no one else is here! I can play my music AS LOUD AS I WANT!!!
4:30 am is a funny time. it's not quite late and it's not quite early. the time between 4 and 5 am seems to be the grey area between night and morning; even though literally, of course, it doesn't start getting grey (and then washed out blue and then pale pink) until a bit later. more to the point, it's a funny time to have one's airport shuttle leave. if I wanted to go to sleep and not loathe getting up, I would have had to go to bed way before midnight. clearly, that's not the path I've chosen to take. instead, I hung out with ben & james & blake (with much appreciation to drew for taking us to various places on the pike that needed to be gone to; I was hoping to hang out with him too but it didn't quite happen). we watched a very, very bad movie about... well, I'm not quite sure what. it was a poker western? with mel gibson? and jodie foster. exactly. but it was a lot of fun. then we wandered back to campus, carrying cases of beer and tossing a frisbee. oh, college. james and I ate ben's chips and then I walked james back to willets and almost fell asleep on the futon. muscled through and am now here, with half an hour left until this shuttle comes. the worst this is that I have an awful feeling that the shuttle will not, in fact, come. and I'll have to take the train, which will still get me there in plenty of time. there is absolutely no reason for me to think this, except for the fact that I added myself to the shuttle list late and never saw it, as such, so don't quite believe that my name is there. it's the same problem I have with getting on the subway or on a bus; I'm never quite sure if I'm going where I'm going until we've already gone a few stops in the right direction, at which point I can relax and assure myself that trusting other people to get me places actually does work.
I'm looking forward to getting to the airport and experiencing its sterile out-of-time-ness. because there will be people there who are moving about as if it's the middle of the afternoon, and fluorescent lights everywhere, and maybe even some coffee. though right now I'm feeling a bit out of time, myself. this is why I love being awake late. it's all stolen time (stolen, of course, from myself and my own inability to deal with sleep-deprivation; this is only okay because I'm going to sleep on all of my flights), and somehow secret, too. even when I'm with people it seems more hidden.
I'm so excited about seeing my family in about 12 hours!!! and being in santa fe will be so nice. I can't wait to read things that aren't for class and take walks and sleep and talk to everyone.
do you know that there are two songs that use some variation on the line "the years are short/but the days are long"?
I'm looking forward to getting to the airport and experiencing its sterile out-of-time-ness. because there will be people there who are moving about as if it's the middle of the afternoon, and fluorescent lights everywhere, and maybe even some coffee. though right now I'm feeling a bit out of time, myself. this is why I love being awake late. it's all stolen time (stolen, of course, from myself and my own inability to deal with sleep-deprivation; this is only okay because I'm going to sleep on all of my flights), and somehow secret, too. even when I'm with people it seems more hidden.
I'm so excited about seeing my family in about 12 hours!!! and being in santa fe will be so nice. I can't wait to read things that aren't for class and take walks and sleep and talk to everyone.
do you know that there are two songs that use some variation on the line "the years are short/but the days are long"?