Might not die first in a post-apocalyptic world after all
So my friends and I decided to have a little barbecue lunch thing last Saturday. None of us had actually worked a charcoal barbecue by ourselves before; a few of us had some experience operating a propane barbecue. We figured we'd just throw in some charcoal, light the firestarters, and be in business in no time.
Two hours, 10 blocks of individually wrapped firestarters (rather than the recommended 2-3), a few burnt napkins and sheets of newsprint, and a phonecall to my dad (who laughed at us) later, the charcoal finally, FINALLY caught on.
APPARENTLY COMBUSTION (BOTH COMPLETE AND INCOMPLETE) REQUIRES A CONSTANT SUPPLY OF OXYGEN (grade ten science was mumblemumble years ago, how could we remember?) NO COMBUSTION IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN OUR MISGUIDED ATTEMPT TO LET THE BARBECUE HEAT UP -- BY SHUTTING BOTH OF THE TEENY TINY VENTS AND THE CHARCOAL TRAY HATCH AFTER SEEING THE FIRESTARTERS BLAZING MERRILY -- INSTEAD CUTS OFF ALL POSSIBLE OXYGEN SOURCES. IT WAS VERY FAIL AND VERY SAD. WE WERE CONVINCED THAT WE WOULD BE THE FIRST TO DIE IF OUR SURVIVAL REQUIRED US TO KNOW HOW TO START A CHARCOAL BARBECUE.
Whatever, we finally achieved mostly smokeless combustion by using a few more firestarters, leaving the hatch open and fanning the space beneath the charcoal tray a lot, and then we got to eat delicious charcoal barbecued hamburgers and hotdogs and chicken while sitting under bright blue skies and the faintest of breezes. It was great.
I THINK WE DESERVE A PLAQUE OR SOMETHING. THE "MOSTLY CLUELESS BARBECUE NEWBS SUCCESSFULLY BARBECUED WITHOUT ANY INJURIES" AWARD, MAYBE.
Two hours, 10 blocks of individually wrapped firestarters (rather than the recommended 2-3), a few burnt napkins and sheets of newsprint, and a phonecall to my dad (who laughed at us) later, the charcoal finally, FINALLY caught on.
APPARENTLY COMBUSTION (BOTH COMPLETE AND INCOMPLETE) REQUIRES A CONSTANT SUPPLY OF OXYGEN (grade ten science was mumblemumble years ago, how could we remember?) NO COMBUSTION IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN OUR MISGUIDED ATTEMPT TO LET THE BARBECUE HEAT UP -- BY SHUTTING BOTH OF THE TEENY TINY VENTS AND THE CHARCOAL TRAY HATCH AFTER SEEING THE FIRESTARTERS BLAZING MERRILY -- INSTEAD CUTS OFF ALL POSSIBLE OXYGEN SOURCES. IT WAS VERY FAIL AND VERY SAD. WE WERE CONVINCED THAT WE WOULD BE THE FIRST TO DIE IF OUR SURVIVAL REQUIRED US TO KNOW HOW TO START A CHARCOAL BARBECUE.
Whatever, we finally achieved mostly smokeless combustion by using a few more firestarters, leaving the hatch open and fanning the space beneath the charcoal tray a lot, and then we got to eat delicious charcoal barbecued hamburgers and hotdogs and chicken while sitting under bright blue skies and the faintest of breezes. It was great.
I THINK WE DESERVE A PLAQUE OR SOMETHING. THE "MOSTLY CLUELESS BARBECUE NEWBS SUCCESSFULLY BARBECUED WITHOUT ANY INJURIES" AWARD, MAYBE.