Yay..or more like BOO
I feel like writing, so I'll write now. Today was ok..I woke up late because I went to bed late, which I can't do again..it fucked with my body and sleeping time, which isn't good before school..but eh what am I going to do..Tomorow is my first day and I can't expect anything...yeah...but I get to hang out with Liz after so that should be good..I don't quite know what I'm feeling..I wish I could tell Donna something to help her in this "situation" but..as I told her..I'm not into relationships anymore..infact I really hate them..I'm not sure if I want another one ever...I would I guess..but the person would have to agree to my terms..and those..I doubt anyone will agree to..but someone may..I don't know if I even want them to though..I think friends are better..and relationship wise..I have a horrid outlook on women...yeah..I've been let down too many times..I know that everyone's not like that..but I don't feel it's worth it anymore to keep looking...so I'm working on getting rid of that part of me..it'll take a while..but I can do it..I know it's a part of everyone and something that makes us human..but..I don't want to be human if it involves that...I decided that I just want to have a happy life..and that's it..I'll do whatever it takes to achive that. I think it's important to have a happy life..we've all got one...how you live it is up to you and you alone..if you chose to believe lies because they make you more comfortable and that makes you happy, so be it..but me..I just want to be happy...All the problems in a relationship never make me happy..I'm never happy in a relationship..it's always me giving to the other person and getting almost nothing back..then it ends and I'm the only one hurt because I was the one who didn't lie..what's with that? I don't feel like wasting time with that shit..and I laugh at every married person..they'll never know what a waste it was.....working to fix stupid little problems with people....what a pointless effort..what a waste...you spend so much time with someone if you want to get married..then you spend countless times fighting..making up and going though that cycle..alot of all of that is over things that don't even matter..but people give into it because this is how people are "supposed to be"...I don't agree with that anymore..if I could I'd leave and go live off the land in the wild..but the human race has evolved too far fo that to work..so that's too bad for me..anyway I don't know anyone who would want to read this entry....so..thanks for caring as much as you do if you took the time out of your life to sit here and try and see what's happening in mine because you care...of maybe you were just so bored..you had nothing better to do..whichever it is..thanks anyway..
~ Alex
~ Alex