This probably isn't too coherent, but...
I want to capture feelings in bottles.
Being up in the mountains, surrounded by miles of untouched nature, sitting on rocks at the coastline, watching the waves draw back and rush forward, waking up to rain tumbling through tree branches, walking into a museum full of history, reading a wonderful book ... I don't get to do these things every day, but I wish I could capture how they make me feel and take them with me whenever I need them the most.
Anxiety, (at least in my experience), often includes a jumbled, erratic array of negative emotions. I was raised by a parent who never saw the positive, only the negative, so seeking out optimism or the brighter side of things has always been a struggle anyway. But there are moments, feelings, that stand out to me because I know I'm happy. Inspired. Empowered. They aren't usually long lasting, but for those few moments the anxiety is clear and I feel like I can do anything. That's when I know I'm meant for more than mental illness. And usually, these moments are because of the above experiences.
I feel like this right now. I'm pumped and wanting to write and write and write and never stop. Maybe it's because it's rainy and cloudy outside, or maybe it's just a rare clearing in my head, but if only I could bottle this feeling, then maybe I could win this war with my head, and achieve all the things I so desperately want to achieve.
We can't put feelings in bottles, unfortunately. But maybe solidifying them in words will be just enough?
Being up in the mountains, surrounded by miles of untouched nature, sitting on rocks at the coastline, watching the waves draw back and rush forward, waking up to rain tumbling through tree branches, walking into a museum full of history, reading a wonderful book ... I don't get to do these things every day, but I wish I could capture how they make me feel and take them with me whenever I need them the most.
Anxiety, (at least in my experience), often includes a jumbled, erratic array of negative emotions. I was raised by a parent who never saw the positive, only the negative, so seeking out optimism or the brighter side of things has always been a struggle anyway. But there are moments, feelings, that stand out to me because I know I'm happy. Inspired. Empowered. They aren't usually long lasting, but for those few moments the anxiety is clear and I feel like I can do anything. That's when I know I'm meant for more than mental illness. And usually, these moments are because of the above experiences.
I feel like this right now. I'm pumped and wanting to write and write and write and never stop. Maybe it's because it's rainy and cloudy outside, or maybe it's just a rare clearing in my head, but if only I could bottle this feeling, then maybe I could win this war with my head, and achieve all the things I so desperately want to achieve.
We can't put feelings in bottles, unfortunately. But maybe solidifying them in words will be just enough?