it's too fucking confusing.
i haven't kissed him in like 2 days. i really want to. but. today, at first i just wanted to hug him//hold his hand//kiss him//hold him. but some bullshit happened. &i feel like i hate him. but i know i don't. i could never hate him, no matter what goes down, i'll always forgive him if he does something wrong. i just wish he knew how i feel. i don't know how to tell him tho, &my friend is also in love with him. &i can't help it that i'm a good friend &i'm trying to help out the situation with him &her. but it's backfiring. &i want him all to myself. but i can't do that. because it'll break her heart. &it feels like i have to chose between a friend or love. i mean shit, i'd pick josh over a friend anyday, but what makes the situation hard is that she's in love with him too...wow, i just IMed him &i was like "i hate this" &he was like "i'm sorry for wasting your time" dsfhjdsf. what the fuck. he doesn't understand. i am so fucking in love with him!!!sdkhfkjkshf
i feel sick to my stomach now. =[
i feel sick to my stomach now. =[