Girl Scouts: God's Drug Pushers?
Is it just me, or are all parents and administrators of elementary school students genetically predisposed to stupidity?
Example: "Bags of sugar get kids nailed"
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Allow me to cut and chew to some choice cuts of prime rib o' stupidity for my readers:
Superintendent Chuck Breiner said he fully supported the disciplinary action. "I believe we need to send a clear message that modeling drug trafficking in school and selling, however innocent the material, would still be considered unsafe."
So, what, he wants government subsidization and corporatization of the happy powder?
Someone should tell him that the ENTIRE IDEA OF FREE-ENTERPRISE LENDS ITSELF TO DRUG TRAFFICKING. I suppose real drug traffickers operate more like Micorsoft than your average mom n' pop liquor store, though. Go capitalism!
Craig Yaldoo, director of the state's Office of Drug Control Policy, said the district did the right thing by sending a strong message disapproving of drug use. "I applaud the school administrators for taking a responsible stance in trying to teach students that emotional well-being is not tied to a happy powder."
Yes! We should, instead, teach students that emotional well-being is tied to pills, like prozac, paxil, zoloft, and other SSRI's!
Also, children like candy. This is a known fucking fact. They were selling a powder, a powder which could be classified as candy. In their infinite wisdom, they realized that amongst their peers, candy equates happiness. SO THEY CALLED IT FUCKING HAPPY POWDER BECAUSE IT MAKES THEM HAPPY, NOT BECAUSE THEY WANT TO SNORT COKE FROM A HOOKERS ASS, LIKE SOME IDIOTS THAT ARE SITTING IN OFFICE, WHO'S NAMES RHYME WITH "GEORGE W. USH."
She also said that as the parent of a third-grader, she finds it scary to think some students might not have known what they were ingesting.
I suppose she grows all of her own food and is a nutritionist? Because that sure as fuck would be the only way she would know exactly what her kids are ingesting. I'm sure her kids don't know what "High Fructose corn syrup" is, yet it's probably in 90% of the foods they ingest.
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This really makes you wonder: Should we really be teaching students (and parents!) that emotional well-being is tied to girl scout cookies? Those things are more addictive than crack. Fucking girl scouts.
Also, does anyone else find it amusing that there is a classification of girl scout known as the "brownie scouts"? One website describes them with, "Most Brownie Girl Scouts are very active. They are full of imagination and fantasy, enjoy 'make believe' and dressing up, like to be in a small group, and want to be very helpful."
That's just dripping with sexual innuendos. I suppose the Daisy Scouts aren't certified citizens of Downtown Browntown yet?
Example: "Bags of sugar get kids nailed"
----
Allow me to cut and chew to some choice cuts of prime rib o' stupidity for my readers:
Superintendent Chuck Breiner said he fully supported the disciplinary action. "I believe we need to send a clear message that modeling drug trafficking in school and selling, however innocent the material, would still be considered unsafe."
So, what, he wants government subsidization and corporatization of the happy powder?
Someone should tell him that the ENTIRE IDEA OF FREE-ENTERPRISE LENDS ITSELF TO DRUG TRAFFICKING. I suppose real drug traffickers operate more like Micorsoft than your average mom n' pop liquor store, though. Go capitalism!
Craig Yaldoo, director of the state's Office of Drug Control Policy, said the district did the right thing by sending a strong message disapproving of drug use. "I applaud the school administrators for taking a responsible stance in trying to teach students that emotional well-being is not tied to a happy powder."
Yes! We should, instead, teach students that emotional well-being is tied to pills, like prozac, paxil, zoloft, and other SSRI's!
Also, children like candy. This is a known fucking fact. They were selling a powder, a powder which could be classified as candy. In their infinite wisdom, they realized that amongst their peers, candy equates happiness. SO THEY CALLED IT FUCKING HAPPY POWDER BECAUSE IT MAKES THEM HAPPY, NOT BECAUSE THEY WANT TO SNORT COKE FROM A HOOKERS ASS, LIKE SOME IDIOTS THAT ARE SITTING IN OFFICE, WHO'S NAMES RHYME WITH "GEORGE W. USH."
She also said that as the parent of a third-grader, she finds it scary to think some students might not have known what they were ingesting.
I suppose she grows all of her own food and is a nutritionist? Because that sure as fuck would be the only way she would know exactly what her kids are ingesting. I'm sure her kids don't know what "High Fructose corn syrup" is, yet it's probably in 90% of the foods they ingest.
-----
This really makes you wonder: Should we really be teaching students (and parents!) that emotional well-being is tied to girl scout cookies? Those things are more addictive than crack. Fucking girl scouts.
Also, does anyone else find it amusing that there is a classification of girl scout known as the "brownie scouts"? One website describes them with, "Most Brownie Girl Scouts are very active. They are full of imagination and fantasy, enjoy 'make believe' and dressing up, like to be in a small group, and want to be very helpful."
That's just dripping with sexual innuendos. I suppose the Daisy Scouts aren't certified citizens of Downtown Browntown yet?