"He played guitar like a master - but faster"
So. Wow. It's been awhile and too much has happened to summarize. BillyFeast is this weekend, and I am looking forward to it more than a sugar-crazed 8-year old would look forward to Christmas. And that's a lot. Sex Panda is having a reunion. Dear Boss and Hockey are coming back to play, and the freshman have never met them. I AM ECSTATIC. And there's no way to express my excitement in this journal entry.
What else? Classes are good. Went to San Diego last weekend. Hoping to go to Green Fest in San Fran in a couple of weeks, but who knows how that will go. Erica and I are hopefully going to see Our Lady Peace on the 27th...
I also finished my grad contract; that is, as finished as can be at this point. I'm meeting with Kevin tomarrow to talk about it more. Read it
Nyssa Grazda
Fall 2004-May 2008
Title: Contemporary and 20th Century Music and Film Criticism
“Don’t ask me why I obsessively look to rock ’n’ roll bands for some kind of model for a better society. I guess it’s just that I glimpsed something beautiful in a flashbulb moment once, and perhaps mistaking it for prophecy have been seeking its fulfillment ever since.” - Lester Bangs
It appears that it’s time to begin planning my life, and in many ways I feel that I am now ready for that undertaking. It’s taken me a long time, perhaps even too long, to figure out What I Want To Do, which is thus: to immerse myself completely in music and film criticism, using creative writing and philosophy to convey the bond between social and musical constructs. Swinging myself into criticism seems like a morbidly rapid U-turn in my educational career, one that I am apprehensive about, but apprehensive in that pleasant way which accompanies a fantastic adventure.
But I digress. I should explain how I came to this conclusion.
Until recently, the only thought I had for my poorly conceived future was that I was going to write, or, to be more politically correct, that I was going to be “a writer”. The only sentiment I was expressing was that I wanted to “reach people”, which to give some indication, is the same feeling one gets in a dark room groping for anything that might make the light turn on. Great I thought. I want to write…What do I want to convey?
Philosophy has always been a deep-rooted interest with me, because I love questions but am never fully satisfied with answers. So it seemed only natural that I should attempt to write about philosophy. All summer I read philosophical essays and re-learned Nietzschian theories because I was going to be a Writer of Philosophy.
Sure. Okay. But,*and here’s the important part*, in conjunction with my learned musings, I was working two jobs to ensure that I could have enough money to update my CD collection and copies of Rolling Stone. This initially innocent pastime abruptly rose to addiction, and I began a quest for more knowledge to satiate my music cravings, hunting through my aunt’s collection of old records and parsing their cover art, their producers, and lyrics which held my interest far more than philosophical discourse, and, indeed, sometimes held all the existential vigor I needed and desired.
Perhaps I was naïve to my calling for longer than necessary. This is partially due to the fact that I’ve been critiquing music and film for so long anyway, but I simply haven’t expressed it in a classroom setting, or for that matter really considered it a course of study. My room is floor to ceiling an expression of music and film tastes, but criticism is an obsession that I unleash mostly on my friends when they least expect it, and then we inevitably argue about which musician was the most culturally significant, or what who was trying to express with which album, or how image plays a factor.
And so, recently, I told my friend Graham, “I think music is going to be in my emphasis.” Graham simply scoffed, giving me a look that suggested this should have been apparent to me months ago. “About time,” he said, returning to what he was doing previously.
Why hadn’t I thought of music? Maybe because my love for music has been integral to my life for so long that I often forget it is an interest and not an inherent quality in sentient beings. It has become a part of me, something easy to conjure but hard to articulate.
It was inescapable. My Dad played drums, piano and guitar. He loves jazz, is an avid Kinks fan, and has retained what seems like an internal catalog of information about Billboard hits in the 1960’s. His understanding of music criticism and theory never ceased to amaze me, and so I always took careful note of his words. I find myself, at 19, knowing a plethora of random facts about musicians and their work.
My Mom was a DeadHead, a term coined to reveal the intense and sometimes needless idolization of Grateful Dead fans. She also got me interested in blues, and new-agey music which always seems to leave me energized but slightly uneasy. When it all comes down to it though, my mom is still mourning the death of Jerry Garcia, and some part of her will always be at a concert in the early 70’s.
But hell, it was the hippie era. Oh, music. What have you left me with now? Typical normative standards of music are dying out. Pure “Rock”, in any definitive form, is no more. “Punk” isn’t punk - it has branched off into ska and emo and screamo. No one even wants to give jazz a try anymore, despite the fact that it is one of the most melodically diverse genres of music ever to be conceived. But if you like 9 colorful adjectives strung together to describe a sound, you’ll love the new music coming out. Every genre of music is blending together into a sound that people find hard to encapsulate with just one word.
But then, so are we as a culture. We have become SO homogenized, and I find it interesting that music has reflected that quality. Everyone is walking around now in a haze of muddled identity. What happened to creative integrity?
While Music is What I Will Study, Creative Writing is my method of communication. I had originally intended to go the route of Fiction, but I recognize now that Non-Fiction is a potentially a superior route to travel. I knew a long time ago that I was better at being myself than emulating someone else. Even in my fiction work my voice is distinct. It’s sarcastic and cynical and I like it. Denying non-fiction would be denying the inevitable.
The longest and most developed piece of writing I’ve ever produced was a novel about my freshman year of high school, which I wrote in my sophomore year of high school. That should say something. Writers always think that their own lives are terribly complex and intriguing and worth reading about. I’m not saying I necessarily adhere to, or even condone, that train of thought.
But the fact that my first major fore into writing was essentially a travelogue should have brought something to light awhile ago. In those 92 pages, I did a pretty good job at conveying the situational irony that surrounded that year. And, oh, how it was filled with personal observations on culture and philosophy. Much to my surprise and delight, the novel not only captured the essence of how adolescence uprooted and warped my ideas of society, but it was witty too! I hope to continue to produce witty commentaries, but now I also wish to utilize my writing to showcase and analyze genres of music and their respective artists.
Film will also tie into this goodybag of cultural discourse. I’m interested in film production, but, like music studies, would prefer to concentrate my studies on film critique and analysis. In recent years, various films have been tackling deeper philosophical questions, and I would love to do an intensive study on a screenwriter-director, to examine their influences and see what messages they attempt to convey through their films. In addition, being compositionally inclined, I would be interested in taking a screenwriting class, as this could integrate creative writing and film. I especially want to undertake an Independent Study on how music is utilized in film to convey mood and specifically dramatic tension.
Questions I Want Answered: So what can we say about music and film and media’s affect on pop culture and society? Certainly artist’s music and intentions cannot be understood without acknowledging the era. What impact did the album have at the time it was released? What philosophies did bands hold, and how is this reflected in their music and image (I want to do an independent study specifically on Philosophy and Music of the 1960’s)? Who used their music to become cultural revolutionaries, and who is in the middle of that process today? And then…
How can I communicate this through non-fiction? To let my sarcasm run rampant would be potentially dangerous and hilarious. But I also want to be a consoling voice offering musical therapy to beleaguered ears. I want to traverse through literary and cultural boundaries. More than that, I want to try to get a grasp of the worldview that coincides with genres of music. How does music critique culture? How do certain genres reflect political or social upheaval, as, in retrospect, some music trends seem completely ridiculous unless one is looking at the time period alongside?
I want to use my Johnston education to prepare for a career that would let me assess where musical genres are going and understand how they developed. This is my passion, and I am pleased that I can utilize my time here promoting my future self.
Abroad
I believe that an abroad experience at the University of Westminster in London, England would expand my worldview and be a tremendous cross cultural experience. The University gives a variety of spring courses dealing with music and film criticism, so I would focus specifically on those classes while there. While in London I also want to communicate with as many different people as possible, to learn different views and dissenting opinions. England and America speak the same language but have vastly different cultural perspectives and I can’t wait to explore another country on an in-depth level. My second reason is for inspiration. England has always been a magical place, and has influenced several of my fiction works. With a myriad of social and intellectual learning opportunities, I’m sure there will never be a lack of stimulation.
So that's that. It's all there except for my senior project; and my title is still in the works. I feel SO much more optimistic about the future now. It seems the lull is over, in some ways at least. Goodnite world. I'm tired.
~Nyssa
What else? Classes are good. Went to San Diego last weekend. Hoping to go to Green Fest in San Fran in a couple of weeks, but who knows how that will go. Erica and I are hopefully going to see Our Lady Peace on the 27th...
I also finished my grad contract; that is, as finished as can be at this point. I'm meeting with Kevin tomarrow to talk about it more. Read it
Nyssa Grazda
Fall 2004-May 2008
Title: Contemporary and 20th Century Music and Film Criticism
“Don’t ask me why I obsessively look to rock ’n’ roll bands for some kind of model for a better society. I guess it’s just that I glimpsed something beautiful in a flashbulb moment once, and perhaps mistaking it for prophecy have been seeking its fulfillment ever since.” - Lester Bangs
It appears that it’s time to begin planning my life, and in many ways I feel that I am now ready for that undertaking. It’s taken me a long time, perhaps even too long, to figure out What I Want To Do, which is thus: to immerse myself completely in music and film criticism, using creative writing and philosophy to convey the bond between social and musical constructs. Swinging myself into criticism seems like a morbidly rapid U-turn in my educational career, one that I am apprehensive about, but apprehensive in that pleasant way which accompanies a fantastic adventure.
But I digress. I should explain how I came to this conclusion.
Until recently, the only thought I had for my poorly conceived future was that I was going to write, or, to be more politically correct, that I was going to be “a writer”. The only sentiment I was expressing was that I wanted to “reach people”, which to give some indication, is the same feeling one gets in a dark room groping for anything that might make the light turn on. Great I thought. I want to write…What do I want to convey?
Philosophy has always been a deep-rooted interest with me, because I love questions but am never fully satisfied with answers. So it seemed only natural that I should attempt to write about philosophy. All summer I read philosophical essays and re-learned Nietzschian theories because I was going to be a Writer of Philosophy.
Sure. Okay. But,*and here’s the important part*, in conjunction with my learned musings, I was working two jobs to ensure that I could have enough money to update my CD collection and copies of Rolling Stone. This initially innocent pastime abruptly rose to addiction, and I began a quest for more knowledge to satiate my music cravings, hunting through my aunt’s collection of old records and parsing their cover art, their producers, and lyrics which held my interest far more than philosophical discourse, and, indeed, sometimes held all the existential vigor I needed and desired.
Perhaps I was naïve to my calling for longer than necessary. This is partially due to the fact that I’ve been critiquing music and film for so long anyway, but I simply haven’t expressed it in a classroom setting, or for that matter really considered it a course of study. My room is floor to ceiling an expression of music and film tastes, but criticism is an obsession that I unleash mostly on my friends when they least expect it, and then we inevitably argue about which musician was the most culturally significant, or what who was trying to express with which album, or how image plays a factor.
And so, recently, I told my friend Graham, “I think music is going to be in my emphasis.” Graham simply scoffed, giving me a look that suggested this should have been apparent to me months ago. “About time,” he said, returning to what he was doing previously.
Why hadn’t I thought of music? Maybe because my love for music has been integral to my life for so long that I often forget it is an interest and not an inherent quality in sentient beings. It has become a part of me, something easy to conjure but hard to articulate.
It was inescapable. My Dad played drums, piano and guitar. He loves jazz, is an avid Kinks fan, and has retained what seems like an internal catalog of information about Billboard hits in the 1960’s. His understanding of music criticism and theory never ceased to amaze me, and so I always took careful note of his words. I find myself, at 19, knowing a plethora of random facts about musicians and their work.
My Mom was a DeadHead, a term coined to reveal the intense and sometimes needless idolization of Grateful Dead fans. She also got me interested in blues, and new-agey music which always seems to leave me energized but slightly uneasy. When it all comes down to it though, my mom is still mourning the death of Jerry Garcia, and some part of her will always be at a concert in the early 70’s.
But hell, it was the hippie era. Oh, music. What have you left me with now? Typical normative standards of music are dying out. Pure “Rock”, in any definitive form, is no more. “Punk” isn’t punk - it has branched off into ska and emo and screamo. No one even wants to give jazz a try anymore, despite the fact that it is one of the most melodically diverse genres of music ever to be conceived. But if you like 9 colorful adjectives strung together to describe a sound, you’ll love the new music coming out. Every genre of music is blending together into a sound that people find hard to encapsulate with just one word.
But then, so are we as a culture. We have become SO homogenized, and I find it interesting that music has reflected that quality. Everyone is walking around now in a haze of muddled identity. What happened to creative integrity?
While Music is What I Will Study, Creative Writing is my method of communication. I had originally intended to go the route of Fiction, but I recognize now that Non-Fiction is a potentially a superior route to travel. I knew a long time ago that I was better at being myself than emulating someone else. Even in my fiction work my voice is distinct. It’s sarcastic and cynical and I like it. Denying non-fiction would be denying the inevitable.
The longest and most developed piece of writing I’ve ever produced was a novel about my freshman year of high school, which I wrote in my sophomore year of high school. That should say something. Writers always think that their own lives are terribly complex and intriguing and worth reading about. I’m not saying I necessarily adhere to, or even condone, that train of thought.
But the fact that my first major fore into writing was essentially a travelogue should have brought something to light awhile ago. In those 92 pages, I did a pretty good job at conveying the situational irony that surrounded that year. And, oh, how it was filled with personal observations on culture and philosophy. Much to my surprise and delight, the novel not only captured the essence of how adolescence uprooted and warped my ideas of society, but it was witty too! I hope to continue to produce witty commentaries, but now I also wish to utilize my writing to showcase and analyze genres of music and their respective artists.
Film will also tie into this goodybag of cultural discourse. I’m interested in film production, but, like music studies, would prefer to concentrate my studies on film critique and analysis. In recent years, various films have been tackling deeper philosophical questions, and I would love to do an intensive study on a screenwriter-director, to examine their influences and see what messages they attempt to convey through their films. In addition, being compositionally inclined, I would be interested in taking a screenwriting class, as this could integrate creative writing and film. I especially want to undertake an Independent Study on how music is utilized in film to convey mood and specifically dramatic tension.
Questions I Want Answered: So what can we say about music and film and media’s affect on pop culture and society? Certainly artist’s music and intentions cannot be understood without acknowledging the era. What impact did the album have at the time it was released? What philosophies did bands hold, and how is this reflected in their music and image (I want to do an independent study specifically on Philosophy and Music of the 1960’s)? Who used their music to become cultural revolutionaries, and who is in the middle of that process today? And then…
How can I communicate this through non-fiction? To let my sarcasm run rampant would be potentially dangerous and hilarious. But I also want to be a consoling voice offering musical therapy to beleaguered ears. I want to traverse through literary and cultural boundaries. More than that, I want to try to get a grasp of the worldview that coincides with genres of music. How does music critique culture? How do certain genres reflect political or social upheaval, as, in retrospect, some music trends seem completely ridiculous unless one is looking at the time period alongside?
I want to use my Johnston education to prepare for a career that would let me assess where musical genres are going and understand how they developed. This is my passion, and I am pleased that I can utilize my time here promoting my future self.
Abroad
I believe that an abroad experience at the University of Westminster in London, England would expand my worldview and be a tremendous cross cultural experience. The University gives a variety of spring courses dealing with music and film criticism, so I would focus specifically on those classes while there. While in London I also want to communicate with as many different people as possible, to learn different views and dissenting opinions. England and America speak the same language but have vastly different cultural perspectives and I can’t wait to explore another country on an in-depth level. My second reason is for inspiration. England has always been a magical place, and has influenced several of my fiction works. With a myriad of social and intellectual learning opportunities, I’m sure there will never be a lack of stimulation.
So that's that. It's all there except for my senior project; and my title is still in the works. I feel SO much more optimistic about the future now. It seems the lull is over, in some ways at least. Goodnite world. I'm tired.
~Nyssa