Dying inside, feeling the freeze

[virus_v9_09]

It would seem Amanda has made it cold and clear. I don't know what hurts more, loving someone that never loved me or the word " stupidity" added to leaving someone that left them hanging and hurt and "supposedly" loving the one that "supposedly" made them feel loved and good. i guess i was a stupid mistake, and it only makes me wonder if my son is

Comments

Nice. what are you trying to hide.. really? I didnt block ur coments

[hitoriphoenix]

All women are not the spawn of saiten and neather am I. No,Xander is not a mistake. I have never said he was. You on the other hand have repeatedly said that i thought he was. What is it Nakia? Is he really a mistake to you and you just dont want ot admit it? I mean after all if he wasnt wouldnt you want to spend more time with him instead of just 2 days worth of time, and not even that really, with him in November?
As for loving you, i did at one point. Before the lies, before your little harem, before I found out that you had problems with the law that I should have never been drug into as well as your unwillingness to face your father let alone tell him that you were married and he had a grandson. You hid us away. If anyone should be furiouse it should be me. I dont know how many times you said you were broke and short on a bill and i had to cover it but the next day you walked down to the gastation and bought candy and sodapop, lottry tickets, ciggerettes. You dont quite have yoru priorities in check. Did I ever get over Dave? I thought I had at one point. You use to ask me if I still loved him and I gave you the same answer every time. Im not saying that eveything in this split is your fault. It takes 2 to tango. You really need to start looking att he whole thing and not just how much you hurt. Your not the only one. How do you think I felt when i saw you feel Jamie up oin the MSN and then you said " I wasnt doing anything" I made you face up to it and she got pissed cuz you told her "just kidding" and btw she denies it was even her that it was her roomate and you never asked her to call you and never talked to her on a voice chat and her telling you that she didnt have a phone card. etc. Just thought youd like to know. BUT anyway, stop trying to drag Xander into it. he is NOT a mistake,YOU were nto a mistake, we just didnt work out. If you decide to stay alone then so be it. What I do know is the more that you carry on like this, you are becoming a pathetic person. Yes it is mean but it is. Wake up, grow up, get your GED ATLEAST and get on with your life.