annan water, oh hear my true love's call...
3 more weeks. How crazy is that. I am so pumped! I'm going to have a Bachelor's of Music! A piece of paper that says I am awesome! But at the same time it's also a piece of paper that says, "Survived school and paid stupid money to go. Good luck finding a job." It's all good. My parents are really proud of me and that's all that really matters to me. Honestly, I am very happy and excited, but seriously, this one is for my parents.
I must say that I am on a journey of cleaning up my life. It's never been entirely clean, but I have allowed some bad habits to creep in this semester. For instance, smoking while going to the Heorot with Eric. I don't even know why I allowed myself to do it. Stupid things that I allow the material world influence me. But I am done with that. I never got addicted and never got the urge to really smoke, it was just something to do. Pretty dumb. I am over it though and it's out of my life.
I have been working out lately like I have said before. The reality of Cedar Point is coming up and I am not sure I am going to make the cut for getting on the Millenium Force or Top Thrill Dragster. If I don't, that's okay! I am still going to have an awesome time at Cedar Point and I am still going to feel good about losing the weight.
I haven't been really in the Word lately or keeping up with any type of spiritual reading. I haven't felt entirely fulfilled with life lately, and I would say that is a reason. It's crazy how great you can really feel after spending time with God and accepting His love for us. He loved us first! 1 John 4:19 MSG, "We, though, are going to love-love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first."
Which makes me question if my decision of not talking to Laura anymore was the right decision. I feel at times no because we are taught to love and not give up. Jesus always loved, and He never gave up on us. However, I get nothing out of her. I can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. I will say that I am not the best evangelist and never will be and that I probably screwed everything up between us as far as friendship and spiritual life goes. For that, I am forever sorry and that is one thing I regret. But seeing her associate herself with the people she does, what am I supposed to do? How do I communicate? And that is one thing I have discussed with some other friends about that really care about her too. We find it sad that she has really gone that route. I'm not saying that I am the best human being on this planet, but that's a whole other issue.
I will say that I haven't given up on her though. I pray EVERY NIGHT for her. I really do. And as much as I don't want to or am too stubborn or upset, I do, because I care. I know that God has something awesome in store for her. I can't do anything because I am human and I am an idiot. I have to hand this one over to God. And it's funny, she was the one that really got it through my head that it's God that is going to do the work, not me... I still smile about things that remind me of her.
Anyway, I think I am going to get some lunch and then head to work.
<3
~trevor
I must say that I am on a journey of cleaning up my life. It's never been entirely clean, but I have allowed some bad habits to creep in this semester. For instance, smoking while going to the Heorot with Eric. I don't even know why I allowed myself to do it. Stupid things that I allow the material world influence me. But I am done with that. I never got addicted and never got the urge to really smoke, it was just something to do. Pretty dumb. I am over it though and it's out of my life.
I have been working out lately like I have said before. The reality of Cedar Point is coming up and I am not sure I am going to make the cut for getting on the Millenium Force or Top Thrill Dragster. If I don't, that's okay! I am still going to have an awesome time at Cedar Point and I am still going to feel good about losing the weight.
I haven't been really in the Word lately or keeping up with any type of spiritual reading. I haven't felt entirely fulfilled with life lately, and I would say that is a reason. It's crazy how great you can really feel after spending time with God and accepting His love for us. He loved us first! 1 John 4:19 MSG, "We, though, are going to love-love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first."
Which makes me question if my decision of not talking to Laura anymore was the right decision. I feel at times no because we are taught to love and not give up. Jesus always loved, and He never gave up on us. However, I get nothing out of her. I can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. I will say that I am not the best evangelist and never will be and that I probably screwed everything up between us as far as friendship and spiritual life goes. For that, I am forever sorry and that is one thing I regret. But seeing her associate herself with the people she does, what am I supposed to do? How do I communicate? And that is one thing I have discussed with some other friends about that really care about her too. We find it sad that she has really gone that route. I'm not saying that I am the best human being on this planet, but that's a whole other issue.
I will say that I haven't given up on her though. I pray EVERY NIGHT for her. I really do. And as much as I don't want to or am too stubborn or upset, I do, because I care. I know that God has something awesome in store for her. I can't do anything because I am human and I am an idiot. I have to hand this one over to God. And it's funny, she was the one that really got it through my head that it's God that is going to do the work, not me... I still smile about things that remind me of her.
Anyway, I think I am going to get some lunch and then head to work.
<3
~trevor