Back from Naziland... 4 days later.
So I left California on tuesday very early in the morning (local time) and arrived home a good 28 hours later. And that was wednesday night (local time again).
The return journey was not as epic as the outward journey but probably only because I was focusing on getting the hell out of there and as far away as an airport as possible.
I suppose you already know that every time you enter an airport with the intention of taking a flight to anywhere, you'd better forget you're a human being, you'd better pack your dignity and check it in with your suitcase, cause no matter what, they'll still snatch it away from you at the first occasion. And if you happen to take 7 flights in 3 weeks, you might end up feeling like they took away your soul, raped it and gave it back to you into pieces, which you'll have time to put back together during the flight. What's exhausting is not travelling, it's this unhuman lands called airports.
As I reached the check in counter and heard the expression "excess luggage" one more time, I gave up on protesting, explaining or begging and just took my credit card out to get it over with. I saw my yellow monster vanishing through one of their gates of hell and went to next step: security.
As I was passing the metal detector in socks (pretty soon we'll have to go through security in underwear I'm pretty sure of that, it will happen in a not so distant future, and that day I'll just stop travelling by plane), one of their security robot told me that she had to open my bag. She took my extremely dangerous bottle of water out of it and told me that it was not allowed and walked away with it without even asking if I wanted to drink it first or anything. She didn't looked at me in the eyes the whole time. I wanted to shout something back at her but since I didn't want to see the inside of an American prison, I thought the better of it and kept focusing on leaving Naziland.
In Chicago, I got confronted to the CTA's mysterious ways to transfer from Midway to o'Hare, and it seemed that I was not street smart enough to figure out how to get a transfer pass that costs 2$ with a 10$ note and no place to get change anywhere, and nothing that looked like a human being to ask questions to anywhere around either. So I sacrified my last money to get a fucking pass that I didn't really need. And of course when I finally saw someone hidden behind a bullet proof window I was told that they coud do nothing for me anyway. Leaving Naziland... Leaving Naziland... Just keep moving on.
Once I was installed in the EL, I realized that I got tickled by the Mess Fairy when I was packing, since what I use to listen to music when I travel was definitely in my bag, but the headphones were not. They must have been swallowed by a couch by now anyway so no need to regret them, but I was pissed cause that would mean no music until home and that sucked so much that I would have to find an alternative solution. What a loser I am!
Got to O'Hare alright. Played another game of absurd security with the robots there. But I almost forgot to play a very important game. As I was looking for my gate, I saw a line of people waiting to use machines, and I thought it was weird since they all had their passeports out. After a second look I found out that it was a Homeland Security gambling machine, except that you gamble with your finger prints and the picture of your face, and if you gamble properly you might be able to re-enter the territory one day. So basically you're supposed to check out from the United States and get a receipt from your check out, except that no one tells you that you have to do it at any time. Which is interesting because if you forget to check out your body from the American territory, you might never be able to re-enter it ever. It's a very efficient way to screen potential terrorists, isn't it? La di da. Let's not think twice about what would have happened if I hadn't checked out and board the plane that will take me back to Europe.
Travelling on Aer Lingus is always a pleasure. I had a whole 4 seats row to myself during the whole flight. So I managed to sleep most of the time. And before I left I took a headset from them so I could listen to music while wandering around in Dublin for the day. And since the headset had green shamrocks on each side, I totally fit un Dublin. :p
Dublin was grey and foggy and even rainy in the afternoon, but I remembered the main places and directions so it was not too bad. I think that my favorite place in Dublin is still the Irish Film Institute. It's a nice place, there's a nice café/restaurant, they have an interesting book shop, and of course they show good movies. When I arrived there it was packed with a bunch of old Irish people. I had to look at the programm to understand that they were going to the Premiere of The Good German. I wish I could have gone with them but it was only for people 60+ of age. Oh well... My goal in Dublin that day was to find a way to escape paying excess luggage to fucking Ryanair. Cause I knew how heavy was my yellow monster, and I knew how much they charge the extra kilos, so there was no way I would let them screw me on the way back. I bought a carry on bag to unload my suitcase and take some stuff with me in the cabin, but no liquids of course, because mapple syrup and honey are definitely dangerous liquids you know, you never know, I might be able to stick the staff fingers with the honey and threaten to blind the pilot with the syrup. Whatever. Even after doing this, my suitcase was still too heavy. I don't know how I got away with it, but the girl at the counter just said it was ok but I should be careful about not having excess luggage the next time. Either it was my lucky day or she just got laid the night before and was still in a good mood.
And finally Charleroi customs, then Brussels by bus, then home by streecar and I was here. Without the keys, as agreed with Delphine when I left. Except that when I rang the door no one answered. I rang and rang again, nothing. I started getting pissed. But when I tried to use my cell phone to call her it was out of batteries, and I was stuck outside of the building after technology failed me. Once a loser, always a loser as the saying goes.
I was beyong the point of being respectful of social codes so I rang the neighbours above us, and the guy answered. I explained the situation to him and he immediatly came downstairs to open the door, he helped me carry my suitcase to the 3rd floor, and let me plug my phone at his place so I could call Delphine. Thank god for my nice neighbour from above who was there and not asleep. Delphine came back home pedaling as fast as she could, and I was finally home at last. And I could turn into my human being shape again, and take my dignity out of my suitcase.
Since then I haven't done much. I barely got out of the apartment in 4 days. I thought that arriving late at night and going straight to bed would prevent me from being jet lagged but it didn't work. Two days after I couldn't sleep at night and was exhausted in the middle of the afternoon and so on the next night. I just procrastinate in nothingness all day long and do nothing when I could do plenty of things. I'm gonna go back to work pretty soon so I suppose everything should be back to normal soon enough. It's just distressing to come back from a long journey, and have nothing to expect or to wait for for a while. But I'll get over it eventually. I'll just make new projects.
I'll try to post the pictures from California tomorrow, and then I guess my entries will go back to French and friends only.
The return journey was not as epic as the outward journey but probably only because I was focusing on getting the hell out of there and as far away as an airport as possible.
I suppose you already know that every time you enter an airport with the intention of taking a flight to anywhere, you'd better forget you're a human being, you'd better pack your dignity and check it in with your suitcase, cause no matter what, they'll still snatch it away from you at the first occasion. And if you happen to take 7 flights in 3 weeks, you might end up feeling like they took away your soul, raped it and gave it back to you into pieces, which you'll have time to put back together during the flight. What's exhausting is not travelling, it's this unhuman lands called airports.
As I reached the check in counter and heard the expression "excess luggage" one more time, I gave up on protesting, explaining or begging and just took my credit card out to get it over with. I saw my yellow monster vanishing through one of their gates of hell and went to next step: security.
As I was passing the metal detector in socks (pretty soon we'll have to go through security in underwear I'm pretty sure of that, it will happen in a not so distant future, and that day I'll just stop travelling by plane), one of their security robot told me that she had to open my bag. She took my extremely dangerous bottle of water out of it and told me that it was not allowed and walked away with it without even asking if I wanted to drink it first or anything. She didn't looked at me in the eyes the whole time. I wanted to shout something back at her but since I didn't want to see the inside of an American prison, I thought the better of it and kept focusing on leaving Naziland.
In Chicago, I got confronted to the CTA's mysterious ways to transfer from Midway to o'Hare, and it seemed that I was not street smart enough to figure out how to get a transfer pass that costs 2$ with a 10$ note and no place to get change anywhere, and nothing that looked like a human being to ask questions to anywhere around either. So I sacrified my last money to get a fucking pass that I didn't really need. And of course when I finally saw someone hidden behind a bullet proof window I was told that they coud do nothing for me anyway. Leaving Naziland... Leaving Naziland... Just keep moving on.
Once I was installed in the EL, I realized that I got tickled by the Mess Fairy when I was packing, since what I use to listen to music when I travel was definitely in my bag, but the headphones were not. They must have been swallowed by a couch by now anyway so no need to regret them, but I was pissed cause that would mean no music until home and that sucked so much that I would have to find an alternative solution. What a loser I am!
Got to O'Hare alright. Played another game of absurd security with the robots there. But I almost forgot to play a very important game. As I was looking for my gate, I saw a line of people waiting to use machines, and I thought it was weird since they all had their passeports out. After a second look I found out that it was a Homeland Security gambling machine, except that you gamble with your finger prints and the picture of your face, and if you gamble properly you might be able to re-enter the territory one day. So basically you're supposed to check out from the United States and get a receipt from your check out, except that no one tells you that you have to do it at any time. Which is interesting because if you forget to check out your body from the American territory, you might never be able to re-enter it ever. It's a very efficient way to screen potential terrorists, isn't it? La di da. Let's not think twice about what would have happened if I hadn't checked out and board the plane that will take me back to Europe.
Travelling on Aer Lingus is always a pleasure. I had a whole 4 seats row to myself during the whole flight. So I managed to sleep most of the time. And before I left I took a headset from them so I could listen to music while wandering around in Dublin for the day. And since the headset had green shamrocks on each side, I totally fit un Dublin. :p
Dublin was grey and foggy and even rainy in the afternoon, but I remembered the main places and directions so it was not too bad. I think that my favorite place in Dublin is still the Irish Film Institute. It's a nice place, there's a nice café/restaurant, they have an interesting book shop, and of course they show good movies. When I arrived there it was packed with a bunch of old Irish people. I had to look at the programm to understand that they were going to the Premiere of The Good German. I wish I could have gone with them but it was only for people 60+ of age. Oh well... My goal in Dublin that day was to find a way to escape paying excess luggage to fucking Ryanair. Cause I knew how heavy was my yellow monster, and I knew how much they charge the extra kilos, so there was no way I would let them screw me on the way back. I bought a carry on bag to unload my suitcase and take some stuff with me in the cabin, but no liquids of course, because mapple syrup and honey are definitely dangerous liquids you know, you never know, I might be able to stick the staff fingers with the honey and threaten to blind the pilot with the syrup. Whatever. Even after doing this, my suitcase was still too heavy. I don't know how I got away with it, but the girl at the counter just said it was ok but I should be careful about not having excess luggage the next time. Either it was my lucky day or she just got laid the night before and was still in a good mood.
And finally Charleroi customs, then Brussels by bus, then home by streecar and I was here. Without the keys, as agreed with Delphine when I left. Except that when I rang the door no one answered. I rang and rang again, nothing. I started getting pissed. But when I tried to use my cell phone to call her it was out of batteries, and I was stuck outside of the building after technology failed me. Once a loser, always a loser as the saying goes.
I was beyong the point of being respectful of social codes so I rang the neighbours above us, and the guy answered. I explained the situation to him and he immediatly came downstairs to open the door, he helped me carry my suitcase to the 3rd floor, and let me plug my phone at his place so I could call Delphine. Thank god for my nice neighbour from above who was there and not asleep. Delphine came back home pedaling as fast as she could, and I was finally home at last. And I could turn into my human being shape again, and take my dignity out of my suitcase.
Since then I haven't done much. I barely got out of the apartment in 4 days. I thought that arriving late at night and going straight to bed would prevent me from being jet lagged but it didn't work. Two days after I couldn't sleep at night and was exhausted in the middle of the afternoon and so on the next night. I just procrastinate in nothingness all day long and do nothing when I could do plenty of things. I'm gonna go back to work pretty soon so I suppose everything should be back to normal soon enough. It's just distressing to come back from a long journey, and have nothing to expect or to wait for for a while. But I'll get over it eventually. I'll just make new projects.
I'll try to post the pictures from California tomorrow, and then I guess my entries will go back to French and friends only.