This is no a cry for help.
You know, there's times when for no reason, you feel nothing. I'd rather be dead than feel nothing. I'd rather jump from a building with a rope tied around my neck, doubble tie, just to make sure. I have no rrason for feeling this way. I just do. What brings me to shut people out? I sit in my living room all day, rotate between the computer and the tv. I feel restless, like I don't fit. I feel anxious, like I need to get out, and I feel nothing. So I shut off the tv, sit up and look at the ground and cry. Cry cry cry. All I really want to do is cry. I canm't pick up the phone and call someone, I can't call Kristen, or Kim. Even though at times I want to. I want to hear their voice, talk about something and laugh. I can't call them because I don't know what I would say to them, What I would say to my in-laws about why I havent gone to see them or even called, i don't know what I would say to my friends about why I feel like this. I don't even know what to say to Jason. I just got married, I have everything I want and need.Why this depression? why now, and why me? I don't understand. Sometimes I wish I would just die... but I have way too much to live for.