attraction-repulsion and flippancy.
last night i dreamt that i was in bed with a guy from my french class. andy, the really metal one. he's the most metal kid i've met in a long time. excluding that this boy two summers ago (what was his name?) but that boy only looked metal and was a big sweetheart and liked horror novels. andy is not really a sweetheart. in fact, he is the only boy i know who has gotten a black eye in a fight who is over the age of 21 (ok so chris novak did that one time when he got in a fight with some frat boys. or was that a bruised neck. anyways). andy has very long hair. he wears a jean vest with cut out patches for hilariously named bands like *royal blood threat five thousand* and *pig monger extraordinaire* (i made those up so don't go googling them). he also wears the skinniest pegged jeans i've ever seen on an actual small person. meaning, i usually see pegged jeans on overweight rockabilly girls with ponytails and bad skin. he is smart, but smart in the way that he needs constant reassurance; he asks questions that he knows the answers to in order to affirm his knowledge. these are all important things to know. because once you know these things, you'll know that i have zero interest in ever sleeping with him. i would hang out with him only to be amused in an awkward sort of way, because he could definitely out-metal me.
in the dream, we were cuddling, ass naked, in a very white, bright room with a very big, white bed. i kept asking him, in french, if i could french braid his hair. which i thought was hilarious at the time. i don't even know how to say "please let me french braid your hair" in french. nor had i previously tried to visualize him naked. we were happy, but he was strangely lacking in any other type of body hair.
it's a good thing last night was our final exam, because i could not face seeing him tonight. i would probably make a complete ass out of myself by dying laughing. like the time i was late to class and exclaimed to this kid patrick "WHOA IS THAT A DAVID BOWIE BELT?". in fact, every boy in my class is awkward. i like the thirty year old women. one of them told me that she saw something that reminded her of me in this really expensive store in carytown, pink. it sounded like something i would wear if i wasn't afraid of showing off my chub.
bethany and i were talking and she said, "dan (her boyfriend, they just bought a house together near me hurrah) has lots of good boy friends. umm do you like skinny guys?" and at the time i was like "oh hell yes, set me up". now, after thinking about it, i do not think i want to handle the awkwardness of a first date. maybe i should turn metal. i mean, i've already seen him naked...
in the dream, we were cuddling, ass naked, in a very white, bright room with a very big, white bed. i kept asking him, in french, if i could french braid his hair. which i thought was hilarious at the time. i don't even know how to say "please let me french braid your hair" in french. nor had i previously tried to visualize him naked. we were happy, but he was strangely lacking in any other type of body hair.
it's a good thing last night was our final exam, because i could not face seeing him tonight. i would probably make a complete ass out of myself by dying laughing. like the time i was late to class and exclaimed to this kid patrick "WHOA IS THAT A DAVID BOWIE BELT?". in fact, every boy in my class is awkward. i like the thirty year old women. one of them told me that she saw something that reminded her of me in this really expensive store in carytown, pink. it sounded like something i would wear if i wasn't afraid of showing off my chub.
bethany and i were talking and she said, "dan (her boyfriend, they just bought a house together near me hurrah) has lots of good boy friends. umm do you like skinny guys?" and at the time i was like "oh hell yes, set me up". now, after thinking about it, i do not think i want to handle the awkwardness of a first date. maybe i should turn metal. i mean, i've already seen him naked...