well arent you just a fucking ray of sunshine...
as much as i love the rain, it is a gorgeous day today.. the sun is shining, but it is a little bit chilly out.. which is perfect for me.. i notice so much beauty on days like today.. and i am just in a really good mood in general.. got up early and actually felt refreshed.. picked my sister up and drove her to school.. then i went to work, where i am alone today.. its so relaxing when nobody is here.. and besides the few random phonecalls, it has been a very quiet and lazy day.. and speaking of beauty, my baby is coming home from school today.. and i am so exicted to see her.. every time i see her its like the very first time again.. it reminds of the night that we went aimlessly driving around.. when we finally got tired, i dropped her off at her house.. and she says "you know, we've never hugged".. so we hugged and it was a kinda awkward hug.. and i said something like "im sorry, that was a bad hug, and im sorry if its not what you'd hoped for" and she said "its ok.. we'll have plenty of times to make up for it." and i was like.. so nervous and giddy and just couldnt believe how much i felt for her in the short time that we'd been seeing eachother.. we had known eachother for years.. but we had never really talked before the show out at the haunt (May 29th, 2004) when she rode out to the show with me and we got completely lost for 45 minutes and had the most wonderful time.. so after we hugged she got out of the car and went inside.. i drove away and as i did so.. i said to myself in my head "you fucking bastard, why dont you just tell her how you feel?" and i replied "because you moron, she could never possibly feel the same way that i do!" and then i exlaimed "just do it you little pussy bitch, or you'll never know.. do you want to miss possibly the only chance that you have at something wonderful? remember how long she was with her ex-boyfriend? three years!! do you want to wait that long to get another chance?" to which i said "no." so all this went through my head before i reached the first stop sign.. so i pull into a driveway.. and i call her cell phone... and im like "uhhh.. you left something in my car.." and shes like "what is it".. and i was like "umm.. uhh.. i dunno.. i gotta go.. bye.. i'll see you in a second. bye." so i pulled back into her driveway.. and she was like "so what did i forget?" and i said "nothing." and she just looked at me.. then i took a deep breath and said "meagan, i really like you, and you can do with that what you will.. but i needed to get it off my chest and i thought you should know." and she leaned forward.. and she kissed me.. and i said "you did that...." and she said that she really liked me too.. and then we kissed again.. and then she went inside and i went home and jerked off like a fiend.. it was awesome.. well.. not the jerking off.. but the day.. well.. the masturbation was awesome too.. hah.. i fucking love that girl.. she makes me feel like a kid.. and i just wouldnt be right without her.... its a good day.. and its only gonna get better once she's home..