When fun goes wrong and I find myself to be in the proverbial pile of deep shit
Last week, my parents were on vacation. They left for Wasaga Beach, Ontario, for a whole week, along with my sister and a family of friends. I was alone in my house for the entire week.
Pretty sweet time I had, I gotta say. I didn't actually do anything special, just worked, ate and slept. Watched TV once in a while, went to the gym(when the weather was below 28 freaking degrees) and all. But I wasn't going to let the perfect week pass by without having some fun.
My parents asked me 2 things when they left:
1. No parties. I could drink with a couple of friends, but no loud music, no crowds, no breaking stuff.
2. The house MUST be in the same state it was when they left.
No trouble. They were supposed to come back on Sunday afternoon. Since I work from Monday to Friday, I decided I'd tell my friends we can have a small drinking session on Friday night, while watching a DVD or something. Most had excuses to not show up, but Ben and his girlfriend accepted the invitation. They asked which beer I wanted to get. Beer? Not this time. We got ourselves some Jack Daniels, Finnish vodka and Gold Schlaeger(spelling? It's the cinnamon-flavored liquor from Italy, I believe).
The week passed, it was Friday night already, so I picked them up at their place with the alcohol, we swam around in the pool for a good while, we actually went to another friend's place to ask if he really didn't wanna join us, but he wasn't there, so we chatted with his parents and left.
When we got back, I picked our first DVD of the evening, The Forsaken, a very shitty vampire movie my uncle lent me for a reason I totally ignore. He probably likes vampire movies. Or he just didn't want to have this piece of trash in his house. Actually, it's not as bad as I make it sound. You see the boobs of the blonde chick from Coyote Ugly(not the main character, the other one) for a couple of minutes. And the rest is crap.
We drank a lot, the movie ended, and I went to start the second movie of the evening(The Breed, another vampire movie. Bad, but so fucking weird it's actually worth seeing it. I almost recommend it. Almost.), but I realized there was no French version on it! So I took one of my mother's DVDs, The Patriot, and we kept drinking while watching old man Mel shredding some Brits to pieces with his tomahawks.
That is, until my dude's girlfriend got sick and started puking like crazy. We took her to the bathroom, his boyfriend watched over her, and he told me there was no way she would get back to his place on foot in the state she was in, so I got a bed ready in the basement. As I came back up, the guy was panicked. She had passed out on the bathroom floor. I had to take the shower head and sprinkle her face with cold water, after which she got back to her puking.
She passed out two other times, if I remember correctly, then she begged me to call for an ambulance. I really didn't want to, but she looked like a freaking mess, so I did. The 911 people asked me to watch for them, as it was pretty freaking dark outside, and this was not enough of an emergency for them to come here with the big flashing lights and all, so I had to run back and forth between the bathroom and the driveway, and it was raining pretty heavily outside, even though the heat had not left.
The boyfriend was panicked like I had never seen him, and after what felt like 30 minutes, the ambulance finally arrived here and they both left in it, leaving all of their stuff here. I asked my friend to call as soon as he could to keep me updated on their status, and I got back inside, sweaty and exhausted.
I don't think I got sick only because of the alcohol, as I was feeling perfectly fine, and had not had any for a very long time at that point, I think probably the stress, exhaustion, and also the guilt, got me sick. I had just enough energy to run to the bathroom and be sick. At about 5:30am, I was done and I got back to bed, still dressed up.
I heard the phone, but I didn't get up in time to pick it up. Then, at 12:30, I heard the doorbell. Once. Twice. I was DOOMED, if it was my parents, definitely doomed, but I got up and opened the door. My aunt and uncle from Montréal were there, and they stuck their dog right into my face as I opened the door. Their over-affective lick-happy dog. Hmm, the nice smell of the hangover. They said they had called a while ago but I didn't pick up the phone. That meant my friends hadn't called.
My uncle and aunt are actually spending the week(this week, starting tomorrow) here, but they had some stuff to leave at my place before heading to my grandparents' place, so they brought it to the basement. I had no idea they would show up here yesterday!
Did I tell you I had been sick all night and fell asleep right after it? Cuz I did. The alcohol bottles, the bed in the basement, and the puke in the bathroom, accompanied by its unbearable smell, they were all still there. Along with the shoes and the handbag of my dude's girlfriend. My aunt asked if I had fun the evening before. I said I had some friends come over and we had a couple of drinks. I also said they were so drunk they left without their stuff.
I'll know if they believed me tomorrow, when they come back.
They invited me to have dinner with them at Ashton's, a local poutine restaurant. Poutine isn't good when you got sick a couple of hours ago, but since there was about nothing to eat at my place, and they were going to pay, I made the bold move to...agree. I only ate half a baby's portion with a glass of iced tea, and they brought me back home, then left.
Ooof. The poutine didn't go down easily, but it didn't go up either. I sat here, read some stuff over the internet, felt dizzy for a good part of the afternoon, and chatted with Victor.
By the way, Victor, if you're reading this, I hope you had fun. Long life to the decision-taking you! Long life to independence!
My two friends also called in the afternoon. The girl was okay. They kept her at the hospital all night, and gave her some pills or product for after-drunkedness...or whatever. They came over, I opened the door, they said hi, and she turned back as soon as she had shut her mouth. Then she puked on the driveway. Yes. She puked on my driveway. And she puked a lot. My friend looked desperate. I probably did too, but I handed him all their stuff and said he shouldn't bother about the driveway. When they left, I had to go outside in the rain, too dizzy to think straight and actually pick up a coat, and I brought the hose from the backyard to the driveway, to clean the puke.
That reminded me that the house was a fucking mess. So I cleaned everything. And let me tell you: If you ever get drunk, don't let any of it go into the bathtub. For God's sake, not the bathtub. That stinking shit was spread all over the tub's surface and I must have used 4 different products along with the "strong" shower jet to make it go away. Must have taken an hour. I undid the bed in the basement, cleaned the glasses, emptied the trashcans, I even cleaned the floor.
Then I went out, bought some of those dry salty square-shaped cookies and some Gatorade and had a sick-guy's snack. I also rented Spiderman 2 for PS2. Not bad. Not bad at all. Not great either. But the point is: Not bad. Felt like GTA, only, much more repetitive. And either all three of my controllers are broken, or the web-swinging thing sucks like hell, cuz sometimes I could press the button like a crazy fuck and that stupid spiderbitch wouldn't do anything. Pretty annoying, especially when you're running after the big-boobed thief girl.
I played for a while, until my parents arrived. Yeah, they arrived yesterday night, instead of this afternoon. Because of the rain. I'm pretty lucky they didn't arrive in the afternoon, because I'd be dead. They were pretty proud of me, since the house was in an even better state than it was when they left.
The thing is; I met some other friends today, who told me that when you call an ambulance, they send you a 150$ bill. I guess I'll have to have a nice conversation with mom&dad when it gets here. Obviously, my 2 friends will have to pay the bill for me, because nobody in that house will, but one way or another, the call was made here, so we are going to receive it.
Anyway, I shouldn't get too worried about that: The 2 conditions were met, even though under different conditions, I would've been in shit. And my sister's done much, much worse stuff, and SHE was forgiven, under no conditions, so if they decide to fall on my back, I can always save myself with the sis. For once, just for once, I guess it won't actually hurt her to be useful to me, right?
Pretty sweet time I had, I gotta say. I didn't actually do anything special, just worked, ate and slept. Watched TV once in a while, went to the gym(when the weather was below 28 freaking degrees) and all. But I wasn't going to let the perfect week pass by without having some fun.
My parents asked me 2 things when they left:
1. No parties. I could drink with a couple of friends, but no loud music, no crowds, no breaking stuff.
2. The house MUST be in the same state it was when they left.
No trouble. They were supposed to come back on Sunday afternoon. Since I work from Monday to Friday, I decided I'd tell my friends we can have a small drinking session on Friday night, while watching a DVD or something. Most had excuses to not show up, but Ben and his girlfriend accepted the invitation. They asked which beer I wanted to get. Beer? Not this time. We got ourselves some Jack Daniels, Finnish vodka and Gold Schlaeger(spelling? It's the cinnamon-flavored liquor from Italy, I believe).
The week passed, it was Friday night already, so I picked them up at their place with the alcohol, we swam around in the pool for a good while, we actually went to another friend's place to ask if he really didn't wanna join us, but he wasn't there, so we chatted with his parents and left.
When we got back, I picked our first DVD of the evening, The Forsaken, a very shitty vampire movie my uncle lent me for a reason I totally ignore. He probably likes vampire movies. Or he just didn't want to have this piece of trash in his house. Actually, it's not as bad as I make it sound. You see the boobs of the blonde chick from Coyote Ugly(not the main character, the other one) for a couple of minutes. And the rest is crap.
We drank a lot, the movie ended, and I went to start the second movie of the evening(The Breed, another vampire movie. Bad, but so fucking weird it's actually worth seeing it. I almost recommend it. Almost.), but I realized there was no French version on it! So I took one of my mother's DVDs, The Patriot, and we kept drinking while watching old man Mel shredding some Brits to pieces with his tomahawks.
That is, until my dude's girlfriend got sick and started puking like crazy. We took her to the bathroom, his boyfriend watched over her, and he told me there was no way she would get back to his place on foot in the state she was in, so I got a bed ready in the basement. As I came back up, the guy was panicked. She had passed out on the bathroom floor. I had to take the shower head and sprinkle her face with cold water, after which she got back to her puking.
She passed out two other times, if I remember correctly, then she begged me to call for an ambulance. I really didn't want to, but she looked like a freaking mess, so I did. The 911 people asked me to watch for them, as it was pretty freaking dark outside, and this was not enough of an emergency for them to come here with the big flashing lights and all, so I had to run back and forth between the bathroom and the driveway, and it was raining pretty heavily outside, even though the heat had not left.
The boyfriend was panicked like I had never seen him, and after what felt like 30 minutes, the ambulance finally arrived here and they both left in it, leaving all of their stuff here. I asked my friend to call as soon as he could to keep me updated on their status, and I got back inside, sweaty and exhausted.
I don't think I got sick only because of the alcohol, as I was feeling perfectly fine, and had not had any for a very long time at that point, I think probably the stress, exhaustion, and also the guilt, got me sick. I had just enough energy to run to the bathroom and be sick. At about 5:30am, I was done and I got back to bed, still dressed up.
I heard the phone, but I didn't get up in time to pick it up. Then, at 12:30, I heard the doorbell. Once. Twice. I was DOOMED, if it was my parents, definitely doomed, but I got up and opened the door. My aunt and uncle from Montréal were there, and they stuck their dog right into my face as I opened the door. Their over-affective lick-happy dog. Hmm, the nice smell of the hangover. They said they had called a while ago but I didn't pick up the phone. That meant my friends hadn't called.
My uncle and aunt are actually spending the week(this week, starting tomorrow) here, but they had some stuff to leave at my place before heading to my grandparents' place, so they brought it to the basement. I had no idea they would show up here yesterday!
Did I tell you I had been sick all night and fell asleep right after it? Cuz I did. The alcohol bottles, the bed in the basement, and the puke in the bathroom, accompanied by its unbearable smell, they were all still there. Along with the shoes and the handbag of my dude's girlfriend. My aunt asked if I had fun the evening before. I said I had some friends come over and we had a couple of drinks. I also said they were so drunk they left without their stuff.
I'll know if they believed me tomorrow, when they come back.
They invited me to have dinner with them at Ashton's, a local poutine restaurant. Poutine isn't good when you got sick a couple of hours ago, but since there was about nothing to eat at my place, and they were going to pay, I made the bold move to...agree. I only ate half a baby's portion with a glass of iced tea, and they brought me back home, then left.
Ooof. The poutine didn't go down easily, but it didn't go up either. I sat here, read some stuff over the internet, felt dizzy for a good part of the afternoon, and chatted with Victor.
By the way, Victor, if you're reading this, I hope you had fun. Long life to the decision-taking you! Long life to independence!
My two friends also called in the afternoon. The girl was okay. They kept her at the hospital all night, and gave her some pills or product for after-drunkedness...or whatever. They came over, I opened the door, they said hi, and she turned back as soon as she had shut her mouth. Then she puked on the driveway. Yes. She puked on my driveway. And she puked a lot. My friend looked desperate. I probably did too, but I handed him all their stuff and said he shouldn't bother about the driveway. When they left, I had to go outside in the rain, too dizzy to think straight and actually pick up a coat, and I brought the hose from the backyard to the driveway, to clean the puke.
That reminded me that the house was a fucking mess. So I cleaned everything. And let me tell you: If you ever get drunk, don't let any of it go into the bathtub. For God's sake, not the bathtub. That stinking shit was spread all over the tub's surface and I must have used 4 different products along with the "strong" shower jet to make it go away. Must have taken an hour. I undid the bed in the basement, cleaned the glasses, emptied the trashcans, I even cleaned the floor.
Then I went out, bought some of those dry salty square-shaped cookies and some Gatorade and had a sick-guy's snack. I also rented Spiderman 2 for PS2. Not bad. Not bad at all. Not great either. But the point is: Not bad. Felt like GTA, only, much more repetitive. And either all three of my controllers are broken, or the web-swinging thing sucks like hell, cuz sometimes I could press the button like a crazy fuck and that stupid spiderbitch wouldn't do anything. Pretty annoying, especially when you're running after the big-boobed thief girl.
I played for a while, until my parents arrived. Yeah, they arrived yesterday night, instead of this afternoon. Because of the rain. I'm pretty lucky they didn't arrive in the afternoon, because I'd be dead. They were pretty proud of me, since the house was in an even better state than it was when they left.
The thing is; I met some other friends today, who told me that when you call an ambulance, they send you a 150$ bill. I guess I'll have to have a nice conversation with mom&dad when it gets here. Obviously, my 2 friends will have to pay the bill for me, because nobody in that house will, but one way or another, the call was made here, so we are going to receive it.
Anyway, I shouldn't get too worried about that: The 2 conditions were met, even though under different conditions, I would've been in shit. And my sister's done much, much worse stuff, and SHE was forgiven, under no conditions, so if they decide to fall on my back, I can always save myself with the sis. For once, just for once, I guess it won't actually hurt her to be useful to me, right?