slowdancing is best with two people

Apr 06, 2006 13:04

shhhhh, I'm in the library. I'm at school and I know why.. . .but I'm not doing very well, I keep telling myself to become a better student, to study, and make grades I can be proud of, yet I find myself filling my free time between work and school with reading and skating, and music, and drinking, and smoking(pot), and tripping, and conversation, and various social endeavors, and i just feel like I cant't keep my head on straight.I'm overflowing with ambitions and aspirations, but I don't work hard to achieve those things. I want everything to fall into my lap I guess.

No one wants to play music with me and I think I might explode for lack of it. I think I will explode. soon. I am starved and desperate. For the things I want, for the people I want to meet, for the dreams in my head. It feels like everybody is waiting. Like there is this intense feeling of repression in the air, I repress my energy, wait for my move, wait till the time is right and then BAM!! that's when I make my move, but I feel if I wait much longer I'll die. I can't sit still. I want to live my dreams and be happy and not become an eternal inmate in this life that fearful people have created for me. "work your job, do your work, get your pay, spend your pay, complain about it, sleep, repeat" That's the tune I dance to. But the cosmic disc jockey must be getting tired, maybe some new music will play and I'll stop slow dancing and begin Waltzing. Hey, when all else fails, do the twist.
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