Sorry i'm so whiny.
My throat feels like sandpaper. and it makes a weird sound when i swallow.
the visual artist's senior show is tonight. i was planning on going and then spending the night at jennys... or mary's. i'm still going to the show, but right now i just feel too goddamn tired and snot-stuffed to do anything afterwards.
i'm coming to terms with the fact that i'm going to fail the AP bio test and get the worst grades i've ever gotten in all of highschool at the end of the semester. i went and toured CU last weekend and even though it still makes me feel sick on the inside to imagine going there, i know i'll meet people and like it once it happens. been around a number of beautiful people who are obsessing about the way they look. it's super dumb but i can't kick the "if they don't even like their own selves i must be UGLY" feeling. my super chapped upper lip from nose blowing is not helping in this respect.
i'm a little angry at colorado for being cold and rainy/snowy every weekend. what the fuck home-state, i make PLANS on those days. plans that are meant to make me feel better and less anxious about my future n' shit.
i hope i'm healthy by the AP calc test next wednesday and i hope ed doesn't schedule me for any of the 5 days i needed off next week. because then i'm going to have to go and call people and internalize all my frustration with Ed and end up despising him even more.
so i can't wait for it to be sunny. and i can't wait but sort of want to wait for it to be summer and me to be graduated. and, as of right now, all i want to do all day errrrday is read jezebel and eat popcorn.
the visual artist's senior show is tonight. i was planning on going and then spending the night at jennys... or mary's. i'm still going to the show, but right now i just feel too goddamn tired and snot-stuffed to do anything afterwards.
i'm coming to terms with the fact that i'm going to fail the AP bio test and get the worst grades i've ever gotten in all of highschool at the end of the semester. i went and toured CU last weekend and even though it still makes me feel sick on the inside to imagine going there, i know i'll meet people and like it once it happens. been around a number of beautiful people who are obsessing about the way they look. it's super dumb but i can't kick the "if they don't even like their own selves i must be UGLY" feeling. my super chapped upper lip from nose blowing is not helping in this respect.
i'm a little angry at colorado for being cold and rainy/snowy every weekend. what the fuck home-state, i make PLANS on those days. plans that are meant to make me feel better and less anxious about my future n' shit.
i hope i'm healthy by the AP calc test next wednesday and i hope ed doesn't schedule me for any of the 5 days i needed off next week. because then i'm going to have to go and call people and internalize all my frustration with Ed and end up despising him even more.
so i can't wait for it to be sunny. and i can't wait but sort of want to wait for it to be summer and me to be graduated. and, as of right now, all i want to do all day errrrday is read jezebel and eat popcorn.