(no subject)
Today I got bored, so I decided to look through the house. I found my dad's old record collection. It has The Beatles: "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band", The Doors: "Morrison Hotel" and "Weird Scenes Inside the Gold Mine", Jimi Hendrix: "Electric Lady Land" and "Axis: Bold as Love", Led Zeppelin: I, III, and IV, and other cool stuff. Saw "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" yesterday. It was kind of like a Seinfeld episode; it was entertaining, but didn't have much of a plot. And I got those Red Hot Chili Peppers CD's since my last post, and Jeff burned "Family Guy Live in Las Vegas" for me. Most of the tracks are pretty much hilarious, esspecially "All Cartoons Are Fuckn' Dicks".
[Peter]:On Monday I had drinks with Barney Rubble.
We hit a couple divey little bars.
We noticed there was quite a lovely lady
Sittin' at the table next to ours.
Now Barney, who was pretty friggin' wasted,
Got up and stumbled stumbled over with a groan.
He said, "Hey, just between us
My Neanderthalic penis
Is as massive as a Stegosaurus bone."
Chorus:
All cartoons
Are fuckn' dicks
They get their kicks
From being pricks
It's a quirk
We just can't fix
Cause all cartoons
Are fuckn' dicks
[Brian]: One day I met an ape of great charisma.
Magilla the Gorilla was his name.
He wore a little hat and matching bow-tie,
A fashion that has brought him great acclaim
I said, "What do you see as your career peak,
Of all your many flashy escapades?"
He said, "Well this is funky,
But you're looking at the monkey
Who's responsible for bringing you the AIDS."
Chorus
[Lois]: I had a conversation at a party
With famous rabbit hunter, Elmer Fudd.
He told me I just had to see his rifle,
And dropped it on the table with a 'thud'
I said to him, "It's quite a lovely firearm."
He told me his fiance likes it, too.
He said, "This may be corny,
But it really gets me horny
When I press it to her temple while we screw."
Chorus
[Chris]: On Friday night I went to get some candy,
Some soda and some chips and other stuff.
Along the way I passed a little alley
And there I saw that K-9 cop, McGruff
I said to him, "Hey, you're that famous crime dog!"
He said, "I only work from 9 to 5,
And now it's close to ten-ish
And I've got a job to finish
Cause, as you can see, this hooker's still alive."
Chorus
[Stewie]: One day, while I was strolling through the forest,
I happened on some mushroom-covered turf.
And there from underneath a patch of fungus
Emerged the one and only Papa Smurf.
He said, "This is our Secret Mushroom Village."
I said, "Then I'm the first to see these views?"
He said, "I'm only kiddin'
'Cause we only keep it hidden
From the Asians, Arabs, faggots, Blacks, and Jews."
Chorus
[Meg]: One day I met a......
[Peter]: Holy crap, look who's here, it's Jason Alexander!
[Meg]: But I was suppoed to go next....
[Lois]: Quiet, honey. Mr. Alexander wants to talk.
[Jason]: I once met Scooby Doo at a premier bash.
He looked a little haggard, and he stunk.
He said the trouble started last December
When Daphne made a pass while she was drunk.
And now he's got a child outta wed-lock
It's dealing his career a fatal blow
I asked him, "Where's the baby?"
He said, "Jason, buddy, maybe
Now you see why fuckin' Scrappy's gotta go."
Chorus
There were also little parts where the characters talked in between verses about the previous one, but I'm too lazy to listen carefully and get it down.
[Peter]:On Monday I had drinks with Barney Rubble.
We hit a couple divey little bars.
We noticed there was quite a lovely lady
Sittin' at the table next to ours.
Now Barney, who was pretty friggin' wasted,
Got up and stumbled stumbled over with a groan.
He said, "Hey, just between us
My Neanderthalic penis
Is as massive as a Stegosaurus bone."
Chorus:
All cartoons
Are fuckn' dicks
They get their kicks
From being pricks
It's a quirk
We just can't fix
Cause all cartoons
Are fuckn' dicks
[Brian]: One day I met an ape of great charisma.
Magilla the Gorilla was his name.
He wore a little hat and matching bow-tie,
A fashion that has brought him great acclaim
I said, "What do you see as your career peak,
Of all your many flashy escapades?"
He said, "Well this is funky,
But you're looking at the monkey
Who's responsible for bringing you the AIDS."
Chorus
[Lois]: I had a conversation at a party
With famous rabbit hunter, Elmer Fudd.
He told me I just had to see his rifle,
And dropped it on the table with a 'thud'
I said to him, "It's quite a lovely firearm."
He told me his fiance likes it, too.
He said, "This may be corny,
But it really gets me horny
When I press it to her temple while we screw."
Chorus
[Chris]: On Friday night I went to get some candy,
Some soda and some chips and other stuff.
Along the way I passed a little alley
And there I saw that K-9 cop, McGruff
I said to him, "Hey, you're that famous crime dog!"
He said, "I only work from 9 to 5,
And now it's close to ten-ish
And I've got a job to finish
Cause, as you can see, this hooker's still alive."
Chorus
[Stewie]: One day, while I was strolling through the forest,
I happened on some mushroom-covered turf.
And there from underneath a patch of fungus
Emerged the one and only Papa Smurf.
He said, "This is our Secret Mushroom Village."
I said, "Then I'm the first to see these views?"
He said, "I'm only kiddin'
'Cause we only keep it hidden
From the Asians, Arabs, faggots, Blacks, and Jews."
Chorus
[Meg]: One day I met a......
[Peter]: Holy crap, look who's here, it's Jason Alexander!
[Meg]: But I was suppoed to go next....
[Lois]: Quiet, honey. Mr. Alexander wants to talk.
[Jason]: I once met Scooby Doo at a premier bash.
He looked a little haggard, and he stunk.
He said the trouble started last December
When Daphne made a pass while she was drunk.
And now he's got a child outta wed-lock
It's dealing his career a fatal blow
I asked him, "Where's the baby?"
He said, "Jason, buddy, maybe
Now you see why fuckin' Scrappy's gotta go."
Chorus
There were also little parts where the characters talked in between verses about the previous one, but I'm too lazy to listen carefully and get it down.