Irritable.
I came home today to check to see on how Mojo was doing. For the past few days I was worried about him because I talked with Emily and she said that it's very probable that he has breast cancer (male guinea pig AND breast cancer? Don't see the logic there... ). Res was getting really irritating because I feel like I need to defend why I should feel sad that my guinea pig is sick. I don't care that it's a guinea pig. It could be a worm, and if I had emotional attachment to it, I shouldn't have to defend why I feel sad about my pet potentially dying within the next few months. I feel really sensitive, and the last thing that I want to hear is that a guinea pig is a dumb animal or that I should move on already (because that's what you do when your pet has cancer). Great.
I was hoping to gain more sympathy and support at home, but the more that I talked with my mom about the issue, the more it upset me. I never implied that I wanted to take Mojo to the vet to get the cyst removed, but my mom doesn't even want to go there to at least see if it's something that we should be worried about. It's all because of our last guinea pig Holly, who had a cyst on her shoulder: we took her to the vet, eventually had an operation, and then a month later she died. My mom doesn't think that it's logical to spend money, and I can understand where she's coming from, but I'm still frustrated. I get really upset about these issues because I don't understand how money is spent in this family. My parents are willing to spend $250 to replace the Jag hood ornament that was stolen on the car, but when it comes to our family pet, not one penny is being offered to at least get an opinion on Mojo's health problems. I look at this guinea pig and it breaks my heart to see him losing all this weight. He's still happy, and is pretty cheerful. I just don't want to see him wither away. I spent a lot of the night crying just holding him and he kept on licking my tears away. I know I sound very melodramatic, but I hate to slowly watch something that I care about fade away.
To make matters more frustrating, I can't seem to concentrate on my work. Moreover, when I saw my wash out to dry, I noticed that my mom ruined my new brown shirt that I absolutely adore in the wash. Obviously the bleach got to it, and my mom didn't admit that it could have been her fault. I feel a bit bad for being harsh with my mom because she does so much for me, but I just feel extremely frustrated right now. When I made myself coffee in a last attempt to motivate myself, I realized that the cream that I used was way over its expiry date.
Basically, anything that's coloured brown is just going to cause me misery today.