...
may end up being a better song then a short story
I was riding the subway train looking into the dark spaces in the tunnels and keeping my eyes open for the tracks that run below the tracks... the ones that are rarely used unless absolutely necessary. I started thinking about the whole of the city beneath the city.
and I started thinking
"I've got a silent dream to run with the unseen
to walk along the tracks that don't come back
and to keep my secrets clean."
I have a character in my head
a girl
who for some credit is like me
but she wants to live outside the confines of society
she grew up in a fairly normal situation...
not entirely I guess
only child
lonely child
and for all her beauty she never really wanted to be seen for it
and she never really wanted to walk among the beautiful in the world
she would rather make her peace with life underneath the heart of it all
in the tunnels of manhattan
under the bridges of london
in the mines of the west
with others who meet and speak of long ago times
and live with long ago ideals
I don't know what else yet...
its just an idea
may just end up being a song...
........................
in other news...
I need to figure out a way to weed out all the people
who I only hear in my head as a negative voice
I mean I have basically done it
I just
I just want to live my life here I think
I don't think I am going to travel back to long sialdn looking for my old life
I lived that life there
and if I go back again
I would rather live a different new one
than run in the same circles
regardless
I want my life to be where I reside
and I have taken every opportunity to avoid a life here
because when I started I thought my life would be different and it didnt work out the way I planned
Im just excited I have a pick up in my guitar
music these past few years has been my way of meting people
I just need to be more careful about who I meet
and generally speaking
musicians are selfish people
I have to keep a keen eye out for the humble ones
I need to just be here... now