On genetics, and the adherents thereof
We drove down to Austin yesterday. Central Texas, blighted and benighted as it is, is not without its beauty. For example, we passed three deer on the side of the road, a reminder that in many parts of the country, hunting season has begun. Which I'm against, except for the fantastic venison jerky my father-in-law makes.
We passed a beat up old Dodge Valiant station wagon on the way into town, and I said "Was that..." and R said "It was!" We had just had, apparently, a close encounter with The Sexiest Man Alive. Well, I was so aflutter that I missed our turn onto Ben White Blvd., and had to slog through a bunch of construction.
Which got me to thinking about a conversation we'd recently had with someone who knew something about sperm donation. No, really. It turns out that, not only are there several (high and low end) sperm banks, but (naturally) some donors (although anonymous) are more in demand than others. You get all sorts of background information (health, education), and an essay (let me repeat, an essay), and photographs of the donor as a child (no recognizable adult photos). Whatever you think about genetics, its clear that people put great stock in the idea that if your sperm donor has a Ph.D. (or plays the piano, or, get this, travels a lot) that your son or daughter will also have a propensity for getting a Ph.D., playing the piano, or perhaps, traveling... away from the people who gave them birth. In any case, there's this guy walking around that has folks *on a waiting list* for his sperm. Nowadays, most sperm donations are anonymous, so there won't be any paternity issues, I guess. And there won't be any potentially embarrassing scenes at the grocery store. But how anonymous can this guy possibly be? Just look for the guy with the biggest strut you've ever seen. "I've got the goods and have a waiting list to prove it." A waiting list!
I know what you're thinking, and I was thinking the same thing, too. Evidently they *ration* this guy's sperm, so you don't get every kid in the neighborhood looking strangely alike. Nevertheless, someone (you know who you are) should write a story in which these half-siblings, years later, experience a strange attraction to each other. You can fill in the details for yourself.
Did I mention there was a waiting list?
Back to the Sexiest Man Alive. Do you think there's a market for celebrity sperm? R says no, who would want to expose themselves to all those paternity suits? I'm not so sure... what better way to revive a flagging career, or raise money for charity than a little gamete auction? Well, we passed the Dodge Valiant again, glimpsed in, and decided that, alas, it wasn't the Sexiest Man Alive, after all, but a dead ringer. Which brings me finally to my point today, do you think there's a market for celebrity look-alike sperm?
We passed a beat up old Dodge Valiant station wagon on the way into town, and I said "Was that..." and R said "It was!" We had just had, apparently, a close encounter with The Sexiest Man Alive. Well, I was so aflutter that I missed our turn onto Ben White Blvd., and had to slog through a bunch of construction.
Which got me to thinking about a conversation we'd recently had with someone who knew something about sperm donation. No, really. It turns out that, not only are there several (high and low end) sperm banks, but (naturally) some donors (although anonymous) are more in demand than others. You get all sorts of background information (health, education), and an essay (let me repeat, an essay), and photographs of the donor as a child (no recognizable adult photos). Whatever you think about genetics, its clear that people put great stock in the idea that if your sperm donor has a Ph.D. (or plays the piano, or, get this, travels a lot) that your son or daughter will also have a propensity for getting a Ph.D., playing the piano, or perhaps, traveling... away from the people who gave them birth. In any case, there's this guy walking around that has folks *on a waiting list* for his sperm. Nowadays, most sperm donations are anonymous, so there won't be any paternity issues, I guess. And there won't be any potentially embarrassing scenes at the grocery store. But how anonymous can this guy possibly be? Just look for the guy with the biggest strut you've ever seen. "I've got the goods and have a waiting list to prove it." A waiting list!
I know what you're thinking, and I was thinking the same thing, too. Evidently they *ration* this guy's sperm, so you don't get every kid in the neighborhood looking strangely alike. Nevertheless, someone (you know who you are) should write a story in which these half-siblings, years later, experience a strange attraction to each other. You can fill in the details for yourself.
Did I mention there was a waiting list?
Back to the Sexiest Man Alive. Do you think there's a market for celebrity sperm? R says no, who would want to expose themselves to all those paternity suits? I'm not so sure... what better way to revive a flagging career, or raise money for charity than a little gamete auction? Well, we passed the Dodge Valiant again, glimpsed in, and decided that, alas, it wasn't the Sexiest Man Alive, after all, but a dead ringer. Which brings me finally to my point today, do you think there's a market for celebrity look-alike sperm?