"i miss the innocence i've known. playing kiss covers, beautiful and stoned."
i hate when u finally think that things are better and there's finally some happiness present but then turn around to find that it hasn't changed and its just gotten worse. and the reason that you know it has gotten worse is because you feel even shittier than you felt the last time it occured and the shitty feeling builds up and each time, it hurts more and more.
self-control is so hard. no more outgoing calls, receiving is okay.
i think i've lost my ability to see two sides of situations now. the blame always goes from the other person back to me when i try to see the two sides. sometimes i think that i'm just a miserable person. but other times, i feel like theres just too many different personalities and too many things going on. everyone has their ideal and i guess mine might be a little more but maybe its not.
the hardest part about making a decision is not looking at the good and the bad but trying to figure out what outweighs what.
on a lighter note, i visited Gallatin and College of Arts and science at nyu today. i think that i am going to apply to gallatin even though i don't think i'll get in and even if i did, i wouldn't be able to afford it. i really liked how the school is. i still can't decide what i want to major in so it would be a good place for me start. tcnj tommorrow.
self-control is so hard. no more outgoing calls, receiving is okay.
i think i've lost my ability to see two sides of situations now. the blame always goes from the other person back to me when i try to see the two sides. sometimes i think that i'm just a miserable person. but other times, i feel like theres just too many different personalities and too many things going on. everyone has their ideal and i guess mine might be a little more but maybe its not.
the hardest part about making a decision is not looking at the good and the bad but trying to figure out what outweighs what.
on a lighter note, i visited Gallatin and College of Arts and science at nyu today. i think that i am going to apply to gallatin even though i don't think i'll get in and even if i did, i wouldn't be able to afford it. i really liked how the school is. i still can't decide what i want to major in so it would be a good place for me start. tcnj tommorrow.