Help/advice please if possible
Yes - I am still alive but just been hibernating.
A girlfriend of mine called me last night to tell me her 10 year old daughter has Langerhans' Cell Histiocytosis. It's not exactly cancer but is treated in the same fashion. She's having chemo atm (luckily it's a low dosage) but is currently confined to a wheelchair.
Her mum's been told that under 5 ( Read more... )
Secondly, in order to answer your request for suggestions.
I don't have cancer but do have crohn's disease and have been on chemotherapy drugs for five months, with the idea that this will be an indefinite method of treatment for me.
As parents, our main concern is to give as much of ourselves as possible to our children. Particularly in circumstances like this. My very first bit of advice to you is that the parents need to set aside some time for themselves. It sounds cruel and heartless, especially if they're thinking that time with that child might be running out. But it's only by keeping our sense of self that we remain strong and don't build up 1) the possibility of resentment towards the sick one and 2) the possibility of them feeling guilty for taking all our time.
My other suggestion is that if the child has siblings, parents should take shifts - one with the sick child, and one with the healthy one/s. This way the healthy ones aren't hanging around hospitals or sick beds being bored and feeling left out. It only takes one person to be around for Miss Sicky. Take the healthy one out to do something for them on their own terms, their own interests.
Chemo is exhausting. The muscles will hurt, the joints will ache, and it makes you feel ill. Chances are that the sick child will just want to have some peace and quiet and no fretting parent hovering over her. I'd suggest taking a couple of books and magazines and sitting next to each other just reading, cuddled under a blanket. The contact is very comforting and the quiet time can be really beneficial. Obviously this depends on the personality of the child but it's worth a try.
At this time, it's possible that friends of the family will offer their help. "If there's anything I can do..." YES, take the help. You'd have to be specific about what you need them to do though. Ask them to get the groceries for you. Ask them to take the sick kid shift for an evening so the parents can get grown-up time. Ask them to take healthy kid for an overnight stay if they have kids the same age. Ask them to pick kids up from school etc. Spread the load around, it makes things easier for parents and makes friends feel valued.
Good luck with this. ♥
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