The Palace at Haven, Valdemar, early morning
The sun was warm overhead, almost too warm, but Karal turned his face towards it with a quiet sigh. The morning was peaceful and still and his first true moment off since he'd returned from Fandom.
Altra had gone to Sunhame to deliver a stack of urgent missives to Solaris, things that needed her direct approval rather than that of the Envoy, and Talia had urged him to take the morning for himself. She'd even brought him a guide, the young Heraldic trainee on whose arm Karal's hand rested. Tripping over my own feet as I tried to find my way might not do much for the dignity of Karse, he thought wryly. "I think we're almost there?"
There was a start of surprise from beside him, followed by a, "Yes, sir!", and Karal hid a smile. She was very young. Or maybe it was just that he felt old. A few more steps, and he stretched out his other hand, fingers brushing against the smooth wood of the fence. "You can leave me here, Trenia. I can manage on my own."
"Are you sure, sir?" Her voice was worried, and he could picture her earnest expression.
"If there's one place in Haven I'll be safe, it's Companion's Field, and," he smiled at her, "if I run into a few trees, I'm sure it won't do any harm." It took a few more moments of persuasion, but eventually she left. Karal listened to her footsteps retreat, shaking his head as they stopped rather than fading away. No doubt she'd keep an eye on him, and no doubt she'd ask her Companion to do the same, but he put them out of his mind.
It was easy to slip through the fence, and he paused on the other side to orient himself, then began to walk towards the centre of the field. The almost-silent hoofbeats that joined him after a few minutes weren't a surprise, nor was the warmth he could feel next to him, and he reached out to brush his fingers over one silky shoulder. "Idry?" A soft snort answered him. Florian's youngest sister had made something of a habit out of keeping an eye on him. When he'd been able to snatch some time to walk, he came to Companion's Field; the first time Altra hadn't been with him, she had appointed herself his guide. They didn't talk - as a rule, Companions spoke only with their Chosen - but Karal took comfort in her presence, and he thought she took some from his. While they both knew Florian had gone on to a new life, it didn't stop either of them from missing him.
With one hand on Idry's shoulder he didn't have to think about where he was walking, and the quiet, the warmth and the brush of their feet moving through the grass soon found him lost in thought. It had been weeks since he'd returned. Weeks of non-stop work as he caught up on everything he'd left undone. Seemingly endless meetings, in length and in number, and the half-awed way people stared at him had made him almost wistful for the days when no one had trusted him and half of them had thought he was a traitor. What he'd said to Evey was true: his blindness had turned him into a symbol, and given him the authority that he'd struggled so hard for in the days after Ulrich's death.
Evey. He missed her so much, missed her more than sight. It was as if he'd left part of himself behind when he'd left her; there was a hollowness inside that nothing quite seemed to fill. But it wasn't just her; he missed everyone. He missed Fandom. He missed being just another student. And there the blindness was barely remarked upon. He'd taken to wearing a scarf wrapped around his eyes after Talia had explained that his sightless eyes made some people uncomfortable. Meetings had grown easier after that.
Karal sighed again, not so quietly this time. He'd not even found the time to write, and he felt a twinge of guilt as he realised how long it had been since he left.
A flicker of cool brushed his skin and he realised they must be walking through one of the groves. The coolness of the shadows under the trees suited his mood. It had been his choice to come back and take up his position properly, he was needed here, in service to Vkandis and to Solaris, it was a great honour for someone his age to be placed in a position of such importance, but right now it didn't feel it. Right now it felt like someone had dropped the world on his shoulders and he wanted to go back. I want my friends, I want Evey, I want--
The sudden shock as he tripped over a root and went sprawling in the long - and thankfully soft - grass made him gasp. A soft nose poked him inquiringly. "No, I'm fine," he assured her, rolling onto his back. A beam of sunlight fell across him as the trees shifted in the mild breeze and he lifted his face into it. I want... The fall had shaken his thoughts loose from their rut. Long moments passed as he considered them, and he winced. "I want to stop feeling sorry for myself," he finally said, "and I am done with it. I am where I chose to be, where I must be." There was a snort of approval from Idry and the warmth from the sunshine washed through him, leaving calm certainty in its wake. Sunlord, thank you. From here on, it is time to go forward.
[ooc: NFI, NFB, OOC AOK.]
Altra had gone to Sunhame to deliver a stack of urgent missives to Solaris, things that needed her direct approval rather than that of the Envoy, and Talia had urged him to take the morning for himself. She'd even brought him a guide, the young Heraldic trainee on whose arm Karal's hand rested. Tripping over my own feet as I tried to find my way might not do much for the dignity of Karse, he thought wryly. "I think we're almost there?"
There was a start of surprise from beside him, followed by a, "Yes, sir!", and Karal hid a smile. She was very young. Or maybe it was just that he felt old. A few more steps, and he stretched out his other hand, fingers brushing against the smooth wood of the fence. "You can leave me here, Trenia. I can manage on my own."
"Are you sure, sir?" Her voice was worried, and he could picture her earnest expression.
"If there's one place in Haven I'll be safe, it's Companion's Field, and," he smiled at her, "if I run into a few trees, I'm sure it won't do any harm." It took a few more moments of persuasion, but eventually she left. Karal listened to her footsteps retreat, shaking his head as they stopped rather than fading away. No doubt she'd keep an eye on him, and no doubt she'd ask her Companion to do the same, but he put them out of his mind.
It was easy to slip through the fence, and he paused on the other side to orient himself, then began to walk towards the centre of the field. The almost-silent hoofbeats that joined him after a few minutes weren't a surprise, nor was the warmth he could feel next to him, and he reached out to brush his fingers over one silky shoulder. "Idry?" A soft snort answered him. Florian's youngest sister had made something of a habit out of keeping an eye on him. When he'd been able to snatch some time to walk, he came to Companion's Field; the first time Altra hadn't been with him, she had appointed herself his guide. They didn't talk - as a rule, Companions spoke only with their Chosen - but Karal took comfort in her presence, and he thought she took some from his. While they both knew Florian had gone on to a new life, it didn't stop either of them from missing him.
With one hand on Idry's shoulder he didn't have to think about where he was walking, and the quiet, the warmth and the brush of their feet moving through the grass soon found him lost in thought. It had been weeks since he'd returned. Weeks of non-stop work as he caught up on everything he'd left undone. Seemingly endless meetings, in length and in number, and the half-awed way people stared at him had made him almost wistful for the days when no one had trusted him and half of them had thought he was a traitor. What he'd said to Evey was true: his blindness had turned him into a symbol, and given him the authority that he'd struggled so hard for in the days after Ulrich's death.
Evey. He missed her so much, missed her more than sight. It was as if he'd left part of himself behind when he'd left her; there was a hollowness inside that nothing quite seemed to fill. But it wasn't just her; he missed everyone. He missed Fandom. He missed being just another student. And there the blindness was barely remarked upon. He'd taken to wearing a scarf wrapped around his eyes after Talia had explained that his sightless eyes made some people uncomfortable. Meetings had grown easier after that.
Karal sighed again, not so quietly this time. He'd not even found the time to write, and he felt a twinge of guilt as he realised how long it had been since he left.
A flicker of cool brushed his skin and he realised they must be walking through one of the groves. The coolness of the shadows under the trees suited his mood. It had been his choice to come back and take up his position properly, he was needed here, in service to Vkandis and to Solaris, it was a great honour for someone his age to be placed in a position of such importance, but right now it didn't feel it. Right now it felt like someone had dropped the world on his shoulders and he wanted to go back. I want my friends, I want Evey, I want--
The sudden shock as he tripped over a root and went sprawling in the long - and thankfully soft - grass made him gasp. A soft nose poked him inquiringly. "No, I'm fine," he assured her, rolling onto his back. A beam of sunlight fell across him as the trees shifted in the mild breeze and he lifted his face into it. I want... The fall had shaken his thoughts loose from their rut. Long moments passed as he considered them, and he winced. "I want to stop feeling sorry for myself," he finally said, "and I am done with it. I am where I chose to be, where I must be." There was a snort of approval from Idry and the warmth from the sunshine washed through him, leaving calm certainty in its wake. Sunlord, thank you. From here on, it is time to go forward.
[ooc: NFI, NFB, OOC AOK.]