(no subject)
wow ... today is gonna suck... im at school... and all the 10th graders are gone. they went on some collage trip shit.. i dunno what it is.. and i didnt want to go.. and i thought i was gonna stay home.. but no... my mom had to be a dick.. and made me go... wtf???? so yeah.. now im stuck here with nothing to do.. im sooo pissed off right now.. its sad... i was sitting on the bus and some kid was sitting next to me.. and he smelt like ass and he kept hollering over me.. i was like 2.2 secs from knockin him out.. errr. then i check my voice mail on my phone.. and i hear something i REALLY didnt want to..
but i dont want to get into it really. so if u care to know.. then those of u who know my number.. or see me often.. ask.. and ill tell ya.. anyways. thursday i am more than likely going to casandra's when my mom gets back from work. (i dont have school friday) and then friday i am gonna somehow go to Bangor High and visit some people i havent seen in a long time. :-) i hope it works out.. cause i tried doing this before.. and i didnt get to.. again.. cause my moms a dick. but n e ways. im probably staying with casandra all vacation. shes like the only person i really hang out with. .. that and Josh. but i dont really get to see him that often. wow..
relationships suck. i hate when u fall in love or care about someone so much and you'd do n e thing for them with no questions asked.
it feels sooo good to have so much.. yet it sucks having so much to lose... is it even worth it to take the chance... lay ur heart out on the line.. they could take it.. and cherish it.. or they can throw it all away..... i hate not knowing.
(i see a fly on the wall.. its soo stupid.. it keeps flying INTO the wall.. instead of like... i dunno BESIDE it or something.. fucking idiot!)
for me i guess its all worth it though.. i hate being alone... then again.. im sure most people do.. i love having someone i know cares about me.. someone who compliments me... (even if sometimes its soooo not true) someone i know i can talk to.. someone who can show me affection.
but hey.. im gonna go.. im just a tid-bit depressed.
peace love empathy