prayer and fasting
began a juice fast today
come home to dan's brother's home made chicken noodle soup and had just smoked my first bowl in months(to push away the hunger pains). Emotions will run easily out of my eyes and embaressment is not so easy to hide.
my house in not a home.
my house is not a home.
my house is not a home.
want to be able to run a bath without having to scrub the bathtub first.
it's a bachelor pad, and i am a woman who wants her role as a woman given back to her, but not taken advantage of. what is this i am saying. i dont want to have to clean up after three grown men who are unsettled and unmanicured.
i am not so much myself...but so much disdain and intolerence in me lately.
that is what my fast is for.
tolerence for the situations and persons that arise around me.
dan and i have bags to hang around our necks in which we will address what our fast is for as well as mark it with meaning of substance.
do i return to lincoln for halloween?
do i return for joanna newsom, a week later?
or do i just wait for dan's show that he's booked for two weeks later?
joanna newsom plays on dan's birthday. dan would never go to that show for his birthday. never. and i being the sappy girlfriend, feel i should be with him to celebrate that day. i shouldn't leave him in colorado, for music, although, he just may be the only boyfriend i might ever have that would understand such a thing. he being so musically driven and inclined.
i am emotions and unsteady.
i dont want your energy near me, OH I do.
please come back.
come home to dan's brother's home made chicken noodle soup and had just smoked my first bowl in months(to push away the hunger pains). Emotions will run easily out of my eyes and embaressment is not so easy to hide.
my house in not a home.
my house is not a home.
my house is not a home.
want to be able to run a bath without having to scrub the bathtub first.
it's a bachelor pad, and i am a woman who wants her role as a woman given back to her, but not taken advantage of. what is this i am saying. i dont want to have to clean up after three grown men who are unsettled and unmanicured.
i am not so much myself...but so much disdain and intolerence in me lately.
that is what my fast is for.
tolerence for the situations and persons that arise around me.
dan and i have bags to hang around our necks in which we will address what our fast is for as well as mark it with meaning of substance.
do i return to lincoln for halloween?
do i return for joanna newsom, a week later?
or do i just wait for dan's show that he's booked for two weeks later?
joanna newsom plays on dan's birthday. dan would never go to that show for his birthday. never. and i being the sappy girlfriend, feel i should be with him to celebrate that day. i shouldn't leave him in colorado, for music, although, he just may be the only boyfriend i might ever have that would understand such a thing. he being so musically driven and inclined.
i am emotions and unsteady.
i dont want your energy near me, OH I do.
please come back.