Fic: An Ordinary Rendition
This is what I do with my time when trying to avoid...useful things. Like I need to tell you all this.
Title: An Ordinary Rendition
Characters: Hesam (Peter's paramedic buddy, according to IMDB and HeroesWiki); mentions of Peter; others implied
Rating: PG13 just for language (a couple of F-bombs; I admittedly did not count)
Warnings: Some potentially slashy/incesty subtext, if you choose to see it.
Spoilers: For "A Clear and Present Danger"
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with Heroes.
Summary: Reflections on having Peter Petrelli as a partner, and all that entails.
A/N: This is the most recent off-shoot of my long standing "Tales of the Heroes Adjacent" series idea, i.e., the reactions of average one-episode characters to all the crazy shit going down around them, and the only one I've actually written.
Look, when I first got him as a partner, I kind of hated the guy. For one, I was sure he was going to bail on me in the first week, you know? He seemed a little…sensitive.
And yeah, I’ll be the first to admit it, I gave him a hard time over it at first.
But seriously, if you knew him? You kind of have to hate him. That whole handsome-but-I-don’t-know-it, comes from-money-but-utterly-selfless thing, dude had to be just about the best actor ever. All that poor little rich white boy crap, so fucking troubled by…by whatever hell they gave him in his prep school and that his parents might’ve disapproved of him not going into the family business and how noble he was for slumming it…I’ve seen it before, okay?
I’ve been doing this job for a while, and if you’re here it’s usually one of two things: you’re too poor to go to med school and too much of a dick to want to be a nurse, or you’re out to prove yourself the biggest martyr since the Big Guy, usually because your family sucked, and Peter’s a textbook case of number two.
In fact Peter might as well be Patient Zero of number two, because no one’s that much of a saint, right? And when you’re his partner, wow, it’s like a constant judgment there, because Peter’s willing to work the crap shifts and Peter’s willing to run into unsecured buildings to get to GSW’s who’ll probably kill him even if the dudes who shot them don’t, and you’re his partner, right, so you’ve got to be right next to him for all of that, because that’s the rule.
And you know, maybe he is the best actor ever, but after a while you sort of buy it. Okay, so maybe he lets it slip he used to be a hospice nurse, and that’s rough, dude. That’s like…like we laugh at TV shows, right, and how every time there’s as call on TV that patients always seem to live; you know, paramedics rushing patients into hospital wings so doctors can get around to killing them instead.
It’s all bullshit, though, because we see more people die than probably anyone, definitely more than anyone who’s job it isn’t to explicitly kill people.
But it’s those one in ten we save, those are the ones we go on for. But Peter, wow, what did he have to go on for? You know, I talked to him about it once and he was like, the point was to ensure a “good” death, or whatever, which is frankly bull because I’ve seen enough of them to know there’s no such thing, but then again, so has he.
See, that’s the thing with Peter: even though you and I know its bull, whatever he’s saying, you believe that he believes it. And hey, man, whatever helps him sleep at night, huh?
So he’s a good guy. Fucking crazy about some things, way too sensitive about everything, but a good guy. And that’s seriously the worst thing I can say about him: he’s too sensitive, takes everything personally. Dead patients, angry patients, stupid patients, racist patients, and apparently that’s for my sake which I have to find hilarious, especially given his brother.
If I’m being honest, though, I guess I appreciate the sentiment, mostly because you can’t really hate someone who’s taken a punch for you more than once, just because he’s not smart enough to duck.
So yeah, Peter Petrelli, all around good guy, savior complex, acts like he’s personally responsible for every DB we get called out for, like people die because he’s just not trying hard enough.
And I get that, man, we all get like that sometimes. And it’s right about then that most of us self-medicate. Not in a stupid way, right, it’s usually just the classics, cheap beer and anonymous sex because really, anything else’s a liability.
But you guys get that, right? Anyone who understands is too busy to care and everyone else doesn’t get it, and connecting with people’s just a bit of a waste of time, on both sides, so you take what you can get.
Peter doesn’t. Just…doesn’t. Doesn’t unwind, doesn’t want to get close to anyone, which is really fucking weird, after you’ve seen him with patients.
Dude’ll hold the hands of gangbangers and keep tabs on people that I know, that he knows, aren’t going to know him from Adam in a couple of days or want to remember how it is they met, but invite him out for a beer after work and it’s like…he just completely shuts down.
Real nice about it, too, but man, it’s weird. Doesn’t really talk much about himself either, always the one word answers about anything personal, simple stuff like what he did over the weekend, you don’t get much.
And look, I’m not a big social guy either, right, but I felt bad for him. All of us need someone, you know? And I’d rather my partner not go chicken-killer on me in the line of duty. So I went over there a couple of times, a six-pack, some chips, and me, you know, instant party. Finally got him to loosen up a bit.
But you should see his place. Huge, like I don’t know how he’s affording it, huge, and it’s not like you can ask that. Pictures of him and his brother all over the place, and I guess his mom, weird…stuff, like this bobbly-head dog thing he freaked out about me touching, and some books and posters and crap, but nothing…nothing else.
Like he didn’t have any friends, and I’m pretty sure he’s not doing too well with his family, especially his brother. So what’s his deal, I’m thinking. We’re a little more comfortable with each other, and I ask him, right, when’s the last time…you know, how long it’s been, and he just kind of brushes it off.
Which, you know, it’s personal, and I get that, but the way he evades it’s not like…not like he doesn’t want to talk about it, but like he can’t. And it’s weird, okay?
But you guys know how it is, right? Sometimes you just have that…feeling, that something’s off. And I felt it. Feel it right now, that’s why I’m-
Last time I saw him? Two days ago, end of a shift. We got called out to…I don’t even remember, a car accident, Upper East Side, I think. Peter would remember, but I…well, we lost the guy. He bled out before we even got to him. Peter was pretty upset about it, a little more than usual. I tried to talk him down. Brought up his brother, which just got him…tenser.
I said some stuff, he said some stuff, I didn’t think he was really mad but he got a phone call and that’s the last I saw him. One of your guys at the scene, didn’t get his name, told me he saw him get into a cab but-
How do I…? Well, he didn’t show up for work yesterday. He’s never done that but hey, it happens, give the kid a break, so I called and left a message.
He didn’t call me back, so I went over, after my shift, and he didn’t answer the door. Called his cell a couple of times from outside and I’m pretty sure I heard it ringing, but no one I’ve talked to has seen him, not since before yesterday.
Look, it’s been more than twenty-four hours, okay? And the guy’s got a history, depression, suicide attempts, stuff like that, so I…I figured someone should know.
His family? I guess you could give them a try but…well, he told me he hasn’t talked to him in two months, I don’t think…sure, but-
No, I know it’s your job but…just let me know if you find anything out, okay?
No, thank you.
Dick.
*
Title: An Ordinary Rendition
Characters: Hesam (Peter's paramedic buddy, according to IMDB and HeroesWiki); mentions of Peter; others implied
Rating: PG13 just for language (a couple of F-bombs; I admittedly did not count)
Warnings: Some potentially slashy/incesty subtext, if you choose to see it.
Spoilers: For "A Clear and Present Danger"
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with Heroes.
Summary: Reflections on having Peter Petrelli as a partner, and all that entails.
A/N: This is the most recent off-shoot of my long standing "Tales of the Heroes Adjacent" series idea, i.e., the reactions of average one-episode characters to all the crazy shit going down around them, and the only one I've actually written.
Look, when I first got him as a partner, I kind of hated the guy. For one, I was sure he was going to bail on me in the first week, you know? He seemed a little…sensitive.
And yeah, I’ll be the first to admit it, I gave him a hard time over it at first.
But seriously, if you knew him? You kind of have to hate him. That whole handsome-but-I-don’t-know-it, comes from-money-but-utterly-selfless thing, dude had to be just about the best actor ever. All that poor little rich white boy crap, so fucking troubled by…by whatever hell they gave him in his prep school and that his parents might’ve disapproved of him not going into the family business and how noble he was for slumming it…I’ve seen it before, okay?
I’ve been doing this job for a while, and if you’re here it’s usually one of two things: you’re too poor to go to med school and too much of a dick to want to be a nurse, or you’re out to prove yourself the biggest martyr since the Big Guy, usually because your family sucked, and Peter’s a textbook case of number two.
In fact Peter might as well be Patient Zero of number two, because no one’s that much of a saint, right? And when you’re his partner, wow, it’s like a constant judgment there, because Peter’s willing to work the crap shifts and Peter’s willing to run into unsecured buildings to get to GSW’s who’ll probably kill him even if the dudes who shot them don’t, and you’re his partner, right, so you’ve got to be right next to him for all of that, because that’s the rule.
And you know, maybe he is the best actor ever, but after a while you sort of buy it. Okay, so maybe he lets it slip he used to be a hospice nurse, and that’s rough, dude. That’s like…like we laugh at TV shows, right, and how every time there’s as call on TV that patients always seem to live; you know, paramedics rushing patients into hospital wings so doctors can get around to killing them instead.
It’s all bullshit, though, because we see more people die than probably anyone, definitely more than anyone who’s job it isn’t to explicitly kill people.
But it’s those one in ten we save, those are the ones we go on for. But Peter, wow, what did he have to go on for? You know, I talked to him about it once and he was like, the point was to ensure a “good” death, or whatever, which is frankly bull because I’ve seen enough of them to know there’s no such thing, but then again, so has he.
See, that’s the thing with Peter: even though you and I know its bull, whatever he’s saying, you believe that he believes it. And hey, man, whatever helps him sleep at night, huh?
So he’s a good guy. Fucking crazy about some things, way too sensitive about everything, but a good guy. And that’s seriously the worst thing I can say about him: he’s too sensitive, takes everything personally. Dead patients, angry patients, stupid patients, racist patients, and apparently that’s for my sake which I have to find hilarious, especially given his brother.
If I’m being honest, though, I guess I appreciate the sentiment, mostly because you can’t really hate someone who’s taken a punch for you more than once, just because he’s not smart enough to duck.
So yeah, Peter Petrelli, all around good guy, savior complex, acts like he’s personally responsible for every DB we get called out for, like people die because he’s just not trying hard enough.
And I get that, man, we all get like that sometimes. And it’s right about then that most of us self-medicate. Not in a stupid way, right, it’s usually just the classics, cheap beer and anonymous sex because really, anything else’s a liability.
But you guys get that, right? Anyone who understands is too busy to care and everyone else doesn’t get it, and connecting with people’s just a bit of a waste of time, on both sides, so you take what you can get.
Peter doesn’t. Just…doesn’t. Doesn’t unwind, doesn’t want to get close to anyone, which is really fucking weird, after you’ve seen him with patients.
Dude’ll hold the hands of gangbangers and keep tabs on people that I know, that he knows, aren’t going to know him from Adam in a couple of days or want to remember how it is they met, but invite him out for a beer after work and it’s like…he just completely shuts down.
Real nice about it, too, but man, it’s weird. Doesn’t really talk much about himself either, always the one word answers about anything personal, simple stuff like what he did over the weekend, you don’t get much.
And look, I’m not a big social guy either, right, but I felt bad for him. All of us need someone, you know? And I’d rather my partner not go chicken-killer on me in the line of duty. So I went over there a couple of times, a six-pack, some chips, and me, you know, instant party. Finally got him to loosen up a bit.
But you should see his place. Huge, like I don’t know how he’s affording it, huge, and it’s not like you can ask that. Pictures of him and his brother all over the place, and I guess his mom, weird…stuff, like this bobbly-head dog thing he freaked out about me touching, and some books and posters and crap, but nothing…nothing else.
Like he didn’t have any friends, and I’m pretty sure he’s not doing too well with his family, especially his brother. So what’s his deal, I’m thinking. We’re a little more comfortable with each other, and I ask him, right, when’s the last time…you know, how long it’s been, and he just kind of brushes it off.
Which, you know, it’s personal, and I get that, but the way he evades it’s not like…not like he doesn’t want to talk about it, but like he can’t. And it’s weird, okay?
But you guys know how it is, right? Sometimes you just have that…feeling, that something’s off. And I felt it. Feel it right now, that’s why I’m-
Last time I saw him? Two days ago, end of a shift. We got called out to…I don’t even remember, a car accident, Upper East Side, I think. Peter would remember, but I…well, we lost the guy. He bled out before we even got to him. Peter was pretty upset about it, a little more than usual. I tried to talk him down. Brought up his brother, which just got him…tenser.
I said some stuff, he said some stuff, I didn’t think he was really mad but he got a phone call and that’s the last I saw him. One of your guys at the scene, didn’t get his name, told me he saw him get into a cab but-
How do I…? Well, he didn’t show up for work yesterday. He’s never done that but hey, it happens, give the kid a break, so I called and left a message.
He didn’t call me back, so I went over, after my shift, and he didn’t answer the door. Called his cell a couple of times from outside and I’m pretty sure I heard it ringing, but no one I’ve talked to has seen him, not since before yesterday.
Look, it’s been more than twenty-four hours, okay? And the guy’s got a history, depression, suicide attempts, stuff like that, so I…I figured someone should know.
His family? I guess you could give them a try but…well, he told me he hasn’t talked to him in two months, I don’t think…sure, but-
No, I know it’s your job but…just let me know if you find anything out, okay?
No, thank you.
Dick.
*